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You should make sure your kids can defend and counter attack. Not only physically, but using their brain and resources such as authority figures and the police.
by jotm 9y ago
You should make sure your kids can defend and counter attack. Not only physically, but using their brain and resources such as authority figures and the police.
Maybe you view the world as peaceful and rosy, and that's a good view to have, but always have a fallback.
Speak softly but carry a big stick, you know.
- treyfitty 9y agoThe one thing I resented the most about my peers growing up was that they always tattled and brought their problems to someone else. Kids should learn how to deal with conflict on their own. Deferring to authority and police is a sure fire way to perpetuate the notion of “don’t worry. You’re special. There’s people to take care of you.” People get bullied all the time. Even as adults, just in different forms. Resorting to authority early on is not the best solution.
- feral 9y agoBeing bullied sucks. I will teach my kids to use any tools available to stop them being bullied. If resorting to authority solves the problem, then thats great. That's how you deal with bullies, by using whatever works; not by following some arbitrary code about doing things yourself, or not tattling etc. (Note though I live in Ireland where involving the police sounds pretty bizarre/extreme).
- jotm 9y agoThat is exactly my point - kids need to learn to fight back, and if a punch won't do it, calling everyone from the parents to the principal to the police sure will. Bullies need to learn this isn't an ape tribe, the earlier the better. And as adults, every day can be a battle, if you can't hold your own, you have societal resources to back you up. Of course, this needs to be taught as being a last resort, otherwise they may grow up to be bullies themselves. Having children is hard.
- DanBC 9y agoYour approach prevents children seeking help when they're being abused.