For what it's worth, I agree with you. When I was younger I went to a lot of shows with my friends. Not so much electronic music, but jam bands - which share a

For what it's worth, I agree with you. When I was younger I went to a lot of shows with my friends. Not so much electronic music, but jam bands - which share a lot in common in terms of drugs, extended jams, festivals, etc. I liked the drugs, and I liked the music, but something about the experience of going to shows often left me feeling completely empty. When I was young and looking to find my way in life, I think that music was sold to me as something that should have been very profound and meaningful. And without a doubt I knew plenty of people who pretty much dedicated themselves to the "scene" - dressing a certain way, talking a certain way, holding certain beliefs, and traveling all over to see a handful of bands play in different cities. But despite putting in no small amount of effort to fit in, it just wasn't for me. At one of the last shows I went to in college, I remember being at some huge sold out stadium for a Phish concert and feeling like I was witnessing mass hysteria. I think my negative experiences were more a reflection of my own lack of direction and naive beliefs at the time than anything else. I was looking to get something more valuable out of the experience than it could ever possibly provide. Also... I'm sure the drugs also had an effect on my mood. I've been to shows since, with no expectations beyond catching up with friends and having a fun night out, and had a good time. I also have tons of respect for the performers - all of whom are talented, work hard, and have probably made sacrifices in the pursuit of their passions than I have in mine. But that uncomfortable feeling of sameness in the crowds and that sense of mass hysteria is always still there for me. Kind of like people speaking in tongues, or rioting in the streets when their sports team wins or loses. I guess I'm just more a small gathering kind of person.