5 ms·

>Try setting a calendar entry for a date on which you'll follow up if you haven't heard anything back Thanks for the advice, but surprisingly I have actually t

by _m7bj 9y ago

>Try setting a calendar entry for a date on which you'll follow up if you haven't heard anything back Thanks for the advice, but surprisingly I have actually tried just not having ADD. This simple advice doesn't work very well for me, which is why I'm attempting to pursue medication again. The calendar entry goes off, I try to contact the doctor, maybe they're not in today, it's half way through the work day, I go to set another, I spot an email while I'm doing it and start following up on that, and then 4 months later it never happened.

CydeWeys 9y ago
The point of a to-do list (or reminder in Google Calendar) is that it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it. It sounds like you're using one-off calendar entries. I'm not suggesting that "try not having ADD", just suggesting you use mechanisms to remind you to do stuff that are persistent and thus work.
- chimeracoder 9y ago
  > The point of a to-do list (or reminder in Google Calendar) is that it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it. It sounds like you're using one-off calendar entries. I'm not suggesting that "try not having ADD", just suggesting you use mechanisms to remind you to do stuff that are persistent and thus work. No offense, but from what you're saying, it's pretty clear you don't understand how ADHD works. ADHD is a disorder that affects executive function; the whole problem is that the system you're describing will fail for someone with even moderate but untreated ADHD, let alone more severe cases. Maybe you don't mean it this way, but it's actually rather insulting to say that these mechanisms "are persistent and thus work", or that OP try a to-do list because "it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it". ADHD means that you can't assume that those systems work, and it means that "constantly starting at you until you complete it" isn't actually a viable solution. Hence, that's why OP read your post as "try not having ADD", because you're literally suggesting solutions that presume that they not have ADHD in the first place.
  - CydeWeys 9y ago
    How does a persistent in-your-face reminder that does not go away until completed fail? I suppose severe procrastination or complete lack of willpower would do it, but are these not different from ADHD?
    - turtle789 9y ago
      No, those are often core problems in ADHD. This is (much of) what it means to have poor executive function.
    - deleted 9y ago
      [deleted]
    - costatus 9y ago
      CydeWeys - thanks for your persistent posts... they are a wonderful example of how someone without the condition cannot fathom what is going on "inside" and thinks they can be fixed with a system or willpower. These things help to a point but there is an underlying problem that can't be fixed this way.
    - fragmede 9y ago
      Easy, just close the browser tab and never use calendar or keep ever again. Rational? Far from it. Functional? Nope. That's why it's a disease but we have medication to treat it. It's like trying to tell someone that walking is easy, just put one foot in front of the other - to someone with no legs. Unfortunately it's harder to see missing legs for mental diseases.
    - karmajunkie 9y ago
      Its in your face. For people with ADHD, its a distraction that's willfully ignored while you're trying to complete one of the other hundred things on your to-do list that are also screaming for attention, most of them in more-urgent-but-less-important ways that this attempt to schedule an appointment with yet another provider who's likely going to make you prove once again that your life is falling apart by jumping through your life story and maybe trying some alternative that makes you ill, cranky, and introduces some sexual dysfunction that gives you one more thing to worry about alongside the thoughts of whatdoigetdonethisweekpleasejustletmecrossoffonethingtoday that you wake up to each morning. > severe procrastination or complete lack of willpower This sounds an awful lot like the attribution of a moral failing to people that suffer from an issue with executive function as it pertains to attention. This might be why people keep telling you that you are clearly articulating an inability to empathize. Imagine a mindset in which your fundamental assumptions, which seem self-evident to you, do not apply. If it seems difficult to understand why anybody would want to live that way, congratulations, you've got something in common! Nobody else wants to live that way either—the difference is that we don't have much of a choice, which is why we all have such strong opinions about this topic.

by _m7bj 9y ago

CydeWeys 9y ago

The point of a to-do list (or reminder in Google Calendar) is that it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it. It sounds like you're using one-off calendar entries. I'm not suggesting that "try not having ADD", just suggesting you use mechanisms to remind you to do stuff that are persistent and thus work.

chimeracoder 9y ago
> The point of a to-do list (or reminder in Google Calendar) is that it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it. It sounds like you're using one-off calendar entries. I'm not suggesting that "try not having ADD", just suggesting you use mechanisms to remind you to do stuff that are persistent and thus work. No offense, but from what you're saying, it's pretty clear you don't understand how ADHD works. ADHD is a disorder that affects executive function; the whole problem is that the system you're describing will fail for someone with even moderate but untreated ADHD, let alone more severe cases. Maybe you don't mean it this way, but it's actually rather insulting to say that these mechanisms "are persistent and thus work", or that OP try a to-do list because "it's constantly staring at you until you actually complete it". ADHD means that you can't assume that those systems work, and it means that "constantly starting at you until you complete it" isn't actually a viable solution. Hence, that's why OP read your post as "try not having ADD", because you're literally suggesting solutions that presume that they not have ADHD in the first place.
- CydeWeys 9y ago
  How does a persistent in-your-face reminder that does not go away until completed fail? I suppose severe procrastination or complete lack of willpower would do it, but are these not different from ADHD?
  - turtle789 9y ago
    No, those are often core problems in ADHD. This is (much of) what it means to have poor executive function.
  - deleted 9y ago
    [deleted]
  - costatus 9y ago
    CydeWeys - thanks for your persistent posts... they are a wonderful example of how someone without the condition cannot fathom what is going on "inside" and thinks they can be fixed with a system or willpower. These things help to a point but there is an underlying problem that can't be fixed this way.
  - fragmede 9y ago
    Easy, just close the browser tab and never use calendar or keep ever again. Rational? Far from it. Functional? Nope. That's why it's a disease but we have medication to treat it. It's like trying to tell someone that walking is easy, just put one foot in front of the other - to someone with no legs. Unfortunately it's harder to see missing legs for mental diseases.
  - karmajunkie 9y ago
    Its in your face. For people with ADHD, its a distraction that's willfully ignored while you're trying to complete one of the other hundred things on your to-do list that are also screaming for attention, most of them in more-urgent-but-less-important ways that this attempt to schedule an appointment with yet another provider who's likely going to make you prove once again that your life is falling apart by jumping through your life story and maybe trying some alternative that makes you ill, cranky, and introduces some sexual dysfunction that gives you one more thing to worry about alongside the thoughts of whatdoigetdonethisweekpleasejustletmecrossoffonethingtoday that you wake up to each morning. > severe procrastination or complete lack of willpower This sounds an awful lot like the attribution of a moral failing to people that suffer from an issue with executive function as it pertains to attention. This might be why people keep telling you that you are clearly articulating an inability to empathize. Imagine a mindset in which your fundamental assumptions, which seem self-evident to you, do not apply. If it seems difficult to understand why anybody would want to live that way, congratulations, you've got something in common! Nobody else wants to live that way either—the difference is that we don't have much of a choice, which is why we all have such strong opinions about this topic.