> What kind of filter do I want my employees or coworkers to have at work? Should we systematically favor bravado over vulnerability? My gut feeling is that we

> What kind of filter do I want my employees or coworkers to have at work? Should we systematically favor bravado over vulnerability? My gut feeling is that we should not. I think structural/procedural solutions can be very helpful to encourage honest discussion. For example, rather than asking "when do you think you can have this done by?" you can ask "let's try to estimate this story in a timeboxed way, as a group, using planning poker". I know it may sound silly to those who have not done it before, but it works really well. It's difficult to explain the real reason why this helps so much without revealing more than I'd rather reveal in public. Also, and relatedly, to the extent that you wish people to be more open and take ownership of problems such that they can honestly discuss their work-related problems rather than trying to keep you happy and play office politics, you can try to exhibit servant leadership. But you can't really be a servant leader when it comes to some issues, like hiring and firing - and by consequence, performance review. There you have to be firm but fair.