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Best solution to loneliness is to gain massive debt, become dirt poor, and battle daily with attention deficit issues while you struggle to learn and become pro

Best solution to loneliness is to gain massive debt, become dirt poor, and battle daily with attention deficit issues while you struggle to learn and become productive enough to get a job in the software industry with a pretty horrible work history, an incomplete bachelors, and a near worthless associates. Living one rung lower on Maslow's hierarchy makes you forget about the desire to be around people, or even leave the house (father's) all that often (2% of the time). Granted, I think maybe my concern for my health (irrational or not) has been exacerbated, so I've traded loneliness for frequent panic attacks concerning whether or not I might have cancer or a heart defect. On the plus side, I know for a fact that I've torn back muscles weight lifting, so all I really need is the medicaid office to get back to me after submitting my 4th application with no phone calls or emails as to my status.

martin_andrino 9y ago
Let’s leave politics aside please.
- fsloth 9y ago
  Why? Policies affect happiness very much, if we include 'not being miserable and destitute' as an option in the happiness spectrum.
- RandomInteger4 9y ago
  Politics? Que? I didn't mention anything political.
marincounty 9y ago
I'm in a similar situation. People don't talk about it, but the club has gotten huge, at least from my vantage point. I don't think people are being more honest, or it's the ease of communication over the internet. A lot of people are trying to manage a mix of intense anxiety, and depression. I look around and technology has just made things worse. (Yea--I know one day--technology might eradicate cancer. I'm not going to argue. Today--I wish the smartphone was Never invented. ) I have always thought too much about death. It's kinda ruined my life. That said, my only preparation for eventual illness is getting rid the television. I've never thought it was healthy to be reminded daily through commercials I will get cancer, or if lucky just, die of a quick heart attack. And so many lonely people use t.v to alleviate the pain of being alone, or at least I do. I haven't got rid of it yet, but it will come. I do have a healthy collection of movies on dvds. As I aged, I do see why people do drugs. And yes--I do exercise daily. It does help.
mattmanser 9y ago
Ouch. Hope it gets better. Have you tried subreddits like https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/ https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/, /r/offmychest/, or something like 7 cups of tea? As the story relates, we're more like to offer practical advice here on HN rather than the emotional support you probably need right now. It does, honestly, get better. You're making the right moves, even if it does all look desperate right now.
- RandomInteger4 9y ago
  Danke. I'm cool for the most part right now. I've come to embrace my anxiety to an extent. If I'm able to type, then that means it's mostly not affecting me at the moment. Late night just has me feeling a lack of inhibition and dis-concern for my privacy on these matters. As far as caffeine goes, I don't know what I'd do without it. Up until recently I was on 2 doses of 3 cups (measurement unit) of espresso per day, but I've realized that I needed to up the dosage, or at least the source. So I went down to 1 dose of 3 cups of espresso + 1 caffeine pill later on, 1 Monster Energy (lowest caffeine content of all my sources I believe), and 1 cup of green tea. This also has the side benefit of pain relief from the muscle tear issues. As for software development, I'm in the process of learning the ins and outs of OAuth and OpenID Connect prior to implementing a sign up and login. Using Node, so it seems like there is a wealth of tutorials out there for passport, and apparently many of them are insecure (or so I've read), so I want to fully understand the concepts behind the most commonly accepted as secure protocols for Authorization and Authentication. Please correct me if I've said anything gibberish; still learning.
  - mattmanser 9y ago
    Caffeine can cause anxiety, I gave it up for a while when I started suffering from panic attacks and it helped. I was lucky that I had no withdrawl headaches. Also, sleep. Good sleep, a bit of regular exercise and a bit of a routine are a great deal of help to stablizing your mood and anxieties. OAuth and OpenID are completely, ridiculously, utterly, pathetically over-complicated. It's one of the worst specs ever released. You do not need to know it to be a professional developer. Most professional developers will have no clue how it works. Trust me, I have over a decade of experience. If you can get a plug and play library, I really would just do that. Especially while learning development. I mean, if you're enjoying it, go ahead, but OAuth is basically stupid. A cruel joke inflicted on developers and a lesson in how not to make a spec.

martin_andrino 9y ago

Let’s leave politics aside please.

fsloth 9y ago
Why? Policies affect happiness very much, if we include 'not being miserable and destitute' as an option in the happiness spectrum.
RandomInteger4 9y ago
Politics? Que? I didn't mention anything political.

marincounty 9y ago

I'm in a similar situation. People don't talk about it, but the club has gotten huge, at least from my vantage point. I don't think people are being more honest, or it's the ease of communication over the internet. A lot of people are trying to manage a mix of intense anxiety, and depression. I look around and technology has just made things worse. (Yea--I know one day--technology might eradicate cancer. I'm not going to argue. Today--I wish the smartphone was Never invented. ) I have always thought too much about death. It's kinda ruined my life. That said, my only preparation for eventual illness is getting rid the television. I've never thought it was healthy to be reminded daily through commercials I will get cancer, or if lucky just, die of a quick heart attack. And so many lonely people use t.v to alleviate the pain of being alone, or at least I do. I haven't got rid of it yet, but it will come. I do have a healthy collection of movies on dvds. As I aged, I do see why people do drugs. And yes--I do exercise daily. It does help.

mattmanser 9y ago

Ouch. Hope it gets better. Have you tried subreddits like https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/ https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/, /r/offmychest/, or something like 7 cups of tea? As the story relates, we're more like to offer practical advice here on HN rather than the emotional support you probably need right now. It does, honestly, get better. You're making the right moves, even if it does all look desperate right now.

RandomInteger4 9y ago
Danke. I'm cool for the most part right now. I've come to embrace my anxiety to an extent. If I'm able to type, then that means it's mostly not affecting me at the moment. Late night just has me feeling a lack of inhibition and dis-concern for my privacy on these matters. As far as caffeine goes, I don't know what I'd do without it. Up until recently I was on 2 doses of 3 cups (measurement unit) of espresso per day, but I've realized that I needed to up the dosage, or at least the source. So I went down to 1 dose of 3 cups of espresso + 1 caffeine pill later on, 1 Monster Energy (lowest caffeine content of all my sources I believe), and 1 cup of green tea. This also has the side benefit of pain relief from the muscle tear issues. As for software development, I'm in the process of learning the ins and outs of OAuth and OpenID Connect prior to implementing a sign up and login. Using Node, so it seems like there is a wealth of tutorials out there for passport, and apparently many of them are insecure (or so I've read), so I want to fully understand the concepts behind the most commonly accepted as secure protocols for Authorization and Authentication. Please correct me if I've said anything gibberish; still learning.
- mattmanser 9y ago
  Caffeine can cause anxiety, I gave it up for a while when I started suffering from panic attacks and it helped. I was lucky that I had no withdrawl headaches. Also, sleep. Good sleep, a bit of regular exercise and a bit of a routine are a great deal of help to stablizing your mood and anxieties. OAuth and OpenID are completely, ridiculously, utterly, pathetically over-complicated. It's one of the worst specs ever released. You do not need to know it to be a professional developer. Most professional developers will have no clue how it works. Trust me, I have over a decade of experience. If you can get a plug and play library, I really would just do that. Especially while learning development. I mean, if you're enjoying it, go ahead, but OAuth is basically stupid. A cruel joke inflicted on developers and a lesson in how not to make a spec.