6 ms·

> All because FB's algorithm presumably decided that he didn't post much, so he didn't warrant enough attention in our feeds. All because you've given Facebook

by a3n 9y ago

> All because FB's algorithm presumably decided that he didn't post much, so he didn't warrant enough attention in our feeds. All because you've given Facebook responsibility for keeping in touch. One suggestion for keeping in control and in touch: a less algorithmic address list in email. "Oh, but I don't want to manage that." Well, how good is what you're using now working? Is that chance of someone outside the list serendipitously stumbling across a post really that valuable? And, sorry for her loss.

lykr0n 9y ago
Are you suggesting having a friends mailing list? That doesn't really work for a dynamic pool of people.
- Spooky23 9y ago
  It kind of says a lot for the influence of Facebook where suggesting that perhaps you shoot an email to a friend seems like an impractical thing to do.
  - sverige 9y ago
    Heaven forfend suggesting making a phone call, which is how I keep in touch with friends. Real friends, that is.
    - 83457 9y ago
      Are they real friends though if you only talk to them on the phone? I keep in touch with my friends in person by going to their door and knocking. Real friends that is.
      - DoreenMichele 9y ago
        Pshaw. I use a psychic connection. If you can't contact them psychically, how close are you really?
      - EpicEng 9y ago
        Well my real friends live 1500 miles away, so yeah, phone it is.
      - sverige 9y ago
        Friends since the 80s, have kept in touch all that time, live >1000 miles away. Real friends are those people with whom you can be yourself, who understand what you don't say as well as they understand what you do say.
  - wpietri 9y ago
    The suggestion was not to shoot an email to a friend. It was for continuously maintaining "an address list in email".
  - freeflight 9y ago
    It's nothing to do with "the influence of Facebook", it's to do with progress in usability and use case. If you just want to send a message to a friend then there are a myriad of ways to do that which neither involve email nor Facebook. If you boil it down to why people actually use Facebook, then Facebook is nothing but a fancier and comfortable version of "keeping a list of emails", just with very nasty side-effects.
macintux 9y ago
Look, I don't like Facebook. I reluctantly caved because there was too much going on there that I was missing, but I'd rather not be a participant. But you're ignoring the fact that Facebook is effectively the first opportunity in history for a universal "push" mechanism for friendship. If your best friend died, would you really know how to contact everyone he/she was friends with? You could dig through their Rolodex in the old days, which would cover some percentage but also pick up a lot of outdated contact information and business relationships with no friendship involved; you could send email to everyone you could find in their mailbox, but that surely wouldn't hit everyone; you could dial all phone numbers in their phone, but same problem. And obituaries are pull-based, and tend to be localized. FB, for better or worse, has the potential to be the most effective way in the history of mankind to tell everyone who knew someone that person has passed on.
- QAPereo 9y ago
  I can’t imagine a group of people and less trust and want to manage my relationships at that level than the people who run Facebook. If I’m being honest I can’t think of a third-party I’d like to relegate that responsibility to, not that I think it should be relegated, it is after all central to the process of maintaining friendships. Maybe the “friendship“ people think they have online is something other than what is traditionally been thought of as friendship.
  - macintux 9y ago
    When you die, how effective are you going to be at telling everyone you consider your friends that you've passed on? Do you have an email list right now that someone could use to share that news and hit 100% of your friends? The nature of "Facebook friendship" as it pertains to real friendship is orthogonal and irrelevant to this question: in a world where genuine friendship spans continents and social circles, how do you notify everyone who cares that someone has died?
    - EpicEng 9y ago
      The people who matter would know because they are involved in your life. Everyone else is just someone you used to know. Let's not up and change the definition of 'friend' to someone you haven't seen or spoken to personally in years but resides in your FB friends list.
pishpash 9y ago
Facebook sells itself as the tool for keeping in touch. If it sells itself as the tool to sell you stuff, how many users would there be?
- a3n 9y ago
  How many users does Amazon have?
- NightlyDev 9y ago
  Facebook it a tool to sell you stuff..
freeflight 9y ago
> All because you've given Facebook responsibility for keeping in touch. Because let's face it: In this day and age it's the most practical way to do so. It's the one place where you can aggregate all your personal relationships from different "communities" you interact with. > One suggestion for keeping in control and in touch: a less algorithmic address list in email. "I don't want to manage that" is a legitimate excuse in this case, just like it's a bit dishonest to compare "writing emails" with what social media does. There's value to be had here, helping people connect with each other, in easy and obvious ways, is a noble goal. I don't want to explain to my grandparents how to manage mailing lists, but I'd still love for them to partake in the "digital happenings" of friends and family. In that regard, social media also serves the function of a public diary for many people, giving opportunities to share and appreciate. That's a need that shouldn't be underestimated, but it most certainly could be facilitated in a better way than with this sole focus on commercialization through advertisement.

by a3n 9y ago

lykr0n 9y ago

Are you suggesting having a friends mailing list? That doesn't really work for a dynamic pool of people.

Spooky23 9y ago
It kind of says a lot for the influence of Facebook where suggesting that perhaps you shoot an email to a friend seems like an impractical thing to do.
- sverige 9y ago
  Heaven forfend suggesting making a phone call, which is how I keep in touch with friends. Real friends, that is.
  - 83457 9y ago
    Are they real friends though if you only talk to them on the phone? I keep in touch with my friends in person by going to their door and knocking. Real friends that is.
    - DoreenMichele 9y ago
      Pshaw. I use a psychic connection. If you can't contact them psychically, how close are you really?
    - EpicEng 9y ago
      Well my real friends live 1500 miles away, so yeah, phone it is.
    - sverige 9y ago
      Friends since the 80s, have kept in touch all that time, live >1000 miles away. Real friends are those people with whom you can be yourself, who understand what you don't say as well as they understand what you do say.
- wpietri 9y ago
  The suggestion was not to shoot an email to a friend. It was for continuously maintaining "an address list in email".
- freeflight 9y ago
  It's nothing to do with "the influence of Facebook", it's to do with progress in usability and use case. If you just want to send a message to a friend then there are a myriad of ways to do that which neither involve email nor Facebook. If you boil it down to why people actually use Facebook, then Facebook is nothing but a fancier and comfortable version of "keeping a list of emails", just with very nasty side-effects.

macintux 9y ago

Look, I don't like Facebook. I reluctantly caved because there was too much going on there that I was missing, but I'd rather not be a participant. But you're ignoring the fact that Facebook is effectively the first opportunity in history for a universal "push" mechanism for friendship. If your best friend died, would you really know how to contact everyone he/she was friends with? You could dig through their Rolodex in the old days, which would cover some percentage but also pick up a lot of outdated contact information and business relationships with no friendship involved; you could send email to everyone you could find in their mailbox, but that surely wouldn't hit everyone; you could dial all phone numbers in their phone, but same problem. And obituaries are pull-based, and tend to be localized. FB, for better or worse, has the potential to be the most effective way in the history of mankind to tell everyone who knew someone that person has passed on.

QAPereo 9y ago
I can’t imagine a group of people and less trust and want to manage my relationships at that level than the people who run Facebook. If I’m being honest I can’t think of a third-party I’d like to relegate that responsibility to, not that I think it should be relegated, it is after all central to the process of maintaining friendships. Maybe the “friendship“ people think they have online is something other than what is traditionally been thought of as friendship.
- macintux 9y ago
  When you die, how effective are you going to be at telling everyone you consider your friends that you've passed on? Do you have an email list right now that someone could use to share that news and hit 100% of your friends? The nature of "Facebook friendship" as it pertains to real friendship is orthogonal and irrelevant to this question: in a world where genuine friendship spans continents and social circles, how do you notify everyone who cares that someone has died?
  - EpicEng 9y ago
    The people who matter would know because they are involved in your life. Everyone else is just someone you used to know. Let's not up and change the definition of 'friend' to someone you haven't seen or spoken to personally in years but resides in your FB friends list.

pishpash 9y ago

Facebook sells itself as the tool for keeping in touch. If it sells itself as the tool to sell you stuff, how many users would there be?

a3n 9y ago
How many users does Amazon have?
NightlyDev 9y ago
Facebook it a tool to sell you stuff..

freeflight 9y ago

> All because you've given Facebook responsibility for keeping in touch. Because let's face it: In this day and age it's the most practical way to do so. It's the one place where you can aggregate all your personal relationships from different "communities" you interact with. > One suggestion for keeping in control and in touch: a less algorithmic address list in email. "I don't want to manage that" is a legitimate excuse in this case, just like it's a bit dishonest to compare "writing emails" with what social media does. There's value to be had here, helping people connect with each other, in easy and obvious ways, is a noble goal. I don't want to explain to my grandparents how to manage mailing lists, but I'd still love for them to partake in the "digital happenings" of friends and family. In that regard, social media also serves the function of a public diary for many people, giving opportunities to share and appreciate. That's a need that shouldn't be underestimated, but it most certainly could be facilitated in a better way than with this sole focus on commercialization through advertisement.