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This article struck a chord for me. Most of the people who form an integral part of my life were met by pure chance. My angel investor was coming back home one

This article struck a chord for me. Most of the people who form an integral part of my life were met by pure chance. My angel investor was coming back home one night, after a party, and the street dog I take care of started jumping up on him. So, I pulled him off and chatted with him for a while. He told me to come back next day and that was that. I do the same thing with everyone I meet from security guards to random strangers. Everyone has something you can learn from. Everyone has a story it's just that most people never listen. On the other hand, I've noticed that if you go out with a fixed agenda in mind; I want to meet angels, or something. There is a higher probability that it won't work. Most people have this ability to sense other people's agendas and that puts them off. No one wants to be used, but everyone likes an intelligent/decent conversation... [edit: I forgot to add one of the most interesting ones. Recently, I met this woman in the park, who was there with her dogs. I started playing with them and I picked up a conversation with her. It turned out that she was an artist (mainly a dancer) and I spent half an hour with her talking about the beauty of things around us. We analyzed the shades of the trees how beautiful they were dancing in the wind, while the light played with their leaves. We talked about her dogs and her work. It had to be one of the most interesting conversations I've had in years, and the best part is that she liked it. :) ]

weaksauce 16y ago
I think this raises a good point. Chance encounters are not really all that random. If you go out there with a genuine personality and are a decent human being that is interested in what makes other people unique you are going to be ahead in life. You are essentially making chance encounters all the time.
abalashov 16y ago
Nearly everything good that has happened to me that was caused or assisted by other people (most things) has happened in a manner that is difficult to see as anything but the accident of thousands of favourably coincidental factors. It seems obvious that one can increase the probability of this occurring by interacting with more people and creating more opportunities, from a purely statistical perspective, for something useful to emerge. The best way is to do so in a goal-oriented but not overly-specific or insincere way, as you say. Why does this merit an article or a book?
- astrofinch 16y ago
  "Why does this merit an article or a book?" Most popular nonfiction books written nowadays can be summed up in a few sentences. So this example isn't really that unusual. Blogs > books
astrofinch 16y ago
"Most people have this ability to sense other people's agendas and that puts them off." Hypotheses: Humans have two modes of interaction with one another: social and economic. People tend to react much more favorably to each other during social mode, and this mode is only accessible during casual (serendipitous) encounters. Salespeople are good at tricking others in to assuming the social interaction mode while the salesperson is assuming economic interaction mode. The two modes theory explains why it's considered impolite to discuss how much money you make with friends.
- a00021 16y ago
  Counterpoint on the "impolite to discuss how much money you make with friends" - from my experience in two European countries, this seems to be largely a US-centric phenomenon. On this side of the pond closer acquaintances have no problem discussing career, including the financial specifics of it. This is only one data point, of course.
Gormo 16y ago
It's no coincidence that the people that you happened to meet during the course of your life also happened to be the ones who had the strongest influence on you. The specific set of people you encounter may be largely a function of chance, but having the right mindset and drive to make the most of those relationships is not something you can't intentionally build.

weaksauce 16y ago

I think this raises a good point. Chance encounters are not really all that random. If you go out there with a genuine personality and are a decent human being that is interested in what makes other people unique you are going to be ahead in life. You are essentially making chance encounters all the time.

abalashov 16y ago

Nearly everything good that has happened to me that was caused or assisted by other people (most things) has happened in a manner that is difficult to see as anything but the accident of thousands of favourably coincidental factors. It seems obvious that one can increase the probability of this occurring by interacting with more people and creating more opportunities, from a purely statistical perspective, for something useful to emerge. The best way is to do so in a goal-oriented but not overly-specific or insincere way, as you say. Why does this merit an article or a book?

astrofinch 16y ago
"Why does this merit an article or a book?" Most popular nonfiction books written nowadays can be summed up in a few sentences. So this example isn't really that unusual. Blogs > books

astrofinch 16y ago

"Most people have this ability to sense other people's agendas and that puts them off." Hypotheses: Humans have two modes of interaction with one another: social and economic. People tend to react much more favorably to each other during social mode, and this mode is only accessible during casual (serendipitous) encounters. Salespeople are good at tricking others in to assuming the social interaction mode while the salesperson is assuming economic interaction mode. The two modes theory explains why it's considered impolite to discuss how much money you make with friends.

a00021 16y ago
Counterpoint on the "impolite to discuss how much money you make with friends" - from my experience in two European countries, this seems to be largely a US-centric phenomenon. On this side of the pond closer acquaintances have no problem discussing career, including the financial specifics of it. This is only one data point, of course.

Gormo 16y ago

It's no coincidence that the people that you happened to meet during the course of your life also happened to be the ones who had the strongest influence on you. The specific set of people you encounter may be largely a function of chance, but having the right mindset and drive to make the most of those relationships is not something you can't intentionally build.