4 ms·

Date agressively and widely for 6 months-year. Double down on someoone who seems promising and date that person for a year or two. Marry that person with a sho

Date agressively and widely for 6 months-year. Double down on someoone who seems promising and date that person for a year or two. Marry that person with a short-ish engagement. Begin having kids. That can be done in 2-4 years.

ottumm 9y ago
And they say romance is dead.
nothrabannosir 9y ago
Our concepts of relationships, parenthood and (crucially) romance are so far apart you’d need a space shuttle to go between them. This is... not exactly actionable advice for everyone ?
- swsieber 9y ago
  What is your concept of romance? I think the parent's posting is more applicable than you might think - putting in the effort to go on dates and really get to know a person does a lot to cultivate romance. Nothing kills romance like hanging-out, but my perception might be different than yours - my ideal romance leads to a life-long relationship, which takes the same kind of effort that the parent's suggestion called for (deliberate effort focus on a romantic relationship).
- deleted 9y ago
  [deleted]
icedchai 9y ago
You forgot the part about getting divorced and going broke. Sometimes, it's worth waiting a bit.
- Spooky23 9y ago
  It's not really germane. Statistically, your divorce probability drops dramatically when you get married at 25, and doesn't change much afterward. Once you're married at 25, the primary risk factors are: substance abuse (obvious), prior cohabitation (many people feel they "slide" into marriage when they do this), and unemployment.
  - icedchai 9y ago
    If you make the wrong decision, you're looking at potentially losing half of your assets in a divorce. Plus, if you're unlucky enough to have a kid, there's another 18 years of child support. If you survive that without going broke, you'll also probably feel compelled to pay for college. There goes another half million. Of course, maybe it's not quite that bad. Maybe you're just really miserable all the time. Things aren't quite terrible enough to leave your marriage, especially considering the consequences, so you suffer for a couple of decades. Instead of giving up half your money, you give up half your life and most of your freedom. I have friends in this very situation. They tell me they wished they stayed single. Yeah, I'd say finding the right partner is pretty germane.

ottumm 9y ago

And they say romance is dead.

nothrabannosir 9y ago

Our concepts of relationships, parenthood and (crucially) romance are so far apart you’d need a space shuttle to go between them. This is... not exactly actionable advice for everyone ?

swsieber 9y ago
What is your concept of romance? I think the parent's posting is more applicable than you might think - putting in the effort to go on dates and really get to know a person does a lot to cultivate romance. Nothing kills romance like hanging-out, but my perception might be different than yours - my ideal romance leads to a life-long relationship, which takes the same kind of effort that the parent's suggestion called for (deliberate effort focus on a romantic relationship).
deleted 9y ago
[deleted]

icedchai 9y ago

You forgot the part about getting divorced and going broke. Sometimes, it's worth waiting a bit.

Spooky23 9y ago
It's not really germane. Statistically, your divorce probability drops dramatically when you get married at 25, and doesn't change much afterward. Once you're married at 25, the primary risk factors are: substance abuse (obvious), prior cohabitation (many people feel they "slide" into marriage when they do this), and unemployment.
- icedchai 9y ago
  If you make the wrong decision, you're looking at potentially losing half of your assets in a divorce. Plus, if you're unlucky enough to have a kid, there's another 18 years of child support. If you survive that without going broke, you'll also probably feel compelled to pay for college. There goes another half million. Of course, maybe it's not quite that bad. Maybe you're just really miserable all the time. Things aren't quite terrible enough to leave your marriage, especially considering the consequences, so you suffer for a couple of decades. Instead of giving up half your money, you give up half your life and most of your freedom. I have friends in this very situation. They tell me they wished they stayed single. Yeah, I'd say finding the right partner is pretty germane.