My reasons: 1) I just seriously don't have the energy because of my medical condition. I suspect this broadly applies to many people: They don't have the energ

My reasons: 1) I just seriously don't have the energy because of my medical condition. I suspect this broadly applies to many people: They don't have the energy for some reason, then they or others call them lazy or a procrastinator, things I was called my whole life until I finally got the right diagnosis. 2) Trying to accomplish stuff has been so much drama in the past that I want to try to find a path forward that doesn't essentially explode in my face. Having things explode in my face always felt like 2 steps forward, 27 steps back. It wasn't productive. It was counterproductive. 3) Having figured out some of the things I want to do and how to (mostly) avoid terrible explosions, I still have only the most slender concept of how to make that actually fly. I am working on fleshing out those plans. Sorting that out strikes me as the difference between the Wright Brothers launching their first test flight and hurling myself off a cliff willy nilly like a lemming.