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This has become almost cartoonish. The people being accused of sexual harassment did overtly and obviously abusive things. That doesn’t call for a referendum on

by sp527 9y ago

This has become almost cartoonish. The people being accused of sexual harassment did overtly and obviously abusive things. That doesn’t call for a referendum on the entire scope of male-female interactions. If you have to wonder whether you’re a sexual harasser and aren’t stupid or deliberately oblivious, then the answer is you are not one. You may still be somewhere on the misogyny spectrum. You may even make women feel uncomfortable with some of the things you say and do. But the term sexual harassment should be reserved for obviously inappropriate conduct, and not be cheapened into some thin-gray-line class of transgression. Also if our society starts treating flirting with or attempting to date coworkers as problematic behavior, people will lose the opportunity to potentially find mates in an environment to which they’re devoting increasingly larger shares of their lives. The only people who will win in that scenario are the therapists.

deleted 9y ago
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JBlue42 9y ago
Yes, thank you. You pretty much echoed something John Scalzi said on his blog: https://whatever.scalzi.com/2017/11/12/a-qa-for-the-post-weinstein-era/ https://whatever.scalzi.com/2017/11/12/a-qa-for-the-post-wei... It's a bit long but worth reading. At the end: "Dudes, don’t be a harassing piece of shit, don’t accept other dudes being harassing pieces of shit, and when women (and others) tell you that someone has harassed or assaulted them, believe them."
flukus 9y ago
> The people being accused of sexual harassment did overtly and obviously abusive things. They were accused of doing those things, the accusations alone were enough to be career ending, that's the problem. As long as society is fine with vilifying people on accusations alone then the only defense is to not put yourself into a situation where such an accusation can be made.
- telesilla 9y ago
  Please read the Scalzi blog post linked above: "Aside from the actual fact that a woman accusing a man of harassment has her life turned into such a shitshow that the bar for her choosing to tell her story is almost unspeakably high (and therefore not fertile ground for lying), I want you to consider a singular and depressing fact, which is that nearly every woman you know has actual dudes who’ve harassed them. They will go after them, rather than outright lying about you."

by sp527 9y ago

deleted 9y ago

[deleted]

JBlue42 9y ago

Yes, thank you. You pretty much echoed something John Scalzi said on his blog: https://whatever.scalzi.com/2017/11/12/a-qa-for-the-post-weinstein-era/ https://whatever.scalzi.com/2017/11/12/a-qa-for-the-post-wei... It's a bit long but worth reading. At the end: "Dudes, don’t be a harassing piece of shit, don’t accept other dudes being harassing pieces of shit, and when women (and others) tell you that someone has harassed or assaulted them, believe them."

flukus 9y ago

> The people being accused of sexual harassment did overtly and obviously abusive things. They were accused of doing those things, the accusations alone were enough to be career ending, that's the problem. As long as society is fine with vilifying people on accusations alone then the only defense is to not put yourself into a situation where such an accusation can be made.

telesilla 9y ago
Please read the Scalzi blog post linked above: "Aside from the actual fact that a woman accusing a man of harassment has her life turned into such a shitshow that the bar for her choosing to tell her story is almost unspeakably high (and therefore not fertile ground for lying), I want you to consider a singular and depressing fact, which is that nearly every woman you know has actual dudes who’ve harassed them. They will go after them, rather than outright lying about you."