5 ms·

> never, ever comment on their appearance, including new hairstyles, clothing, etc. That it's come to this is really sad.

astura 9y ago
Sad? No! It's always been impolite to comment on people's appearance unless you are close with them. When you make comments about the appearance of your coworker there's so much that has the potential to be misunderstood and it's just so totally unnecessary. This isn't new either, Miss Manners has been advocating it since the 70s.
- orblivion 9y ago
  I can't say "hey nice haircut"? Just because there may be an ounce of sexual undertone? There's a line not to be crossed, but Jesus you're talking about neutering our humanity here.
  - deleted 9y ago
    [deleted]
  - astura 9y ago
    You can say whatever you want. It's just, as a general rule, impolite to make comments on people's physical appearance even if you mean well and it always has been. Doubly so in the workplace. People are impolite all the time, when you are a married women like I am, intimate details of your uterus suddenly becomes something strangers talk about. Extremely rude, but unfortunately common. Behaving politely in the office is in your best interest. It's not about "neutering our humanity," it's about etiquette. Defecation is an essential part of humanity and life, yet there's something preventing you from just dropping your pants and taking a shit wherever you happen to be when the urge hits you. https://hbr.org/2003/12/in-praise-of-boundaries-a-conversation-with-miss-manners https://hbr.org/2003/12/in-praise-of-boundaries-a-conversati... >Martin makes a compelling case that business needs more etiquette, not less. Without some formality in social intercourse, she argues, human interactions end up being governed by laws, which are too blunt to guide people through the nuances of personal—or professional—behavior. "Nice haircut" is pretty benign but best avoided. Many times people feel the need to make rude comments about others but try to disguise it into a backhanded complement. You don't want to be misunderstood.
- noobermin 9y ago
  To be fair, I think that only applies to if you have something negative to say.
  - astura 9y ago
    No, its impolite to make comments on other people's appearance, even positive, unless you are close to that person. Please stop making unsolicited comments about my body, please and thank you.

astura 9y ago

Sad? No! It's always been impolite to comment on people's appearance unless you are close with them. When you make comments about the appearance of your coworker there's so much that has the potential to be misunderstood and it's just so totally unnecessary. This isn't new either, Miss Manners has been advocating it since the 70s.

orblivion 9y ago
I can't say "hey nice haircut"? Just because there may be an ounce of sexual undertone? There's a line not to be crossed, but Jesus you're talking about neutering our humanity here.
- deleted 9y ago
  [deleted]
- astura 9y ago
  You can say whatever you want. It's just, as a general rule, impolite to make comments on people's physical appearance even if you mean well and it always has been. Doubly so in the workplace. People are impolite all the time, when you are a married women like I am, intimate details of your uterus suddenly becomes something strangers talk about. Extremely rude, but unfortunately common. Behaving politely in the office is in your best interest. It's not about "neutering our humanity," it's about etiquette. Defecation is an essential part of humanity and life, yet there's something preventing you from just dropping your pants and taking a shit wherever you happen to be when the urge hits you. https://hbr.org/2003/12/in-praise-of-boundaries-a-conversation-with-miss-manners https://hbr.org/2003/12/in-praise-of-boundaries-a-conversati... >Martin makes a compelling case that business needs more etiquette, not less. Without some formality in social intercourse, she argues, human interactions end up being governed by laws, which are too blunt to guide people through the nuances of personal—or professional—behavior. "Nice haircut" is pretty benign but best avoided. Many times people feel the need to make rude comments about others but try to disguise it into a backhanded complement. You don't want to be misunderstood.
noobermin 9y ago
To be fair, I think that only applies to if you have something negative to say.
- astura 9y ago
  No, its impolite to make comments on other people's appearance, even positive, unless you are close to that person. Please stop making unsolicited comments about my body, please and thank you.