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I don't think it is helpful to pretend there is no gray area. Talking about how to avoid grey areas is good. Pretending they don't exist is potentially dangerou
by Mz 9y ago
I don't think it is helpful to pretend there is no gray area. Talking about how to avoid grey areas is good. Pretending they don't exist is potentially dangerous and strikes me as toxic and blamey.
- noobermin 9y agoI think there might be a gray area, but it's probably less broad than people make it out to be.
- Mz 9y agoI have found that it is possible to entirely avoid gray areas by abiding by very strict standards that avoid any possible misinterpretation. I have also found this makes me seem cold, rejecting and unapproachable. Establishing trust is a kind of bonding process. It involves taking risks. If you put nothing on the line, you don't bond. If you are never warm, trust is unlikely. If you are ever warm, confusion about intent remains possible. I don't think I can agree with you.
- noobermin 9y agoI mean, a lot of it can just be people are different and will find they need to do different things in order to interact with others successfully without problems, so if you need rules, I suppose that's just you. An aside, but regarding your "coldness." I don't think that's a problem. Most people I think even when they are "warm" aren't necessarily naive and too willing to trust although society stereotypes them that way.
- deleted 9y ago[deleted]