2 ms·
No it's not but it's hard for the hysteria to settle and thus a lot of men will be wrongfully accused.
by ThomPete 9y ago
No it's not but it's hard for the hysteria to settle and thus a lot of men will be wrongfully accused.
- neom 9y agoWrongfully accused of what? OP literally described how not to be accused of anything 101. Treat women like your fellow man, treat women like humans.
- ThomPete 9y agoI know what OP is describing and I am saying that that's not enough as there are difference of opinion with regards to what that means. For some saying sweetie is sexual abuse.
- tabeth 9y agoI'm curious: would you call a man sweetie?
- ThomPete 9y agoNo just like I wouldn't call a girl bro or dude or m8. I see no issue in saying that to someone and have never had any problems saying it to the women I have been working with or know. I am well aware of when to do that and when to not. Yet now it's suddenly become an issue because some consider it sexual abuse.
- neom 9y agoYou don't think it's condescending to call someone sweetie at work?
- ThomPete 9y agoNo. What's condescending about it? It's all about context. That's completely missed in this discussion.
- colanderman 9y agoThe word you're looking for is "harassment", not "abuse". Married couples call each other "sweetie", as do parents their children. It's not an appropriate term to use with co-workers (either male→female or female→male, both of which I've heard).
- ThomPete 9y agono thats not the word i am looking for. some considder sweeite to be sexual abuse exactly the issue with metoo.
- colanderman 9y agoOK, I'll bite, who calls it "abuse"? Because without an example, it looks to me like you're presenting a straw man to trivialize legitimate complaints.
- ThomPete 9y agosome of the metoo participant in fb and twitter threads.
- noobermin 9y agoAllow the following thought experiment: would you call a co-worker who is non-white "brownie"? "Sweetie" has that connotation nowadays. I can try to sympathetic to what seem like onerous rules, but refraining from "sweetie" seems like the least of problems.
- ThomPete 9y agoSweetie has no such connotation amongst the people I have worked with. This is exactly the problem. It's all about context which the metoo campaing completely destroys by equalizing everything.
- noobermin 9y agoAlright, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that's just how it is for you. It does depends on the context, but when you interact with others outside your circle (or hire outside your circle), you have to be somewhat sensitive to their perceptions. I think that is just "human interaction 101."
- ThomPete 9y agoof course but the problem obviously arises when someone new come on board. do they adapt to the culture or walk away or do the culture respect the subjective opinions of the newcommer. in my world that should be up to the culture as long as nothing illegal is going on.
- noobermin 9y agoIt's a difficult situation, I think. I think a linear combination is best, but which axis the vector points along, it might be hard to say. I think the only thing I'd want is to not have a newcomer feel shut out because they can't adapt. You've actually given me something to think about. Cheers.
- ThomPete 9y ago