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I've always struggled with dinner parties. I love them immensely, but I found that it's hard to get people to come. Just to get more than three friends in the s

I've always struggled with dinner parties. I love them immensely, but I found that it's hard to get people to come. Just to get more than three friends in the same room can be tough. The older I get the more I find that people prefer to stay home, or go out to eat. Going to someone's home seems like extra effort

hvvhbbh 9y ago
Surely that simply means no one wants to be with you? Not sure why you’re blaming the concept of the dinner party.
toyg 9y ago
I think it’s the fear of being trapped with people you might not like and not being free to speak your mind. In a restaurant you can leave at any point with very small excuses; you can safely blame the cuisine if you don’t like it; and it’s a large environment with distractions, where one can simply “blend out” if he wants to. At somebody’s home the attention on each other is more intense, it’s a small and quieter environment, you can’t tell the host that his lasagna is terrible or his background music is atrocious, and it feels a bit offensive to leave early. This sort of thing is not an issue if people are close friends who can safely slag each others’ off, but in an increasingly globalised and atomised society the ratio of friends to acquaintances has decreased significantly, so gatherings probably tend to feel more formal.
icantdrive55 9y ago
Tell them there will be copious amounts of alcohol, no kids, and maybe mind expanding drugs. They will come like Zombies. Uber them home.
alphaoide 9y ago
You're friends are not introvert, are they? I say "Yes" more to those who seem to understand an introvert more. I say "No" more to those I don't have much in common. In my case, I say "Yes" more to invitation from techies than from sport lovers.
- deleted 9y ago
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- devdad 9y ago
  Why is this being downvoted? It seems that he identify as an introvert and gives his side to the story?

hvvhbbh 9y ago

Surely that simply means no one wants to be with you? Not sure why you’re blaming the concept of the dinner party.

toyg 9y ago

I think it’s the fear of being trapped with people you might not like and not being free to speak your mind. In a restaurant you can leave at any point with very small excuses; you can safely blame the cuisine if you don’t like it; and it’s a large environment with distractions, where one can simply “blend out” if he wants to. At somebody’s home the attention on each other is more intense, it’s a small and quieter environment, you can’t tell the host that his lasagna is terrible or his background music is atrocious, and it feels a bit offensive to leave early. This sort of thing is not an issue if people are close friends who can safely slag each others’ off, but in an increasingly globalised and atomised society the ratio of friends to acquaintances has decreased significantly, so gatherings probably tend to feel more formal.

icantdrive55 9y ago

Tell them there will be copious amounts of alcohol, no kids, and maybe mind expanding drugs. They will come like Zombies. Uber them home.

alphaoide 9y ago

You're friends are not introvert, are they? I say "Yes" more to those who seem to understand an introvert more. I say "No" more to those I don't have much in common. In my case, I say "Yes" more to invitation from techies than from sport lovers.

deleted 9y ago
[deleted]
devdad 9y ago
Why is this being downvoted? It seems that he identify as an introvert and gives his side to the story?