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My problem now, what makes me irate, is that the #metoo tag embodies this idea that, because so many women have been silent victims of harassment and assault, t
by sadlkfieiujjd 9y ago
My problem now, what makes me irate, is that the #metoo tag embodies this idea that, because so many women have been silent victims of harassment and assault, that any claim to harassment or assault somehow must be trustworthy because it is being openly stated.
I was listening to a program on NPR the other day, and the guest was somehow bemoaning the fact that when individuals make claims of being victimized, they are met with a reserved skepticism rather than accepting support.
What was totally missing from this discussion--what the host failed to challenge on--was that what this guest was proposing in fact was abandoning an innocent until proven guilty assumption in favor of a guilty until proven innocent assumption, which is dangerous and immoral. It is appropriate to be skeptical, because such a claim is very serious and potentially damaging. And such claims should be held up to rigorous scrutiny. I say this not without empathy for victims, being a victim of sexual assault myself, but as someone who has also seen how vicious and destructive these witchhunts can be.
I have a colleague who was wrongly accused of sexual assault (I know because I was essentially there and saw what actually transpired), and I've seen how completely destructive it can be personally and career-wise.
I also have been accused, through not-so-veiled insinuations (of course, not being explicit allowed her to sidestep any challenges, because there's nothing to actually challenge), of harassment by a vindictive ex who was jealous of my new relationship, and have seen what happens when colleagues, who you thought were friends, blindly accept these sorts of claims without looking into both sides of the story.
It's horrifying to watch this happen, and to me only undermines real victims by casting a shadow of doubt over their claims from others.
My experience is that this issue is far darker than anyone wants to acknowledge, and as much as there is problems with sexual assault, there are also problems with vindictive slander capitalizing on people's prejudices, to avoid personal responsibility. The horrific stories of Harvey Weinstein have turned into a witch-hunt against men that is equally horrifying en masse.
- deleted 9y ago[deleted]