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I hear that a lot, but I don't buy it. Fearing the failure itself is useful. If failure leads to awful consequences, fearing failure is a shortcut. If it doesn'

by jpttsn 9y ago

I hear that a lot, but I don't buy it. Fearing the failure itself is useful. If failure leads to awful consequences, fearing failure is a shortcut. If it doesn't lead to awful consequences, I'd rethink framing it as failure in the first place. I think I agree with your other point: that's sort of what I'm trying to say. If you know the risk/return of things, you're already in the clear. When you don't, you have four options.

quadrangle 9y ago
I think you're hung up on the semantics (which doesn't mean it's a non-issue, semantics do matter). When people talk about the problem with "fear of failure" they usually mean (at least I do myself) "failure" in the most plain and benign sense. If I am trying to sink a basketball in a basket and I miss, that's failure [to get the ball in the basket that time]. Fear of that failure is unhealthy, period. You seem to be using "failure" strictly for real problematic things and wouldn't even use the word in the case of a simple missed basketball shot. If "failure" as a word to you means something deeper and more profound, something usually associated with real fear-worthy consequences, then (using that semantic approach) the entire recommendation of "not fearing failure" would be reworded as "don't think of normal errors/mistakes as 'failures'". The point is that we agree that fear of fear-worthy consequences and even some buffer of fear of things that risk those consequences is good. That sort of fear is to be respected (even though it may sometimes come up inappropriately). I'm using "failure" in the literal sense where the vast majority of failures have NO connection to any consequences. And I'm using "fear" in the literal sense too. So, while I can have some concern about the possibility of my comment not coming across as clearly as I'd hope, I'm not literally scared to post it out of "fear of failure". Instead, I'm doing my best to be clear, having reasonably concern that drives my effort, and then willing to post and see whether I succeed at reaching you fully or fail to hit the bull's eye in this little thread. Fear of failure isn't needed or helpful here. Fear of failure specifically in a case where I'm discussing something really controversial that could lead to people wanting to rile up an online mob and dox me and ruin my life — that would be an online comment posting situation where the fear is warranted.

by jpttsn 9y ago

quadrangle 9y ago

I think you're hung up on the semantics (which doesn't mean it's a non-issue, semantics do matter). When people talk about the problem with "fear of failure" they usually mean (at least I do myself) "failure" in the most plain and benign sense. If I am trying to sink a basketball in a basket and I miss, that's failure [to get the ball in the basket that time]. Fear of that failure is unhealthy, period. You seem to be using "failure" strictly for real problematic things and wouldn't even use the word in the case of a simple missed basketball shot. If "failure" as a word to you means something deeper and more profound, something usually associated with real fear-worthy consequences, then (using that semantic approach) the entire recommendation of "not fearing failure" would be reworded as "don't think of normal errors/mistakes as 'failures'". The point is that we agree that fear of fear-worthy consequences and even some buffer of fear of things that risk those consequences is good. That sort of fear is to be respected (even though it may sometimes come up inappropriately). I'm using "failure" in the literal sense where the vast majority of failures have NO connection to any consequences. And I'm using "fear" in the literal sense too. So, while I can have some concern about the possibility of my comment not coming across as clearly as I'd hope, I'm not literally scared to post it out of "fear of failure". Instead, I'm doing my best to be clear, having reasonably concern that drives my effort, and then willing to post and see whether I succeed at reaching you fully or fail to hit the bull's eye in this little thread. Fear of failure isn't needed or helpful here. Fear of failure specifically in a case where I'm discussing something really controversial that could lead to people wanting to rile up an online mob and dox me and ruin my life — that would be an online comment posting situation where the fear is warranted.