3 ms·
I'm not trying to defend the people at your former org, but from an etiquette standpoint, it's a lot less awkward to give money to people in the wake of death o
by superb_herb 9y ago
I'm not trying to defend the people at your former org, but from an etiquette standpoint, it's a lot less awkward to give money to people in the wake of death or sudden grave illness (like cancer) rather than to give money to people suffering an ongoing condition like poverty or chronic illness.
Imagine a company holding fundraiser for Joe in accounting because he's poor.
That is simply not culturally acceptable, though it's likely the right thing to do.
- Mz 9y agoI quit that job to go live in a tent to get myself healthier. I was already a member of Hacker News when that happened. I joined the site while I still had a job at a Fortune 500 company. I was homeless for ~5.7 years. During that time, my goal was consistently to learn to make money online to support myself. People said shitty things to me like saying that I was "panhandling the internet." People pissed all over me, called me crazy, told me consistently to shut up about my problems, not because I was begging -- because I absolutely wasn't -- but because they had no plans to help me and it made them uncomfortable with the disconnect between what callous assholes they were and what nice people they imagined they were. A lot of people online knew of my plight. Most of them either did nothing to help me or actively pissed all over me. Meanwhile, I know of someone who joined Hacker News, networked, told everyone their sob story, got help pursuing their goals, was gifted money, etc. I never tried to use my sob story to manipulate people into giving me money. It works for some people. It isn't something I would ever do. I very much resent being accused of it. One of the problems appears to be that I am a woman. The ways in which that is a problem are complicated. But I am really tired of hearing all the excuses or explanations for why I need to understand why the entire world would like to tell me personally "Oh, fuck you. Feel free to die in the gutter. Also, stop making us aware of what assholes we are." I am really in no mood to listen to this kind of tripe from anyone. Your account is two days old. If you aren't trying to defend the people at my former org, then, you know, just don't. Don't come here and try to explain to me why it is okay for the entire world to have such a monstrous fuck you attitude towards me such that there is just no path forward, not even if I am willing to crawl naked across broken glass to get there. I spend a lot of time feeling suicidal over what I have learned about the monstrous heartlessness and callousness of the world in the last six years. I am not the type to go postal and go kill a bunch of people, but I certainly understand why that seems to be happening more and more here lately.
- superb_herb 9y agoThe entire world is not responsible for you, and is often cruel. It is very counterproductive to hold a chip on your shoulder for these perceived ills.
- Mz 9y agoNo, the entire world is not responsible for me. I am asking one person -- you -- to not behave like a callous jackass towards me personally in comments here. But, apparently that is asking too much, seeing as how you are doubling down rather than apologizing or shutting up.
- superb_herb 9y agoThere is no need for me to apologize or to shut up. But I do think you have gotten a bit too riled up over an internet discussion.