4 ms·
Tom, name made up, is a friend of mine. Sort of... I knew Tom for only a short while but I still write him letters and send him a few dollars every couple of we
by KGIII 9y ago
Tom, name made up, is a friend of mine. Sort of... I knew Tom for only a short while but I still write him letters and send him a few dollars every couple of weeks.
When Tom was just 18, he had finished school and was headed off to a large university on a sports scholarship. Not having any money, and coming from a poor family, he looked forward to this. It was going to be his big break.
But, Tom needed a wardrobe fit for a nice university. So, Tom went to the mall and proceeded to steal some clothing. Security tried to stop Tom so he pushed the security guard and ran away.
Tom, of course, went to jail. The DA offered Tom a 30 day sentence in a plea agreement and Tom, deciding his life was over, took a razor blade and cut his own throat.
Tom's 30 day sentence resulted in 10 years in a State mental hospital. Curiously, when he was released from the mental hospital, they still made him serve his 30 days.
Tom, now having nothing and a giant scar where normal skin once was, tried to meander through life as best as he could. This is where I met Tom. Tom loved drinking and doing drugs. His childhood years of experimentation had been lost to the system and Tom was making up for that. Tom and I had good times. I eventually moved on and no longer spent time with Tom. I'm not sure who was a worse influence on who, but that's immaterial and a story for another time.
One day, Tom had had enough. He just wasn't going to function and decided to end it all. He went down to the facility where he normally met his providers and took someone hostage. This, of course, resulted in the police being called.
Tom, for all his brilliance, was having none of it. The police came through the door and Tom attacked the first one through the door with his knife.
I'd like to say he put up a good fight, that he gave a good showing, and that he fought long and hard. No, he did no such thing. Cops being cops, Tom hadn't made it more than a couple of steps before they shot him.
Tom survived and is now back in that same State hospital. His letters tell me that he is even back in the same room. He expects to remain there for the rest of his life and likes to think he was sane, but just desperate, when the shoplifting occurred. He strongly suspects the system has made him even less sane and even more unstable. He seems to be okay with spending his life there.
All for some clothing to fit in at university...
- micheljones 9y agoAmerika, Amerika, the beautiful.
- KGIII 9y agoCoincidentally, the cop that shot him is the son of another friend of mine. We were in boot together and mostly stationed with each other. His son now has PTSD and no longer serves on the police force. I believe he is getting some sort of check and unexpected to return to the force. All for some clothing to fit in at university. What a tangled skein.
- CocaKoala 9y agoYou mention the clothing to fit in at university like that's the place where the story went all wrong, but 30 days in jail for shoplifting (which may or may not be an unreasonable sentence) is certainly not a life-ending affair, and definitely not something you should take a razor blade to your throat over. It seems like Tom was exhibiting some unstable behavior even before he got trapped in the system for 10 years; the clothes seem much more like a symptom than a cause here.
- kelnos 9y agoFrom Tom's perspective, that sentence may well have ended his life. The length of it was immaterial. I'm sure he would have lost his scholarship as a convicted felon, and his admissions offer might have been rescinded too. There goes college entirely. Most jobs would also become unavailable to him with a felony on his record. Likely he'd be hired by someone who'd exploit him because they'd know he was basically unemployable and couldn't get a job elsewhere. Meanwhile, he still has no money. Homelessness? Drugs? Petty (or worse) crime to feed and clothe himself? Back in the system at any rate, and unlikely to get back out.
- CocaKoala 9y ago> convicted felon You're probably correct that he would have lost the scholarship, but shoplifting is not a felony and if he's getting thirty days in jail, I don't think he's being convicted of a felony assault on the guard or something.
- tcj_phx 9y ago> He strongly suspects the system has made him even less sane and even more unstable. This is the core of Robert Whitaker's thesis: psychiatric medications take a episodic condition and make it chronic. Ref: anatomy of an epidemic (2010) In Psychiatrists Must Face Possibility That Medications Hurt More Than They Help, blogger John Horgan says the most recent studies seem to confirm Whitaker's hypothesis: https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/cross-check/psychiatrists-must-face-possibility-that-medications-hurt-more-than-they-help/ https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/cross-check/psychiatris...
- ddorian43 9y agoSorry buddy, but Tom was never "ok". You don't end your life for 30 days probation.
- mrguyorama 9y agoHaving experienced the desperation and sickness that is the desire to "end it all", it is one of the most far from "okay" states that exist. There is (very nearly) no healthy and justifiable reason to take your own life.