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In 1998 I passed all of the phone interviews to work at Lycos and they said all I had to do was come down they liked me so much I was certain to get the job. I

by gscott 16y ago

In 1998 I passed all of the phone interviews to work at Lycos and they said all I had to do was come down they liked me so much I was certain to get the job. I was really happy, I was trying to move up and get into the excitement but my wife didn't want to move from San Diego. Back then I thought marriage was an equal partnership but what I gave up was getting to a place where I could support my family. I never did much better then what I was doing before, I know I missed out on a life changing opportunity. Granted Lycos was no Yahoo or Google but it could have been the thing that moved me (my family) in a promising direction but I wasn't man enough to take charge.

qq66 16y ago
Or perhaps if you had "taken charge" you would have gotten caught up in the Silicon Valley startup mania, and done very well for yourself, but made your wife unhappy in leaving San Diego. Would it have been worth it?
- jorgeelo 16y ago
  If the wife's happiness is in a city instead with her husband, then he is not her happiness regardless to where they are. If marriage is a partnership, then both happiness worth the same, the argument of "does your dreams worth more or less than your wife" sounds more like a guilt trip. I made that mistake and I regret it.
  - qq66 16y ago
    What if his wife values living in San Diego as much as he values starting a company? Try this: "if a husband's happiness is with a startup instead of with his wife, she is not his happiness regardless of where he works."
  - gscott 16y ago
    My wife would not have left me over the move. I understand yours did but your wife was likely good looking and desirable. My wife is a little more average. I could have used some extra firepower for my resume, I ended up working for one company this entire time until about 8 months ago. I have spent a lot of years doing ASP Classic / SQL Server and find myself not very employable now. I have had to take a job making a cool $3,500 a month after being unemployed for 4 months. My wife's car was repossessed, I could no longer maintain her credit cards, and our electricity was shut off. None of those things made her happy either but she didn't choice but to accept them.

by gscott 16y ago

qq66 16y ago

Or perhaps if you had "taken charge" you would have gotten caught up in the Silicon Valley startup mania, and done very well for yourself, but made your wife unhappy in leaving San Diego. Would it have been worth it?

jorgeelo 16y ago
If the wife's happiness is in a city instead with her husband, then he is not her happiness regardless to where they are. If marriage is a partnership, then both happiness worth the same, the argument of "does your dreams worth more or less than your wife" sounds more like a guilt trip. I made that mistake and I regret it.
- qq66 16y ago
  What if his wife values living in San Diego as much as he values starting a company? Try this: "if a husband's happiness is with a startup instead of with his wife, she is not his happiness regardless of where he works."
- gscott 16y ago
  My wife would not have left me over the move. I understand yours did but your wife was likely good looking and desirable. My wife is a little more average. I could have used some extra firepower for my resume, I ended up working for one company this entire time until about 8 months ago. I have spent a lot of years doing ASP Classic / SQL Server and find myself not very employable now. I have had to take a job making a cool $3,500 a month after being unemployed for 4 months. My wife's car was repossessed, I could no longer maintain her credit cards, and our electricity was shut off. None of those things made her happy either but she didn't choice but to accept them.