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I'm not a believer of the "Tiger mother" stereotype, but I do believe that parents need to be strict, in that they set proper limits, follows their own examples
by Splines 9y ago
I'm not a believer of the "Tiger mother" stereotype, but I do believe that parents need to be strict, in that they set proper limits, follows their own examples, communicate consequences, and always, always, follow through on all commitments (whether it be a punishment or a promise to the child). This (imo) sets a high trustworthiness bar in the parent/child relationship, and gives room for that relationship to grow.
"Disciplined" may be a better word - it requires a high amount of willpower to pull this off, but it's part of what you signed up for.
- analog31 9y agoWhat if you are simply not a disciplined person with lots of willpower? (Then your kids are likely to also be undisciplined). This is not a hypothetical question. You can't send the kids back, and you might not know what kind of parent you're going to be until you have one or even more than one kid.
- liberte82 9y agoYou end up with shitty kids? This is the world and life. Not sure what your question is.
- emodendroket 9y agoFrankly I think the influence of this stuff can be overstated. Plenty of examples of people with middling parents who turned out fine or people with great, involved parents who really went off the rails.
- tpeo 9y agoYou can delegate their education to someone disciplined and with lots of willpower, if you're up to it. Mind you that, though you made a non-hypothetical question, this is a hypothetical and speculative answer. I'm not suggesting that you send your kids to military school. But it's interesting to think that a lot of parents might have already faced this problem in the past and that that might have been their solution to it.
- synicalx 9y agoI guess in that case you could explore other options - sports, cadets/scouts, martial arts etc could all potentially help a child develop discipline and willpower to some extent.