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During the peak of frothy VC investments, our hypothetical couch startup will have the money to hire ML and AI experts. 1) Sell the couch at a loss. 2) Acquir
by quuquuquu 9y ago
During the peak of frothy VC investments, our hypothetical couch startup will have the money to hire ML and AI experts.
1) Sell the couch at a loss.
2) Acquire customer voice data.
3) Run it through ML/AI
4) ????
5) Pivot the company.
- codedokode 9y agoYou can collect even more information: measure weight of a customer (so advertisers know who is more likely to buy food), learn how often he uses a couch.
- maxxxxx 9y agoYou could have some inflatable cushions that can only be controlled by the cloud.
- andrewflnr 9y agoIt'll recognize your voice and automatically port your cushion preferences to other people's SmartCouches.
- dsfyu404ed 9y agoI think either the company name or product line should be "SmartAss". Lots of good bad marketing opportunities that way.
- quuquuquu 9y agoGreat idea! This way when the company shuts down, your cushions are stuck in one position, unless you hotwire the couch :)
- KekDemaga 9y agoNot so fast hackerman, you'd be in violation of the DMCA should you hack the couch DRM.
- quuquuquu 9y agoWhat if I run a service that merely distributes instructions on how to "interact with" the couch DRM? Will I be tried for criminal charges outside the US, and then extrajudicially extradited from my home in Cambodia?? [1] [1]https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gottfrid_Svartholm https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gottfrid_Svartholm
- mattkevan 9y agoIn app purchases for additional per-seat licences! HealthKit integration! Share the data with your health insurer! "Uh-oh, you exceeded your sitting quota by xx hours this month, so you've been charged a penalty fee of $xx. Don't forget – keep moving to keep saving!" It's a world of opportunity...
- King-Aaron 9y agoBRB off to chat to the guys in product dev
- quuquuquu 9y agoSurely there must be a site that floats nuanced and well-formulated posts on satirical and utterly terrible start up ideas, right? I am sensing a market
- mattkevan 9y agoIf Juicero hadn't already existed we would have had to make it up?
- skykooler 9y agoSure! And we could use the same tech for other places where things need inflating, like airbags!
- maxxxxx 9y agoA cloud controlled airbag is brilliant! With enough ML and AI it may even detect a crash. Once you have that figured out you can apply the same technology to parachutes and life vests! This is truly disruptive.
- mattkevan 9y agoOnly as long as there's a persistent data connection. On losing signal they're programmed to instantly fire, just in case.
- reaperducer 9y agoDon't laugh. My wife has a pair of internet-connected couch pillows. (They're white, and have LEDs inside so you can change their color with an app.)
- codedokode 9y agoModern technology is so advanced that you cannot connect a phone to a pillow without using a server thousands miles away.
- SOLAR_FIELDS 9y agoAt least the worst that could happen aside from them being part of a botnet is that they turn into regular white pillows.
- HillaryBriss 9y agodon't forget the ecosystem. SitBit is building a competitive social relaxation tracker to pair with this couch.
- quuquuquu 9y agoWhy on earth have FitBit not cornered the competitive relaxation space
- HillaryBriss 9y agobecause we're already there. SitBit: we're not going anywhere.