5 ms·

There are no doubt some men who succeed fantastically in this environment, but it seems that for someone like me to do so, I would need to, very much, be consci

There are no doubt some men who succeed fantastically in this environment, but it seems that for someone like me to do so, I would need to, very much, be conscious of playing the game and pretty much doing anything but presenting an unashamed and straightforward version of self-expression. Since I consider it to be the core of my character to neither accept or deal out bullshit from anyone, but to seek the direct truth, this is a problem. If you have attitude that you're not going to make any changes to yourself in order to land women, than you're not going to land women. And why should women want to date you if your not willing to make the step? Women don't want direct and straightforward. They want charm, mystery, excitement. For one trite example, When I'm commenting on some nerdy web forum, and my girlfriend asks me what I'm doing, I don't say, "I'm chatting on a web forum." I say, "I'm engaging in correspondence" and paint the air of some sophisticated 19th century aristocrat. Or I say, "the same thing I do every night, sweetie, try and take over the world". When you can learn to dress up the mundane aspects of life with fun and charm, you'll find women enjoy being around you a lot more. I used to think "game" was just something for cad's and those who wanted only numbers and notches. But even the most cultured, educated, women wants to be charmed, she wants that psychologically dominant rogue to game her. If you want a great, long term affectionate companion, you need to develop both the personal rapport and shared interests, but also the romantic game/charm that makes her tingle for you.

WilliamLP 16y ago
> If you have attitude that you're not going to make any changes to yourself in order to land women, than you're not going to land women. I know! Such would be the definition of insanity and all that. That's why my future plans involve making the best of the strengths and weaknesses I have and who I am, who is someone who refuses to strive to be anybody but the person of my dreams. Women don't like me and I'll live. > Women don't want direct and straightforward. They want charm, mystery, excitement. I know that too. I've read the SS literature and heard Ross Jeffries tapes. The shit works. I don't like people who use it and it's not for me. Bullshit I can detect disgusts me, in both genders. I know the arguments quite well and I know human nature quite well. When you're learning a foreign language, you don't say "Speaking French isn't me" you make the sounds that seem weird at first. However, feeling like I need to spend my whole life making all my conversations with women crafted according to some stupid shit I don't actually feel isn't worth it for me. Yes I'm bitter, and I don't even rant all the time, just in this thread:) > you need to develop both the personal rapport and shared interests, but also the romantic game/charm that makes her tingle for you. Yes I know. But I say no to this, and the anger at the fact that the person of my dreams isn't good enough for a woman will drive me to more success, on my own terms.
- bokonist 16y ago
  Do you enjoy any sort of recreation, horsing around, pulling pranks, play acting, telling stories, fantasizing, scheming, etc? Or is your life 100% droll and serious? Do you have other interests besides programming - travel, books, movies, anything? You don't have to be a Jersey Shore-like, brainless, bullsh*tter to get girls. I think there is a difference between doing the Ross Jeffries act and spicing up topics you genuinely like with a little bit of excitement.
  - WilliamLP 16y ago
    > Do you enjoy any sort of recreation, horsing around, pulling pranks, play acting, telling stories, fantasizing, scheming, etc? Yes all of that, in a way that isn't appealing to women. The kind of humour I enjoy includes dry self deprecation and obscure and nerdy tech jokes, and I literally am part of the reason why women don't get into computer science jobs. You can actually see the repulsive magnetic fields lines as they form patterns at a distance from me at parties, not quite knowing why they need to move but doing so anyhow. And you know what? I have the personality of leader, and I'm going to develop myself into more of one, and women can just go to guys like you when they want to tingle and shit. > Do you have other interests besides programming - travel, books, movies, anything? No, a little (and I recognize where your usernane is from), yes if I'm sitting with a girl, and some other things that vary over time, including most that are stereotypically male interests. (E.g. I love watching UFC with friends at a bar.) But anyway, I apologize if it appears like I'm playing a version of Eric Berne's game "Why don't you...? yes but...", or ressentiment or glorifying my own powerlessness or whatever. I'm really not after help, though I recognize you and others would sincerely like to provide it. I'm just pointing out that online dating really isn't the best path for everyone, especially for someone like me. I really am likable to some, but I just take a long time to get to know, and it has to be in person over time, and it can't be the sort of whiny entitled women online who are smart enough to understand the economics of scarcity:) My own best strategy will be a two-pronged attack - make a ton more money and get a lot more power (in my view, this is more honest than clowning my way through some speed seduction value elicitation NLP bullshit that revolts me). And along with it get off the internet more and do some things where there is continual interaction with women. Sometimes, I know from experience, even though such things aren't that enjoyable at first, they can take on a life of their own... E.g. the idea that supposedly Sartre got into philosophy to pick up girls.
greendestiny 16y ago
Actually I think you're missing the point. Certainly he could actively engage in strategies that work in online dating, and doing so would increase his chances of success in getting dates through online dating sites. His point is that in doing so he plays a very different game to other dating environments - like amateur opera - and that the whole game is unpleasant and unappealing to him. That's pretty much the point of the original video as well. Self depreciation is actually quite charming - but I really doubt it would work in online dating. So if I was actually trying to give WilliamLP dating advice, it would be to find avenues more suited to his talents. But if we're discussing online dating I think I'd say the things it emphasizes and encourages are contrary to the things that find good compatible relationships.
- bugmenot 16y ago
  Self-deprecation
deleted 16y ago
[deleted]

WilliamLP 16y ago

> If you have attitude that you're not going to make any changes to yourself in order to land women, than you're not going to land women. I know! Such would be the definition of insanity and all that. That's why my future plans involve making the best of the strengths and weaknesses I have and who I am, who is someone who refuses to strive to be anybody but the person of my dreams. Women don't like me and I'll live. > Women don't want direct and straightforward. They want charm, mystery, excitement. I know that too. I've read the SS literature and heard Ross Jeffries tapes. The shit works. I don't like people who use it and it's not for me. Bullshit I can detect disgusts me, in both genders. I know the arguments quite well and I know human nature quite well. When you're learning a foreign language, you don't say "Speaking French isn't me" you make the sounds that seem weird at first. However, feeling like I need to spend my whole life making all my conversations with women crafted according to some stupid shit I don't actually feel isn't worth it for me. Yes I'm bitter, and I don't even rant all the time, just in this thread:) > you need to develop both the personal rapport and shared interests, but also the romantic game/charm that makes her tingle for you. Yes I know. But I say no to this, and the anger at the fact that the person of my dreams isn't good enough for a woman will drive me to more success, on my own terms.

bokonist 16y ago
Do you enjoy any sort of recreation, horsing around, pulling pranks, play acting, telling stories, fantasizing, scheming, etc? Or is your life 100% droll and serious? Do you have other interests besides programming - travel, books, movies, anything? You don't have to be a Jersey Shore-like, brainless, bullsh*tter to get girls. I think there is a difference between doing the Ross Jeffries act and spicing up topics you genuinely like with a little bit of excitement.
- WilliamLP 16y ago
  > Do you enjoy any sort of recreation, horsing around, pulling pranks, play acting, telling stories, fantasizing, scheming, etc? Yes all of that, in a way that isn't appealing to women. The kind of humour I enjoy includes dry self deprecation and obscure and nerdy tech jokes, and I literally am part of the reason why women don't get into computer science jobs. You can actually see the repulsive magnetic fields lines as they form patterns at a distance from me at parties, not quite knowing why they need to move but doing so anyhow. And you know what? I have the personality of leader, and I'm going to develop myself into more of one, and women can just go to guys like you when they want to tingle and shit. > Do you have other interests besides programming - travel, books, movies, anything? No, a little (and I recognize where your usernane is from), yes if I'm sitting with a girl, and some other things that vary over time, including most that are stereotypically male interests. (E.g. I love watching UFC with friends at a bar.) But anyway, I apologize if it appears like I'm playing a version of Eric Berne's game "Why don't you...? yes but...", or ressentiment or glorifying my own powerlessness or whatever. I'm really not after help, though I recognize you and others would sincerely like to provide it. I'm just pointing out that online dating really isn't the best path for everyone, especially for someone like me. I really am likable to some, but I just take a long time to get to know, and it has to be in person over time, and it can't be the sort of whiny entitled women online who are smart enough to understand the economics of scarcity:) My own best strategy will be a two-pronged attack - make a ton more money and get a lot more power (in my view, this is more honest than clowning my way through some speed seduction value elicitation NLP bullshit that revolts me). And along with it get off the internet more and do some things where there is continual interaction with women. Sometimes, I know from experience, even though such things aren't that enjoyable at first, they can take on a life of their own... E.g. the idea that supposedly Sartre got into philosophy to pick up girls.

greendestiny 16y ago

Actually I think you're missing the point. Certainly he could actively engage in strategies that work in online dating, and doing so would increase his chances of success in getting dates through online dating sites. His point is that in doing so he plays a very different game to other dating environments - like amateur opera - and that the whole game is unpleasant and unappealing to him. That's pretty much the point of the original video as well. Self depreciation is actually quite charming - but I really doubt it would work in online dating. So if I was actually trying to give WilliamLP dating advice, it would be to find avenues more suited to his talents. But if we're discussing online dating I think I'd say the things it emphasizes and encourages are contrary to the things that find good compatible relationships.

bugmenot 16y ago
Self-deprecation

deleted 16y ago

[deleted]