You aren't wrong, but (at the risk of stating an obvious strategy) perhaps you'd be happier in the long run investing that effort into making yourself an attrac

You aren't wrong, but (at the risk of stating an obvious strategy) perhaps you'd be happier in the long run investing that effort into making yourself an attractive match, instead of making a bad match bearable? Double-bonus in that investing in yourself leaves you better off & happy, with or without a match. Personal experience, after devoting my soul to my degree, I graduated a likable, intelligent, boring person. It took many years of purposefully expanding my horizons, to get beyond that.