I personally believe a lot of this can be learned like any other skill. You just need to approach it differently and actively, not passively. That said, I thin

I personally believe a lot of this can be learned like any other skill. You just need to approach it differently and actively, not passively. That said, I think it's slightly overrated, because most people don't even understand their own emotions, and some don't even allow themselves to talk about emotions/cry in presence of friends/other's. So if one doesn't even understand, allow or acknowledge his/her own feelings, how could one possibly begin to understand, observe or manipulate that in other's with accuracy. And actually that's not even fully true.. (this is why I think it can also be learned) Someone with anti-social disorder (sociopath), contrary to popular believe has the same emotions as everyone else. It's their empathy which is less/nonexistent. Yet they tend to be very good in picking up nuances in social settings and perform on them. A lot of it also depends on personality/upbringing. Parents who lie a lot to their children, potentially makes these children more apt in lying/bluffing and giving false trust themselves when they grow up, which is still a form off emotional intelligence, morality is a different aspect. Another example; One with social anxiety could very well have a high emotional intelligence. They naturally spend way more time focusing on nuances of themselves as well as other's, as the innate fear will push their thoughts constantly (with all due respect to people who experience this) So almost ironically they might be socially less present, but probably spot true feelings far faster and more precise than people who are more "in the moment". * a small anecdote* I spend a few years giving music lessons, and I told a student I could teach him to just hear the music then be able to play it by ear. They almost all said "I am not born with good ears". I began to pick a guitar and play a few notes off a famous song. They recognized it as anyone would. Then I played a song but played wrong notes randomly. He didn't spot the first one, but then he noticed. I asked him, how did u know the song and recognize the wrong notes if your ears are shit? he laughed. Thing is, our senses are all very good, everyone can hear when singers are out off tune, anyone can recognize a person by a voice or most songs by melody. You just need to learn which sound fits which spot on the guitar, like pictures to words. The hearing, just like empathy, or sight and smell for that matter is there, or will naturally develop if actively used, and more efficient with added knowledge and guidance.