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Agreed. Frankly I should think that many Muslims would find this entire notion offensive. Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want

Agreed. Frankly I should think that many Muslims would find this entire notion offensive. Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want to find a muslim partner (b) have family with backward and regressive views (c) live in a society with backward and regressive views (d) want to support the continuation of backward and regressive views IMHO in many traditional societies young people want to shake off the controlling habits of former generations and such an app would actually be a concrete step backwards. (Full disclosure: My wife is Chinese muslim, and we have muslim friends in Australia, India, Indonesia, Thailand, Tunisia, UK, etc. I am personally irreligious.)

yomly 9y ago
And on the other hand I know plenty of people who would love something like this. Different strokes for different folks.
computerex 9y ago
> (b) have family with backward and regressive views (c) live in a society with backward and regressive views (d) want to support the continuation of backward and regressive views Wait, what are you implying here? A dating site exclusive to Muslims isn't suggestive of B, C or D. There are dating sites exclusive to African Americans for example, are they backwards and regressive too?
- contingencies 9y ago
  A dating site exclusive to Muslims isn't suggestive of B, C or D Sure, but the features listed elsewhere in this thread that they've chosen to implement are.
  - computerex 9y ago
    What features are you referring to specifically?
- intoverflow2 9y ago
  Not defending the words of the poster you are quoting but African American is a race not a religion/belief system. Dating app for Mormons or Atheists would be a more appropriate analogy.
  - dragonwriter 9y ago
    All identities are beliefs, as are all concepts of race; an identity tied to a concept of race is absolutely a belief system. > Dating app for Mormons or Atheists would be a more appropriate analogy. Of course, both of those exist, too.
    - whywhywhywhy 9y ago
      Babies are not born with beliefs they can't change. But they are born with a race they can't change. It's not the same.
      - dragonwriter 9y ago
        Races aren't objective facts of biology they are mutable social constructs (both in terms of identity and ascribed status.) It's true that you can't directly control (though you can influence)) ascribed racial status (the rest of society collectively does that) but, that's true of all ascribed statuses (including ascribed religion, though that's often not significant in modern Western societies.)
        whywhywhywhy 9y ago
        TIL being Chinese isn't an objective fact it's something you can stop being true if raised in the right society. By this logic white people raised in certain parts of America are African Americans.
    - deleted 9y ago
      [deleted]
dragonwriter 9y ago
> Frankly I should think that many Muslims would find this entire notion offensive. Many people find anything offensive, but I don't see any particularly good reason to think there is anything particularly deserving of it in this concept. > Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want to find a muslim partner I would think that even Muslims who do not want exclusively to find a Muslim partner would recognize that there are Muslims who do wish that. > IMHO in many traditional societies young people want to shake off the controlling habits of former generations and such an app would actually be a concrete step backwards. Allowing people who don't share their open attitude toward dating he opportunity to have a dating forum that supports their preferences does not prevent those with open attitudes from pursuing more open venues, which are not in short supply. Christian Mingle doesn't stop Christians that whose dating interested isn't religiously restrictive from using any of the vast area of open-preference dating apps in the universe, the Muslim equivalent would be no different in that regard.
- bogomipz 9y ago
  >"Many people find anything offensive, but I don't see any particularly good reason to think there is anything particularly deserving of it in this concept." Except that arranged marriage is still common in Muslim society. See the section: "Islamic dating practices and community programs": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islamic_marital_practices https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islamic_marital_practices and see: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=95683604 http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=9568360...
  - dragonwriter 9y ago
    > Except that arranged marriage is still common in Muslim society. I fail to see how the fact that arranged marriage remains common in Muslim society is germane to the point that sentence is offered in response to or even the wider discussion of this app, except insofar as both arranged marriages and the existing structures which support it are an incumbent factor which any dating app targeting that population necessarily must contend with.
Chris2048 9y ago
> Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want to find a muslim partner I thought the religion required it? What is a "muslim" in this case?
- bogomipz 9y ago
  I don't believe there is anything in the in the religion that requires it and that interfaith unions are acceptable provided they are between Ahl al-Kitab("People of the Book) - Jews, Christian and Zoroastrians.
  - shakkhar 9y ago
    This is actually correct. But where I come from, this is frowned upon. The real problem is not the religious doctrine, but the practical problem of resolving cultural conflicts between the families.
  - Chris2048 9y ago
    What is the standard for deciding if something is "in the religion"? Can a Muslim woman marry a Christian man?
    - bogomipz 9y ago
      By "in the religion" I meant put forth in the Quran. I don't believe its reciprocal in that a Muslim woman a may not marry a Christian man unless he converts. See: https://www.britannica.com/topic/Ahl-al-Kitab https://www.britannica.com/topic/Ahl-al-Kitab

yomly 9y ago

And on the other hand I know plenty of people who would love something like this. Different strokes for different folks.

computerex 9y ago

> (b) have family with backward and regressive views (c) live in a society with backward and regressive views (d) want to support the continuation of backward and regressive views Wait, what are you implying here? A dating site exclusive to Muslims isn't suggestive of B, C or D. There are dating sites exclusive to African Americans for example, are they backwards and regressive too?

contingencies 9y ago
A dating site exclusive to Muslims isn't suggestive of B, C or D Sure, but the features listed elsewhere in this thread that they've chosen to implement are.
- computerex 9y ago
  What features are you referring to specifically?
intoverflow2 9y ago
Not defending the words of the poster you are quoting but African American is a race not a religion/belief system. Dating app for Mormons or Atheists would be a more appropriate analogy.
- dragonwriter 9y ago
  All identities are beliefs, as are all concepts of race; an identity tied to a concept of race is absolutely a belief system. > Dating app for Mormons or Atheists would be a more appropriate analogy. Of course, both of those exist, too.
  - whywhywhywhy 9y ago
    Babies are not born with beliefs they can't change. But they are born with a race they can't change. It's not the same.
    - dragonwriter 9y ago
      Races aren't objective facts of biology they are mutable social constructs (both in terms of identity and ascribed status.) It's true that you can't directly control (though you can influence)) ascribed racial status (the rest of society collectively does that) but, that's true of all ascribed statuses (including ascribed religion, though that's often not significant in modern Western societies.)
      - whywhywhywhy 9y ago
        TIL being Chinese isn't an objective fact it's something you can stop being true if raised in the right society. By this logic white people raised in certain parts of America are African Americans.
  - deleted 9y ago
    [deleted]

dragonwriter 9y ago

> Frankly I should think that many Muslims would find this entire notion offensive. Many people find anything offensive, but I don't see any particularly good reason to think there is anything particularly deserving of it in this concept. > Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want to find a muslim partner I would think that even Muslims who do not want exclusively to find a Muslim partner would recognize that there are Muslims who do wish that. > IMHO in many traditional societies young people want to shake off the controlling habits of former generations and such an app would actually be a concrete step backwards. Allowing people who don't share their open attitude toward dating he opportunity to have a dating forum that supports their preferences does not prevent those with open attitudes from pursuing more open venues, which are not in short supply. Christian Mingle doesn't stop Christians that whose dating interested isn't religiously restrictive from using any of the vast area of open-preference dating apps in the universe, the Muslim equivalent would be no different in that regard.

bogomipz 9y ago
>"Many people find anything offensive, but I don't see any particularly good reason to think there is anything particularly deserving of it in this concept." Except that arranged marriage is still common in Muslim society. See the section: "Islamic dating practices and community programs": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islamic_marital_practices https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Islamic_marital_practices and see: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=95683604 http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=9568360...
- dragonwriter 9y ago
  > Except that arranged marriage is still common in Muslim society. I fail to see how the fact that arranged marriage remains common in Muslim society is germane to the point that sentence is offered in response to or even the wider discussion of this app, except insofar as both arranged marriages and the existing structures which support it are an incumbent factor which any dating app targeting that population necessarily must contend with.

Chris2048 9y ago

> Just because someone is Muslim doesn't mean they (a) necessarily want to find a muslim partner I thought the religion required it? What is a "muslim" in this case?

bogomipz 9y ago
I don't believe there is anything in the in the religion that requires it and that interfaith unions are acceptable provided they are between Ahl al-Kitab("People of the Book) - Jews, Christian and Zoroastrians.
- shakkhar 9y ago
  This is actually correct. But where I come from, this is frowned upon. The real problem is not the religious doctrine, but the practical problem of resolving cultural conflicts between the families.
- Chris2048 9y ago
  What is the standard for deciding if something is "in the religion"? Can a Muslim woman marry a Christian man?
  - bogomipz 9y ago
    By "in the religion" I meant put forth in the Quran. I don't believe its reciprocal in that a Muslim woman a may not marry a Christian man unless he converts. See: https://www.britannica.com/topic/Ahl-al-Kitab https://www.britannica.com/topic/Ahl-al-Kitab