4 ms·

I read a recent account on the net in a NSFW forum written by a woman who wanted to have casual sex with a co-worker on a business trip. She gave several very

I read a recent account on the net in a NSFW forum written by a woman who wanted to have casual sex with a co-worker on a business trip. She gave several very obvious hints to the guy she was interested in with no response. She finally had to resort to flashing her boobs at the guy to get him to acknowledge and fulfill her desires. Me personally, it would take that level of chutzpah from a female co-worker before I'd even consider and I still might be worried about the whole thing ending badly. Kind of funny where we're at with male/female relationship dynamics these days.

gjjrfcbugxbhf 9y ago
If the genders were reversed then that would be sexual harassment...
- narrator 9y ago
  This is actually an interesting legal problem. How would two * willing * co-workers initiate casual sex on a business trip? Certainly this situation has cropped up before! Neither would want to risk their careers on making an unwanted advance toward the other! Presenting a coworker with a long legal document giving consent to be propositioned, signed with a notary present of course, wouldn't work. It would be sexual harassment to even present the contract for consideration! They would have to use something like Tinder where they could be both unaware of the others interest until both parties had signed the legal agreement consenting to be propositioned by the other. They would then be directed to do some sort of custom secret society hand sign in the others presence to verify that they had actually consented. The hand sign would be innocuous when seen by someone who hadn't actually signed the contract via the app and seen the secret hand sign the other would display to acknowledge they had signed the contract. The next billion dollar startup idea?! A cross between Linkedin, LegalZoom and Tinder. The idea would at least make for a hilarious episode of "The IT Crowd" or "Silicon Valley".
  - _pmf_ 9y ago
    > The next billion dollar startup idea?! A cross between Linkedin, LegalZoom and Tinder. Well, there has been this Slack app[0]. [0] https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/05/slack-doesnt-want-people-using-it-for-romance/525975/ https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/05/slack...
- sundvor 9y ago
  How is that not sexual harassment? (Full stop).
- marvin 9y ago
  Wow, I'm normally pretty sensitive to "this would look bad if the genders were reversed", but I missed this one even though it is absolutely ridiculous and should be obvious. "He gave several very obvious hints to the woman he was interested in with no response. He finally had to resort to flashing his muscled chest at the woman to get her to acknowledge and fulfill his desires."
- sidlls 9y ago
  I consider it sexual harassment as it is written. The victim's gender matters in the sense that harassment is more likely against women due to the patriarchal character of our culture, but men can still be victims of sexual harassment. They just very rarely ever are.
  - gjjrfcbugxbhf 9y ago
    > They just very rarely ever are. Or they rarely report it (partly because they afraid they won't be believed)?
dkersten 9y ago
Indeed. I think the likelihood is high that if I were given obvious hints by a female coworker, I would probably not pick up on them, because to me, coworkers are off limits[1]. If a coworker were interested in me, she would probably have to actually say it to me outright or I'd brush it off as a joke/over friendliness/me misinterpreting the situation or something like that. [1] I don't like the idea of coworkers dating because if they break up, it can be messy and cause all sorts of problems for them and for their other coworkers. Having said that, if I really liked a coworker and she was interested in me, I probably wouldn't let that stand in my way either, but it is something I'm conscious about. If she were on my team, I would at least ask to move to another team.

gjjrfcbugxbhf 9y ago

If the genders were reversed then that would be sexual harassment...

narrator 9y ago
This is actually an interesting legal problem. How would two * willing * co-workers initiate casual sex on a business trip? Certainly this situation has cropped up before! Neither would want to risk their careers on making an unwanted advance toward the other! Presenting a coworker with a long legal document giving consent to be propositioned, signed with a notary present of course, wouldn't work. It would be sexual harassment to even present the contract for consideration! They would have to use something like Tinder where they could be both unaware of the others interest until both parties had signed the legal agreement consenting to be propositioned by the other. They would then be directed to do some sort of custom secret society hand sign in the others presence to verify that they had actually consented. The hand sign would be innocuous when seen by someone who hadn't actually signed the contract via the app and seen the secret hand sign the other would display to acknowledge they had signed the contract. The next billion dollar startup idea?! A cross between Linkedin, LegalZoom and Tinder. The idea would at least make for a hilarious episode of "The IT Crowd" or "Silicon Valley".
- _pmf_ 9y ago
  > The next billion dollar startup idea?! A cross between Linkedin, LegalZoom and Tinder. Well, there has been this Slack app[0]. [0] https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/05/slack-doesnt-want-people-using-it-for-romance/525975/ https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/05/slack...
sundvor 9y ago
How is that not sexual harassment? (Full stop).
marvin 9y ago
Wow, I'm normally pretty sensitive to "this would look bad if the genders were reversed", but I missed this one even though it is absolutely ridiculous and should be obvious. "He gave several very obvious hints to the woman he was interested in with no response. He finally had to resort to flashing his muscled chest at the woman to get her to acknowledge and fulfill his desires."
sidlls 9y ago
I consider it sexual harassment as it is written. The victim's gender matters in the sense that harassment is more likely against women due to the patriarchal character of our culture, but men can still be victims of sexual harassment. They just very rarely ever are.
- gjjrfcbugxbhf 9y ago
  > They just very rarely ever are. Or they rarely report it (partly because they afraid they won't be believed)?

dkersten 9y ago

Indeed. I think the likelihood is high that if I were given obvious hints by a female coworker, I would probably not pick up on them, because to me, coworkers are off limits[1]. If a coworker were interested in me, she would probably have to actually say it to me outright or I'd brush it off as a joke/over friendliness/me misinterpreting the situation or something like that. [1] I don't like the idea of coworkers dating because if they break up, it can be messy and cause all sorts of problems for them and for their other coworkers. Having said that, if I really liked a coworker and she was interested in me, I probably wouldn't let that stand in my way either, but it is something I'm conscious about. If she were on my team, I would at least ask to move to another team.