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The HN take-away: Behind what looks like a success could actually be a failure. (And probably vice-versa.)

by sivers 16y ago

chime 16y ago
Absolutely true, especially the vice-versa part. Everyone's definition of success is different. Others may think you are a failure based on this post, while thinking you were a success based on almost every other post. Their perception of your success or failure should not change whether you feel successful or not. The only thing that matters is whether you yourself feel successful or not. If not (having read your blog for a while), I'm certain you're on the way to change things around. And yes, big changes are awesome. Took me almost a year to change my work/school situation but now I'm finally happy about how things are going to be.
- hoprocker 16y ago
  The "vice-versa" part is an important life lesson. Walk to a freeway onramp w/ a rucksack on your back and stick out your thumb, you'll probably meet some fascinating people. Quit what seems like a safe job, travel a bit, land in a different city, and see what you can do there - at the worst, you'll find something differently stimulating. The fear of change is never based on certainty, just on an inverse relationship with one's own flexibility. And I'd wager that, generally speaking, the more flexible, the better.
cageface 16y ago
Also, make sure you're pursuing your own definition of success and not one you picked up from somebody else: http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_philosophy_of_success.html http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_ph... (De Botton's books on these and similar subjects are worth a read)
edanm 16y ago
For anyone that didn't click-through to it, Derek links to his favorite fable, which is well worth a read (one of my favorites too). http://sivers.org/horses http://sivers.org/horses He also wrote a song about that fable which is great, check it out here: http://sivers.org/mp3/DEREK_SIVERS-Still_Too_Soon_to_Tell-1998-08.mp3 http://sivers.org/mp3/DEREK_SIVERS-Still_Too_Soon_to_Tell-19...
l0stman 16y ago
Thanks for sharing this, it was extremely brave of you to do so. Speaking of one's failures in public requires a high degree of courage. Besides, from reading your other posts on HN, I thought you were what I would generally consider a successful guy. But like you said, there's always a flip side in every situation.

The HN take-away: Behind what looks like a success could actually be a failure. (And probably vice-versa.)

by sivers 16y ago

The HN take-away: Behind what looks like a success could actually be a failure. (And probably vice-versa.)

chime 16y ago

Absolutely true, especially the vice-versa part. Everyone's definition of success is different. Others may think you are a failure based on this post, while thinking you were a success based on almost every other post. Their perception of your success or failure should not change whether you feel successful or not. The only thing that matters is whether you yourself feel successful or not. If not (having read your blog for a while), I'm certain you're on the way to change things around. And yes, big changes are awesome. Took me almost a year to change my work/school situation but now I'm finally happy about how things are going to be.

hoprocker 16y ago
The "vice-versa" part is an important life lesson. Walk to a freeway onramp w/ a rucksack on your back and stick out your thumb, you'll probably meet some fascinating people. Quit what seems like a safe job, travel a bit, land in a different city, and see what you can do there - at the worst, you'll find something differently stimulating. The fear of change is never based on certainty, just on an inverse relationship with one's own flexibility. And I'd wager that, generally speaking, the more flexible, the better.

cageface 16y ago

Also, make sure you're pursuing your own definition of success and not one you picked up from somebody else: http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_philosophy_of_success.html http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_ph... (De Botton's books on these and similar subjects are worth a read)

edanm 16y ago

For anyone that didn't click-through to it, Derek links to his favorite fable, which is well worth a read (one of my favorites too). http://sivers.org/horses http://sivers.org/horses He also wrote a song about that fable which is great, check it out here: http://sivers.org/mp3/DEREK_SIVERS-Still_Too_Soon_to_Tell-1998-08.mp3 http://sivers.org/mp3/DEREK_SIVERS-Still_Too_Soon_to_Tell-19...

l0stman 16y ago

Thanks for sharing this, it was extremely brave of you to do so. Speaking of one's failures in public requires a high degree of courage. Besides, from reading your other posts on HN, I thought you were what I would generally consider a successful guy. But like you said, there's always a flip side in every situation.