5 ms·

>"It’s making people less generous and chivalrous,” Ms. Pennoyer said. “It used to be you’d go to a restaurant, and you’d put down your credit cards and split i

>"It’s making people less generous and chivalrous,” Ms. Pennoyer said. “It used to be you’d go to a restaurant, and you’d put down your credit cards and split it 50-50, even if one person had steak and one had chicken. But now people pay exactly to the cent." Spoken like the person who always orders steak. I don't drink, so I'm always irritated when I go out to dinner with a bunch of people and someone says "let's just split the tab evenly. It's too much trouble to figure it all out." Since drinks are so expensive relative to food either I speak up and look like the jerk or end up paying much more than I should.

technofiend 9y ago
The infamous "unpopular subsidy of Wally's lobster" Dilbert cartoon covers this, although we had a coworker at my last job who took it to the next level. We'd go to lunch and this guy would wait for everyone else to chip in their money (tip included) and then he'd see how much was left, claiming he didn't have change for a $20. But I noticed he was taking enough change back that all the tip money was subsidizing his lunch. So even if the waitress started with $20 in tips she ended up with $5 when Rick was done. The next time we went to lunch and he conveniently didn't have change, I pulled out a stack of 100 $1 bills. I don't know if they do it any more but you could get them brand new and glued to a spine (called gluebacked). It's trivial to peel off exactly how many dollars you need. That stopped Rick's trying to steal the tips to pay for his lunch. I think was embarrassed that someone had actually noticed what he was up to and prepared for it. But yeah I don't mind Venmo after getting skunked by friends who wanted to equally split the bill at a tapas restaurant. It made sense since we would be sharing little plates of food. So we agreed up front and then the two of them proceeded to drink everyone else under the table because of course the bill was subsidized. I'm usually generous and forgiving about these things, according to my wife to a fault. But for someone who doesn't drink at all to suddenly have their evening's cost doubled is no bueno. I absolutely refuse to equally split the bill if people are going to drink even if it makes me look cheap. Now drinking in England is different - everyone's expected to pick up rounds and it's equally distributed. But sheesh trying to make people (particularly those that don't as a rule drink) pick up the majority of your drinking tab is just rude.
- technofiend 9y ago
  Hopefully it's OK to reply to my own post just to correct it and name the reference as the parent post to my reply is no longer editable - "unpopular subsidy of Wally's salmon" - http://dilbert.com/strip/1995-05-11 http://dilbert.com/strip/1995-05-11 Mea culpa on not checking my reference earlier.
majormajor 9y ago
I don't drink, and rarely have the most expensive entree, and hate it when people try to figure out the exact perfect split of a check. It somehow always takes longer than it should, if we're all friends here making roughly the same amount, let's just split it evenly. Dining out with friends isn't solely about turning dollars into calories.
- lotsofpulp 9y ago
  Considering everyone has a very capable calculator in their pocket, notebook, and camera in their pocket, it's quite easy to figure out your share. You can simply note how much your meal and drinks cost, add the tax and tip, and drop it in the middle as cash at the end. If you go out often (2+ every one to two weeks), don't drink alcohol ($10+ per drink in NYC/SF, prob even $15+), and you don't eat meat (+15% I bet on average for a dish), and don't get dessert ($10+), why on earth should you be putting in an extra $20 to $50 more per meal? Why would I accept that from someone I consider a friend, or a guest?
- gozur88 9y ago
  The theory behind splitting the check evenly is if you go out a bunch of times it all evens out. But that doesn't happen if you split the bar tab over non-drinkers.

technofiend 9y ago

The infamous "unpopular subsidy of Wally's lobster" Dilbert cartoon covers this, although we had a coworker at my last job who took it to the next level. We'd go to lunch and this guy would wait for everyone else to chip in their money (tip included) and then he'd see how much was left, claiming he didn't have change for a $20. But I noticed he was taking enough change back that all the tip money was subsidizing his lunch. So even if the waitress started with $20 in tips she ended up with $5 when Rick was done. The next time we went to lunch and he conveniently didn't have change, I pulled out a stack of 100 $1 bills. I don't know if they do it any more but you could get them brand new and glued to a spine (called gluebacked). It's trivial to peel off exactly how many dollars you need. That stopped Rick's trying to steal the tips to pay for his lunch. I think was embarrassed that someone had actually noticed what he was up to and prepared for it. But yeah I don't mind Venmo after getting skunked by friends who wanted to equally split the bill at a tapas restaurant. It made sense since we would be sharing little plates of food. So we agreed up front and then the two of them proceeded to drink everyone else under the table because of course the bill was subsidized. I'm usually generous and forgiving about these things, according to my wife to a fault. But for someone who doesn't drink at all to suddenly have their evening's cost doubled is no bueno. I absolutely refuse to equally split the bill if people are going to drink even if it makes me look cheap. Now drinking in England is different - everyone's expected to pick up rounds and it's equally distributed. But sheesh trying to make people (particularly those that don't as a rule drink) pick up the majority of your drinking tab is just rude.

technofiend 9y ago
Hopefully it's OK to reply to my own post just to correct it and name the reference as the parent post to my reply is no longer editable - "unpopular subsidy of Wally's salmon" - http://dilbert.com/strip/1995-05-11 http://dilbert.com/strip/1995-05-11 Mea culpa on not checking my reference earlier.

majormajor 9y ago

I don't drink, and rarely have the most expensive entree, and hate it when people try to figure out the exact perfect split of a check. It somehow always takes longer than it should, if we're all friends here making roughly the same amount, let's just split it evenly. Dining out with friends isn't solely about turning dollars into calories.

lotsofpulp 9y ago
Considering everyone has a very capable calculator in their pocket, notebook, and camera in their pocket, it's quite easy to figure out your share. You can simply note how much your meal and drinks cost, add the tax and tip, and drop it in the middle as cash at the end. If you go out often (2+ every one to two weeks), don't drink alcohol ($10+ per drink in NYC/SF, prob even $15+), and you don't eat meat (+15% I bet on average for a dish), and don't get dessert ($10+), why on earth should you be putting in an extra $20 to $50 more per meal? Why would I accept that from someone I consider a friend, or a guest?
gozur88 9y ago
The theory behind splitting the check evenly is if you go out a bunch of times it all evens out. But that doesn't happen if you split the bar tab over non-drinkers.