I'm not saying you can't maintain a close relationship with a little distance. But first and foremost, there's a big difference between you yourself traveling

I'm not saying you can't maintain a close relationship with a little distance. But first and foremost, there's a big difference between you yourself traveling 2 hours each way (to work) and you, your spouse, and 2.5 children traveling 2 hours each way. Getting kids ready & keeping them entertained for a 10 minute drive is bad enough. And it's insane to say four hours of travel time isn't limiting. You maintain a close relationship, sure, see them often, sure. But do you stop by just for lunch or dinner? Do you see them during the week, or just on weekends? Do you go to the same church, are your kids in the same softball league? If the kids are sick and need someone to watch them during the day, do you drop them off with grandpa or do you take a day off work? The point of having a 2 hour commute is so that you can live where you want to spend most of your time. If you want to spend most of your time 15 minutes from your office, great. If you have somewhere else you'd rather spend most of your time, it makes sense to live there, so that by default, there you are.