8 ms·

He sounds twice exceptional -- gifted, but with some sort of learning disability or handicap of some sort. Twice exceptional people often appear to be "average

by Mz 9y ago

He sounds twice exceptional -- gifted, but with some sort of learning disability or handicap of some sort. Twice exceptional people often appear to be "average" but find an "average" or normal life enormously frustrating. Because of having some sort of handicap, it can take a lot to get them going. Once they get going, they often outperform others. Life is vastly better for them when they can create their own niche because they simply do not fit in to normal societal expectations very well, try though they might. No insult intended. I fit that profile, as do both my sons. So, perhaps a good summary is if you are bright, but having trouble finding your niche, then starting your own company is a means to create your own niche. This is exactly what I have always told my oldest son. From an early age, it was clear to me he would not make a good employee. But that doesn't mean he won't eventually be successful. He just needs to grow his own.

jansho 9y ago
Your posts always resonate with me, thank you, but I particularly need to hear this one. I will not call myself exceptional, but I often find fitting in almost impossible. Finding a niche and owning it is then survival! Although I'm very aware of the high failure rate with startups, I can't help but keep believing that I can do this thing. Sometimes though I am torn by guilt, that I'm such a snowflake, but I don't know, one thing I know for sure is that if I don't give it a shot, I will regret for the rest of my life. And that is much more unbearable.
- Mz 9y ago
  It might help to think of yourself as enriching the diverse ecosystem of humans in order to enhance life for all. In nature, monocultures are horribly vulnerable to disease and other problems. In contrast, diverse ecosystems mean that one creature's wastes are another's nutrients and many creatures can co-exist because they aren't direct competitors. They need inherently different things. Taking up some niche no one else wants means you aren't in competition with others and you add life to spaces that would otherwise be dead. There is zero reason humans should all strive to fit the same mold and many reasons to be horrified by the idea.
  - rralian 9y ago
    > In contrast, diverse ecosystems mean that one creatures wastes are another's nutrients Wow. This is so insightful. When applying this lense to one's failures or struggles or disappointments... this really clicked with me to put it all in perspective. Thank you!
- btown 9y ago
  Find a cofounder. Someone you respect and trust, who will fill the gaps in the skills outside your niche. The great startup ideas that can be built by one person, no matter how talented, are largely taken now imo. But for a duo or team, the sky is the limit, because each can retreat to their niche when necessary and know the world will keep going.
- icelancer 9y ago
  "Exceptional" does not always have to mean "excellent," if you are worried about being immodest. It can also mean - and was originally meant to mean - irregular, not typical. So use it, if it fits!
R_haterade 9y ago
This was something I've really needed to hear. Thank you, and good luck to you and your sons!
deepGem 9y ago
Twice exceptional people often appear to be "average" but find an "average" or normal life enormously frustrating Like all correlation to causation misconceptions, most people read this and imply the converse. I find the normal life exceptionally frustrating, so I must be exceptional, hence I must do a startup. I am questioning if this is indeed true. I believe that this is a misconception, being frustrated with day to day life doesn't make one exceptional. Getting out of that frustration and finding something that they can be less frustrated with, perhaps makes people exceptional. One can just be frustrated with day to day life purely because of laziness, for instance.
- freyir 9y ago
  > I find the normal life exceptionally frustrating, so I must be exceptional Isn't this just the mantra of the millennial?
  - Arlene90 9y ago
    Start making cash right now... Get more time with your family by doing j0bs that only require for you to have a computer and an internet access and you can have that at your home. Start bringing up to $8624 a month.I've started this j0b and I've never been happier and now I am sharing it with you, so you can try it too. You can check it out here… ...........https://is.gd/qKRnJt https://is.gd/qKRnJt
  - richthegeek 9y ago
    The mantra of the millennial is more like "Sure I might have no job prospects, no money, no home, a ruined environment, and a boss that treats me like crap .... but it'll be better once all the selfish old people die"
    - eli_gottlieb 9y ago
      "Sure, I might be deep in debt, I'll never afford permanent housing, the government's gone fascist, and the biosphere's ability to support human life is rapidly collapsing, but at least I've got a scone while the world burns."
King-Aaron 9y ago
Example cases: Richard Branson, John Chambers (Cisco), Ingvar Kamprad (Ikea), Henry Ford (GM or something), Bill Hewlett (HP co-founder)... All these guys were dyslexic and achieved fairly exceptional things.
- andy_ppp 9y ago
  This isn't intended as snarky but after listening to the "You Are No So Smart" podcast [1] for a few months now, seeing these sort of examples my mind immediately goes to Confirmation Bias [2] and that use of inductive reasoning like this cannot be trusted. [1] https://youarenotsosmart.com/podcast/ https://youarenotsosmart.com/podcast/ [2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias
  - King-Aaron 9y ago
    I didn't see the comment as snarky :) I'd argue however that those examples were just examples of others succeeding even though they had a limiting factor, not evidence to say that a reduced learning capacity is going to guarantee success haha.
    - andy_ppp 9y ago
      Even so, if you are suggesting dyslexia (in these cases) probably has or probably hasn't affected outcomes, that's problematic. The examples you give provide zero information either way; without enumerating a statistically relevant section of people considered successful, these examples seem to provide information, but actually provide nothing. You'd also have to adjust for other factors such as parents trying harder to find areas (other than academia) where dyslexic children can consider themselves successful. It's almost intractable to think of a study that could remove these correlations from any statistically relevant top level study...
      - King-Aaron 9y ago
        It was just a bit of Thursday inspirational fluff, not really intended to be used as part of the 'social implications of saying positive things on the internet' study.
dalbasal 9y ago
Well put. The emphasis in this title is on the I. A startup path has some unusual/extreme features (eg high risk, gatekeepers or gates...) that make it a poor fit for many/most people, even if it's a good fit for the above reasons. It would be great if we could get some of that flexibility to create your own niche, outside of Capital-S Startups. For a relatively shallow example, consider the whole open plan debate that re-opens periodically on HN. Some people want X. Others want Y. All insist they are many times happier and more productive with the right setup. It's clear from looking at people's home office setup that individuals will put a lot more time, effort & money into a work environment that they control themselves.
lomnakkus 9y ago
This article is selling a narrative that you want to hear with a huge dollop of confirmation bias as andy_ppp points out. It's not very likely that you or your family are that 0.01%[1], but it is very likely that you think you are exceptional. (I wish you all and your family all the best, but one needs to be very careful around this kind of narrativium.) [1] Made up number, obviously.
- diegoperini 9y ago
  This cannot be stressed enough. Well said.
- jasode 9y ago
  A meta observation around the reaction to the word "exceptional" based on some posters' comments: - lomnakkus: "It's not very likely that you or your family are that 0.01%[1], but it is very likely that you think you are exceptional." - deepGem: ", being frustrated with day to day life doesn't make one exceptional." I think the problem here is that Mz's chosen word of "exceptional" makes it look like a superior attribute and self-aggrandizement. (This triggers a reaction: https://i.redd.it/1sd91qydx16z.gif https://i.redd.it/1sd91qydx16z.gif) So it seems like the word "exceptional" has too much positive connotation and that in turn triggers some to "knock the poster down a few pegs". Can we find an alternative word that doesn't trigger that reflex? For whatever reason(s), a lot of entrepreneurs can't seem to conform to the typical 9-to-5 job. Maybe it is: - ADD/ADHD - DRD2 "thrill seeking" gene[1] - mild sociopathic disorder[2] - rule-maker or rule-breaker personality instead of rule-follower - <some other dominant attribute> Whatever the cause is, don't label it "exceptional" because it will lead to replies correcting you that "you're not exceptional". How about another word such as "misfits"? If you're a person that sees no compatibility for careers such as programmer for BigCo, or doctor, or accountant, or teacher, etc, you'd self-diagnose yourself as a "misfit". Those careers are all noble endeavors -- but they also all feel "wrong" to the misfit. In a conformist-economy, the paths for the misfit earning a living is very different: If you're a "creative misfit", you can write novels or be in a rock band and people overlook your eccentricities. If you're not artistic but see business opportunities, you become an entrepreneur. Is there a better word than "misfit" that captures the spirit above but is also sufficiently self-effacing to not make people think one has a superiority complex? [1] https://www.google.com/search?q=drd2+gene+entrepreneur https://www.google.com/search?q=drd2+gene+entrepreneur [2] http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.2162-6057.1987.tb00477.x/abstract http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.2162-6057.1987....
harel 9y ago
I totally agree with you. And although my two sons are too young to accurately observe this on them, I can tell you I fit the bill. I can manage on the 'fixed path', working in a company that has a plan sorted out, but I feel constrained and frustrated. I see rules as something nice but that has to be allowed to be broken when its the right thing to do. So I did do my start up journeys. A few times over the last 20 years and I'm still at it. I have never, however, heard it explained in that manner as to WHY I feel most comfortable when the odds are stacked against me and when I'm doomed and expected to fail. I revel in those moment as i know its my time to spark up and deliver. And when things get routine my light seem to dim... Until the next 'crisis'.
dr_ 9y ago
He went to Yale. He's definitely not average or with a learning disability.
- Mz 9y ago
  Temple Grandin has a PhD and has Autism. Stephen Hawking is wheelchair-bound and famous as a genius in his field. Going to Yale is not proof positive that he has no learning disability or other handicap. He talks about failing to initially qualify for the gifted program in school and working to make it happen, then continuing to push. This is what fits the "looks average, but isn't" pattern common for 2xe types. When I was active in the online gifted community, it was well known that the higher the IQ, the more likely it was that someone also had OCD, ADHD, Asperger's or similar. This was so common that some people referred to such conditions as "comorbidities" of giftedness, in part for lack of a better word, in part because these were support groups for parents of gifted kids. Because they were support groups, it was an environment where people complained a lot about the downside of being smart, which, among other things, tends to come with a boatload of social BS that is incredibly unpleasant.
  - dr_ 9y ago
    Perhaps people who are characterized as such - ADHD, Aspergers (remember these are diagnoses made on observation,there are no lab tests to diagnose them) are in a learning environment that is not conducive to promoting their underlying talent. Perhaps it's the education system that needs change, and not the pupil. If so, we may see fewer of these diagnoses. I don't know temple grandin, but hawking certainly didn't have a learning disorder.
    - Mz 9y ago
      And my original comment indicated learning disability or other handicap. My handicap is medical, not a learning disability.
cryoshon 9y ago
a better term than 2X is "blessed but cursed" sugarcoating learning disabilities / other life-ruining disabilities is a trick that people use when they can't confront the excessively negative reality: most geniuses with LD die in obscurity after being outrageously frustrated with life. once in a great while, we learn about them long after they're dead and appreciate their works. but usually not.
voidhorse 9y ago
Exceptional people are often exceptional because they don't spend time worrying about whether or not they are exceptional or classifiable as such. Find a problem, a passion, and love it. Forget yourself. The moment you're convinced you're some sort of 'type' it's over. You'll set up ridiculous expectations, founded on nothing, and defeat yourself at every impasse because you aren't fitting the type/persona/image you've crafted for yourself. It's good to have small, concrete goals. It's bad to have hopes. Or at least that's my experience. And it takes a long time to crawl out of the ravine of disappointment and frustration that sort of attitude eventually creates. Leave the needless typifying, categorizing, and psychologizing to the psychologists. So many people seem to think they just need to correctly identify what kind or type of human being they are--oh I'm a INFJ, PB&J or whatever--and they'll have figured it all out. It doesn't work like that. That's just a desire for the easy way out. Truth is there is no easy answer. Localized contingencies and circumstances way beyond your own control shape who you are and your opportunities. Existence precedes essence, as Sartre might say. You are, though the same as everyone else, also unrepeatable. For the Greeks, one wasn't a genius, one was lucky enough to have a genius. Furthermore, everyone had a little bit of genius following them around. I think there's some benefits to decoupling ability and the ego in that manner--some benefit in placing our gifts, once more, in the hands of the gods. Don't sweat it.
- Mz 9y ago
  Exceptional people are often exceptional because they don't spend time worrying about whether or not they are exceptional or classifiable as such. People who have a disability generally benefit from getting a proper diagnosis. Twice exceptional people often have terrible self esteem problems due to a long track record of failing to perform as well as they expect of themselves and as well as others around them expect of them. Learning that they actually are smart, but also have a handicap, is often life changing in a very positive way. Getting proper accommodation for the handicap can be incredibly empowering and allow them to start hitting some of the marks they have long desired, but kept failing to reach.
40acres 9y ago
You seem to be very knowledgeable in regards to the twice exceptional theory. This may be confirmation bias but I feel as if I fall somewhere on the spectrum. What do you suggest for an adult who may be 2e? What online resources have you come across in terms of helping to "diagnose" and deal with this?
- Mz 9y ago
  This is a general clearing house of gifted info: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/ http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/ This is their 2xe page: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/what_is_2e.htm http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/what_is_2e.htm I will suggest that you consider joining a gifted homeschoolers list. I would not know what a good one is currently because it has been a lot of years since I did that stuff. But parents homeschooling a gifted child are very often dealing with a 2xe kid. Most school systems are ill equipped to deal with a 2xe kid. In fact, they often have trouble acknowledging that such a thing exists. (The schools ID'd one of my sons as gifted and the other as special needs, but they are both 2xe. The school system couldn't even conceive of such a thing, it seems.) Parents on such lists often personally get a lot out of trying to understand what is going on with their kid and how to best support them. They often find themselves having big epiphanies about their own life and coming to terms with some things. If you lurk, you will be privy to good discussions and find out what the current hot resources are and which ones have remained timeless classics that never go out of style. That is probably the best way to get some kind of useful info if you want to "self diagnose." It may also be okay for you to ask about adult assessment on some lists. Some gifted lists are not just for parents, but are more general. That would probably be a better place than a homeschooling list to ask about adult assessment. Adult assessment is fraught with difficulties. If you aren't trying to get formal accommodation at college or at your job, I fully support a plan to "self diagnose" in order to try to figure yourself out. But do be aware that if you self diagnose and then want to talk about it online, an awful lot of people will be immediately dismissive, no matter your reasons for trying to engage and no matter how carefully you frame it. So self diagnosing can be useful for personal insight, which can be very valuable, but without a formal diagnosis, you won't qualify for official accommodation from work, school or other institutions and most people, online or off, will be pretty unsympathetic, if not downright ugly about it. Best.

by Mz 9y ago

jansho 9y ago

Your posts always resonate with me, thank you, but I particularly need to hear this one. I will not call myself exceptional, but I often find fitting in almost impossible. Finding a niche and owning it is then survival! Although I'm very aware of the high failure rate with startups, I can't help but keep believing that I can do this thing. Sometimes though I am torn by guilt, that I'm such a snowflake, but I don't know, one thing I know for sure is that if I don't give it a shot, I will regret for the rest of my life. And that is much more unbearable.

Mz 9y ago
It might help to think of yourself as enriching the diverse ecosystem of humans in order to enhance life for all. In nature, monocultures are horribly vulnerable to disease and other problems. In contrast, diverse ecosystems mean that one creature's wastes are another's nutrients and many creatures can co-exist because they aren't direct competitors. They need inherently different things. Taking up some niche no one else wants means you aren't in competition with others and you add life to spaces that would otherwise be dead. There is zero reason humans should all strive to fit the same mold and many reasons to be horrified by the idea.
- rralian 9y ago
  > In contrast, diverse ecosystems mean that one creatures wastes are another's nutrients Wow. This is so insightful. When applying this lense to one's failures or struggles or disappointments... this really clicked with me to put it all in perspective. Thank you!
btown 9y ago
Find a cofounder. Someone you respect and trust, who will fill the gaps in the skills outside your niche. The great startup ideas that can be built by one person, no matter how talented, are largely taken now imo. But for a duo or team, the sky is the limit, because each can retreat to their niche when necessary and know the world will keep going.
icelancer 9y ago
"Exceptional" does not always have to mean "excellent," if you are worried about being immodest. It can also mean - and was originally meant to mean - irregular, not typical. So use it, if it fits!

R_haterade 9y ago

This was something I've really needed to hear. Thank you, and good luck to you and your sons!

deepGem 9y ago

Twice exceptional people often appear to be "average" but find an "average" or normal life enormously frustrating Like all correlation to causation misconceptions, most people read this and imply the converse. I find the normal life exceptionally frustrating, so I must be exceptional, hence I must do a startup. I am questioning if this is indeed true. I believe that this is a misconception, being frustrated with day to day life doesn't make one exceptional. Getting out of that frustration and finding something that they can be less frustrated with, perhaps makes people exceptional. One can just be frustrated with day to day life purely because of laziness, for instance.

freyir 9y ago
> I find the normal life exceptionally frustrating, so I must be exceptional Isn't this just the mantra of the millennial?
- Arlene90 9y ago
  Start making cash right now... Get more time with your family by doing j0bs that only require for you to have a computer and an internet access and you can have that at your home. Start bringing up to $8624 a month.I've started this j0b and I've never been happier and now I am sharing it with you, so you can try it too. You can check it out here… ...........https://is.gd/qKRnJt https://is.gd/qKRnJt
- richthegeek 9y ago
  The mantra of the millennial is more like "Sure I might have no job prospects, no money, no home, a ruined environment, and a boss that treats me like crap .... but it'll be better once all the selfish old people die"
  - eli_gottlieb 9y ago
    "Sure, I might be deep in debt, I'll never afford permanent housing, the government's gone fascist, and the biosphere's ability to support human life is rapidly collapsing, but at least I've got a scone while the world burns."

King-Aaron 9y ago

Example cases: Richard Branson, John Chambers (Cisco), Ingvar Kamprad (Ikea), Henry Ford (GM or something), Bill Hewlett (HP co-founder)... All these guys were dyslexic and achieved fairly exceptional things.

andy_ppp 9y ago
This isn't intended as snarky but after listening to the "You Are No So Smart" podcast [1] for a few months now, seeing these sort of examples my mind immediately goes to Confirmation Bias [2] and that use of inductive reasoning like this cannot be trusted. [1] https://youarenotsosmart.com/podcast/ https://youarenotsosmart.com/podcast/ [2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias
- King-Aaron 9y ago
  I didn't see the comment as snarky :) I'd argue however that those examples were just examples of others succeeding even though they had a limiting factor, not evidence to say that a reduced learning capacity is going to guarantee success haha.
  - andy_ppp 9y ago
    Even so, if you are suggesting dyslexia (in these cases) probably has or probably hasn't affected outcomes, that's problematic. The examples you give provide zero information either way; without enumerating a statistically relevant section of people considered successful, these examples seem to provide information, but actually provide nothing. You'd also have to adjust for other factors such as parents trying harder to find areas (other than academia) where dyslexic children can consider themselves successful. It's almost intractable to think of a study that could remove these correlations from any statistically relevant top level study...
    - King-Aaron 9y ago
      It was just a bit of Thursday inspirational fluff, not really intended to be used as part of the 'social implications of saying positive things on the internet' study.

dalbasal 9y ago

Well put. The emphasis in this title is on the I. A startup path has some unusual/extreme features (eg high risk, gatekeepers or gates...) that make it a poor fit for many/most people, even if it's a good fit for the above reasons. It would be great if we could get some of that flexibility to create your own niche, outside of Capital-S Startups. For a relatively shallow example, consider the whole open plan debate that re-opens periodically on HN. Some people want X. Others want Y. All insist they are many times happier and more productive with the right setup. It's clear from looking at people's home office setup that individuals will put a lot more time, effort & money into a work environment that they control themselves.

lomnakkus 9y ago

This article is selling a narrative that you want to hear with a huge dollop of confirmation bias as andy_ppp points out. It's not very likely that you or your family are that 0.01%[1], but it is very likely that you think you are exceptional. (I wish you all and your family all the best, but one needs to be very careful around this kind of narrativium.) [1] Made up number, obviously.

diegoperini 9y ago
This cannot be stressed enough. Well said.
jasode 9y ago
A meta observation around the reaction to the word "exceptional" based on some posters' comments: - lomnakkus: "It's not very likely that you or your family are that 0.01%[1], but it is very likely that you think you are exceptional." - deepGem: ", being frustrated with day to day life doesn't make one exceptional." I think the problem here is that Mz's chosen word of "exceptional" makes it look like a superior attribute and self-aggrandizement. (This triggers a reaction: https://i.redd.it/1sd91qydx16z.gif https://i.redd.it/1sd91qydx16z.gif) So it seems like the word "exceptional" has too much positive connotation and that in turn triggers some to "knock the poster down a few pegs". Can we find an alternative word that doesn't trigger that reflex? For whatever reason(s), a lot of entrepreneurs can't seem to conform to the typical 9-to-5 job. Maybe it is: - ADD/ADHD - DRD2 "thrill seeking" gene[1] - mild sociopathic disorder[2] - rule-maker or rule-breaker personality instead of rule-follower - <some other dominant attribute> Whatever the cause is, don't label it "exceptional" because it will lead to replies correcting you that "you're not exceptional". How about another word such as "misfits"? If you're a person that sees no compatibility for careers such as programmer for BigCo, or doctor, or accountant, or teacher, etc, you'd self-diagnose yourself as a "misfit". Those careers are all noble endeavors -- but they also all feel "wrong" to the misfit. In a conformist-economy, the paths for the misfit earning a living is very different: If you're a "creative misfit", you can write novels or be in a rock band and people overlook your eccentricities. If you're not artistic but see business opportunities, you become an entrepreneur. Is there a better word than "misfit" that captures the spirit above but is also sufficiently self-effacing to not make people think one has a superiority complex? [1] https://www.google.com/search?q=drd2+gene+entrepreneur https://www.google.com/search?q=drd2+gene+entrepreneur [2] http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.2162-6057.1987.tb00477.x/abstract http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.2162-6057.1987....

harel 9y ago

I totally agree with you. And although my two sons are too young to accurately observe this on them, I can tell you I fit the bill. I can manage on the 'fixed path', working in a company that has a plan sorted out, but I feel constrained and frustrated. I see rules as something nice but that has to be allowed to be broken when its the right thing to do. So I did do my start up journeys. A few times over the last 20 years and I'm still at it. I have never, however, heard it explained in that manner as to WHY I feel most comfortable when the odds are stacked against me and when I'm doomed and expected to fail. I revel in those moment as i know its my time to spark up and deliver. And when things get routine my light seem to dim... Until the next 'crisis'.

dr_ 9y ago

He went to Yale. He's definitely not average or with a learning disability.

Mz 9y ago
Temple Grandin has a PhD and has Autism. Stephen Hawking is wheelchair-bound and famous as a genius in his field. Going to Yale is not proof positive that he has no learning disability or other handicap. He talks about failing to initially qualify for the gifted program in school and working to make it happen, then continuing to push. This is what fits the "looks average, but isn't" pattern common for 2xe types. When I was active in the online gifted community, it was well known that the higher the IQ, the more likely it was that someone also had OCD, ADHD, Asperger's or similar. This was so common that some people referred to such conditions as "comorbidities" of giftedness, in part for lack of a better word, in part because these were support groups for parents of gifted kids. Because they were support groups, it was an environment where people complained a lot about the downside of being smart, which, among other things, tends to come with a boatload of social BS that is incredibly unpleasant.
- dr_ 9y ago
  Perhaps people who are characterized as such - ADHD, Aspergers (remember these are diagnoses made on observation,there are no lab tests to diagnose them) are in a learning environment that is not conducive to promoting their underlying talent. Perhaps it's the education system that needs change, and not the pupil. If so, we may see fewer of these diagnoses. I don't know temple grandin, but hawking certainly didn't have a learning disorder.
  - Mz 9y ago
    And my original comment indicated learning disability or other handicap. My handicap is medical, not a learning disability.

cryoshon 9y ago

a better term than 2X is "blessed but cursed" sugarcoating learning disabilities / other life-ruining disabilities is a trick that people use when they can't confront the excessively negative reality: most geniuses with LD die in obscurity after being outrageously frustrated with life. once in a great while, we learn about them long after they're dead and appreciate their works. but usually not.

voidhorse 9y ago

Exceptional people are often exceptional because they don't spend time worrying about whether or not they are exceptional or classifiable as such. Find a problem, a passion, and love it. Forget yourself. The moment you're convinced you're some sort of 'type' it's over. You'll set up ridiculous expectations, founded on nothing, and defeat yourself at every impasse because you aren't fitting the type/persona/image you've crafted for yourself. It's good to have small, concrete goals. It's bad to have hopes. Or at least that's my experience. And it takes a long time to crawl out of the ravine of disappointment and frustration that sort of attitude eventually creates. Leave the needless typifying, categorizing, and psychologizing to the psychologists. So many people seem to think they just need to correctly identify what kind or type of human being they are--oh I'm a INFJ, PB&J or whatever--and they'll have figured it all out. It doesn't work like that. That's just a desire for the easy way out. Truth is there is no easy answer. Localized contingencies and circumstances way beyond your own control shape who you are and your opportunities. Existence precedes essence, as Sartre might say. You are, though the same as everyone else, also unrepeatable. For the Greeks, one wasn't a genius, one was lucky enough to have a genius. Furthermore, everyone had a little bit of genius following them around. I think there's some benefits to decoupling ability and the ego in that manner--some benefit in placing our gifts, once more, in the hands of the gods. Don't sweat it.

Mz 9y ago
Exceptional people are often exceptional because they don't spend time worrying about whether or not they are exceptional or classifiable as such. People who have a disability generally benefit from getting a proper diagnosis. Twice exceptional people often have terrible self esteem problems due to a long track record of failing to perform as well as they expect of themselves and as well as others around them expect of them. Learning that they actually are smart, but also have a handicap, is often life changing in a very positive way. Getting proper accommodation for the handicap can be incredibly empowering and allow them to start hitting some of the marks they have long desired, but kept failing to reach.

40acres 9y ago

You seem to be very knowledgeable in regards to the twice exceptional theory. This may be confirmation bias but I feel as if I fall somewhere on the spectrum. What do you suggest for an adult who may be 2e? What online resources have you come across in terms of helping to "diagnose" and deal with this?

Mz 9y ago
This is a general clearing house of gifted info: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/ http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/ This is their 2xe page: http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/what_is_2e.htm http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/what_is_2e.htm I will suggest that you consider joining a gifted homeschoolers list. I would not know what a good one is currently because it has been a lot of years since I did that stuff. But parents homeschooling a gifted child are very often dealing with a 2xe kid. Most school systems are ill equipped to deal with a 2xe kid. In fact, they often have trouble acknowledging that such a thing exists. (The schools ID'd one of my sons as gifted and the other as special needs, but they are both 2xe. The school system couldn't even conceive of such a thing, it seems.) Parents on such lists often personally get a lot out of trying to understand what is going on with their kid and how to best support them. They often find themselves having big epiphanies about their own life and coming to terms with some things. If you lurk, you will be privy to good discussions and find out what the current hot resources are and which ones have remained timeless classics that never go out of style. That is probably the best way to get some kind of useful info if you want to "self diagnose." It may also be okay for you to ask about adult assessment on some lists. Some gifted lists are not just for parents, but are more general. That would probably be a better place than a homeschooling list to ask about adult assessment. Adult assessment is fraught with difficulties. If you aren't trying to get formal accommodation at college or at your job, I fully support a plan to "self diagnose" in order to try to figure yourself out. But do be aware that if you self diagnose and then want to talk about it online, an awful lot of people will be immediately dismissive, no matter your reasons for trying to engage and no matter how carefully you frame it. So self diagnosing can be useful for personal insight, which can be very valuable, but without a formal diagnosis, you won't qualify for official accommodation from work, school or other institutions and most people, online or off, will be pretty unsympathetic, if not downright ugly about it. Best.