Uber would totally be worth 70 Billion as an Alphabet subsidiary, but there's no way Alphabet would acquire it for that price. Put Susan Wocjicki in charge of U

Uber would totally be worth 70 Billion as an Alphabet subsidiary, but there's no way Alphabet would acquire it for that price. Put Susan Wocjicki in charge of Uber, and have her pull a Stephen Elop routine to drive down Uber's valuation to something Alphabet can afford. Then just rebrand the whole thing as Waymo.