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While sitting in his open office with another employee next to me my boss, the owner of the company, bellowed at me "If I were 30 years younger, I'd jump over t

While sitting in his open office with another employee next to me my boss, the owner of the company, bellowed at me "If I were 30 years younger, I'd jump over this table and fuck you!" I laughed. Two months later I received my bonus; the day after that I gave notice. That comment wasn't the worst thing he had said or done to me. That also wasn't the first time I had been harassed at work. In the beginning it was a little exhausting because I felt I should stick it out - perhaps as some sort psychological rite of passage. However, I eventually learned the easy way to deal with it. Don't fight. Don't argue. Just leave. There are men and women who deal with harassment everyday gracefully. The tech industry is so expansive and filled with opportunity that the moment I feel an employer doesn't have my back, I know I can split and not care. I don't know why more people don't see it the same way.

kevincrane 9y ago
> Don't fight. Don't argue. Just leave. There are men and women who deal with harassment everyday gracefully. That's a horrifically regressive view on this. Why should the person being harassed have to leave? Why can't the person doing the harassing be forced out? And saying that leaving quietly is "handling it gracefully" puts the entire burden on the victim, as if not just graciously accepting someone's sexual advances is causing a nuisance to the rest of the company. If you expect all women who are the victims of sexual harassment to leave their jobs without making a fuss, you can't be surprised when people write long thinkpieces on the software industry is lacking in female representation.
- araglia 9y ago
  No, it's a self-efficacious view. I never see myself as a victim. There is no burden. And that's where I can't see eye-to-eye with you on your thoughts. I've gotten tired of the thinkpieces and the people who write them. They're not doing anything but writing sanctimonious bullshit from their ivory tower. I take action. Whether you think leaving a toxic workplace quietly is not an acceptable response, then that's your opinion.
  - lern_too_spel 9y ago
    Perhaps Rosa Parks should have just gone to the back of the bus instead of making a sanctimonious bullshit fuss. That sanctimonious bullshit from the ivory tower is the reason that things are as good as they are today relative to yesterday, as bad as things still are today.

kevincrane 9y ago

> Don't fight. Don't argue. Just leave. There are men and women who deal with harassment everyday gracefully. That's a horrifically regressive view on this. Why should the person being harassed have to leave? Why can't the person doing the harassing be forced out? And saying that leaving quietly is "handling it gracefully" puts the entire burden on the victim, as if not just graciously accepting someone's sexual advances is causing a nuisance to the rest of the company. If you expect all women who are the victims of sexual harassment to leave their jobs without making a fuss, you can't be surprised when people write long thinkpieces on the software industry is lacking in female representation.

araglia 9y ago
No, it's a self-efficacious view. I never see myself as a victim. There is no burden. And that's where I can't see eye-to-eye with you on your thoughts. I've gotten tired of the thinkpieces and the people who write them. They're not doing anything but writing sanctimonious bullshit from their ivory tower. I take action. Whether you think leaving a toxic workplace quietly is not an acceptable response, then that's your opinion.
- lern_too_spel 9y ago
  Perhaps Rosa Parks should have just gone to the back of the bus instead of making a sanctimonious bullshit fuss. That sanctimonious bullshit from the ivory tower is the reason that things are as good as they are today relative to yesterday, as bad as things still are today.