It's a "dialect" (sort of) of Ocaml, with all of the beauty that is its type system and Functor (not thing.map, parameterized modules!) that can compile to Java

It's a "dialect" (sort of) of Ocaml, with all of the beauty that is its type system and Functor (not thing.map, parameterized modules!) that can compile to JavaScript via Bucklescript.