3 ms·

Over the last couple years, I've been exploring this. I can't provide any answers, but I've found all the usual recommendations useful. CBT, Watts, Stoicism,

Over the last couple years, I've been exploring this. I can't provide any answers, but I've found all the usual recommendations useful. CBT, Watts, Stoicism, yoga, mindfulness. Of those, the last -- mindfulness -- has been the most crucial. I cannot usually control my reaction to stimulus, but the hardest part for me (and in others, now that I observe them) is the identification of the event trigger. Once you identify what causes things to happen[0], it's much much much easier to adjust the behavior. The event notifier pattern has been most useful for me. [0] after all, it's kind of ridiculous that a bad incident in traffic will affect my interaction with a colleague.

sharkweek 9y ago
Mindfulness, despite the recent buzzword-iness of it, has been an amazing tool for me. When I'm feeling any number of negative emotions (anger, anxiety, stress, etc.), or when my OCD flares up, it helps so much to simply pause, turn and face the emotion, address it, and say to myself "I am feeling this way because..." and calling out the trigger. It almost takes the teeth out of the negative feeling, making it pass a lot sooner. Sounds a little hippy-dippy, sure, but for me it falls into the "it just works" bucket.
- nvarsj 9y ago
  Sounds like CBT! Other things I've found that help is more sleep, and less caffeine. It's not talked about much, but I'm convinced caffeine exacerbates the kind of negative emotions and anxiety that affect us perfectionists. I don't quite have the willpower to give it up, though.
  - nf05papsjfVbc 9y ago
    I can not give up good coffee as long as I have access to good roasters and an espresso machine. However, I will freely concede that caffeine does indeed seem to heighten feelings of anxiety. On days when something unpleasant is on my mind, it makes it worse. On the other hand, it helps me start the day by doing something for myself - making good coffee. I enjoy the process and at the moment, making bad days worse is a price I gladly pay for it.
  - aktenlage 9y ago
    After very regularly drinking 1-3 cups of coffee per day for about 8 years, I stopped for the six weeks of this years fasting period. After a few days of headache and tiredness things normalized. I expected a big difference (whatsoever) but was underwhelmed. There might have been a positive effect of not drinking coffee, but I didn't notice anything significant.

sharkweek 9y ago

Mindfulness, despite the recent buzzword-iness of it, has been an amazing tool for me. When I'm feeling any number of negative emotions (anger, anxiety, stress, etc.), or when my OCD flares up, it helps so much to simply pause, turn and face the emotion, address it, and say to myself "I am feeling this way because..." and calling out the trigger. It almost takes the teeth out of the negative feeling, making it pass a lot sooner. Sounds a little hippy-dippy, sure, but for me it falls into the "it just works" bucket.

nvarsj 9y ago
Sounds like CBT! Other things I've found that help is more sleep, and less caffeine. It's not talked about much, but I'm convinced caffeine exacerbates the kind of negative emotions and anxiety that affect us perfectionists. I don't quite have the willpower to give it up, though.
- nf05papsjfVbc 9y ago
  I can not give up good coffee as long as I have access to good roasters and an espresso machine. However, I will freely concede that caffeine does indeed seem to heighten feelings of anxiety. On days when something unpleasant is on my mind, it makes it worse. On the other hand, it helps me start the day by doing something for myself - making good coffee. I enjoy the process and at the moment, making bad days worse is a price I gladly pay for it.
- aktenlage 9y ago
  After very regularly drinking 1-3 cups of coffee per day for about 8 years, I stopped for the six weeks of this years fasting period. After a few days of headache and tiredness things normalized. I expected a big difference (whatsoever) but was underwhelmed. There might have been a positive effect of not drinking coffee, but I didn't notice anything significant.