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Some people are born communicators and find interaction with others completely intuitive. Others are born with a brain more ready to understand math, or writin

by i336_ 9y ago

Some people are born communicators and find interaction with others completely intuitive. Others are born with a brain more ready to understand math, or writing screenplays, or software engineering, or business management - and bumble their way through communication, getting a lot wrong, not knowing where the lines are between their successes and failures, and generally having a miserable time. Books like these define specific scopes to focus on as worth investing time and energy in, with the promise that understanding in these areas will definitely bring reward, as unintuitive as this may seem [to these people]. I wouldn't mind similar ones that explain learning how to learn, on a related note.

aisofteng 9y ago
You imply that emotional intelligence and reasoning ability are a tradeoff. They aren't.
- i336_ 9y ago
  Woops, that was unintentional. Although... now I think about it... when I'm anxious (I have reasonably mild but fairly broadly scoped anxiety), I can become more emotional/instinctive/reactive to things, and my ability to reason can be greatly impacted as well. So I do think there is some indirect correlation, in practice.
  - watwut 9y ago
    Emotional intelligence does not imply that you are driven by emotions. It imply that you understand them, which makes it easier to control how you react. Someone who is emotional is not displaying emotional intelligence at that moment.
    - i336_ 9y ago
      I definitely agree with you there. Often when I feel certain ways, I don't have reference points to mentally articulate how I'm feeling - if I even have the ability to consciously distinguish the feeling and highlight it. That shuts down a lot of internal dialog and analysis before it has the chance to take place. When I'm anxious, my thinking is clouded across the board, which makes this weakness all the more apparent. I wonder if there are any books out there that specifically help to instil an understanding of the nuances in emotional processing.
- Joeri 9y ago
  Even if they are orthogonal, they are less likely to occur in the same person than either apart.
afarrell 9y ago
> learning how to learn Look at the writings of Dr. Barbara Oakley or at https://www.coursera.org/learn/learning-how-to-learn https://www.coursera.org/learn/learning-how-to-learn.
- i336_ 9y ago
  Thanks so much, this is now on my todo list :) I found someone uploaded all of the videos to YouTube! Unfortunately I don't have the disk space to download them at this exact moment (been saving for several months for a couple new disks, not quite there yet) so I've base64-encoded the following YouTube playlist URL to heighten the chances the videos stay up til I can grab them (both to archive them and also because I download videos to watch them - old computer). data:text/plain;base64,aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cueW91dHViZS5jb20vcGxheWxpc3Q/bGlzdD1QTFcxcDdMZkhNTW5ERVQxcjh2Ymo4a1FENHNndXM1dnFZCg== I also found https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCojOYrwehhFpaJfYG3DziHA/videos https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCojOYrwehhFpaJfYG3DziHA/vid..., which has some related videos (that I think were placed on YouTube explicitly).

by i336_ 9y ago

aisofteng 9y ago

You imply that emotional intelligence and reasoning ability are a tradeoff. They aren't.

i336_ 9y ago
Woops, that was unintentional. Although... now I think about it... when I'm anxious (I have reasonably mild but fairly broadly scoped anxiety), I can become more emotional/instinctive/reactive to things, and my ability to reason can be greatly impacted as well. So I do think there is some indirect correlation, in practice.
- watwut 9y ago
  Emotional intelligence does not imply that you are driven by emotions. It imply that you understand them, which makes it easier to control how you react. Someone who is emotional is not displaying emotional intelligence at that moment.
  - i336_ 9y ago
    I definitely agree with you there. Often when I feel certain ways, I don't have reference points to mentally articulate how I'm feeling - if I even have the ability to consciously distinguish the feeling and highlight it. That shuts down a lot of internal dialog and analysis before it has the chance to take place. When I'm anxious, my thinking is clouded across the board, which makes this weakness all the more apparent. I wonder if there are any books out there that specifically help to instil an understanding of the nuances in emotional processing.
Joeri 9y ago
Even if they are orthogonal, they are less likely to occur in the same person than either apart.

afarrell 9y ago

> learning how to learn Look at the writings of Dr. Barbara Oakley or at https://www.coursera.org/learn/learning-how-to-learn https://www.coursera.org/learn/learning-how-to-learn.

i336_ 9y ago
Thanks so much, this is now on my todo list :) I found someone uploaded all of the videos to YouTube! Unfortunately I don't have the disk space to download them at this exact moment (been saving for several months for a couple new disks, not quite there yet) so I've base64-encoded the following YouTube playlist URL to heighten the chances the videos stay up til I can grab them (both to archive them and also because I download videos to watch them - old computer). data:text/plain;base64,aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cueW91dHViZS5jb20vcGxheWxpc3Q/bGlzdD1QTFcxcDdMZkhNTW5ERVQxcjh2Ymo4a1FENHNndXM1dnFZCg== I also found https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCojOYrwehhFpaJfYG3DziHA/videos https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCojOYrwehhFpaJfYG3DziHA/vid..., which has some related videos (that I think were placed on YouTube explicitly).