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You're the one who brought up parenthood. You're the one making the claim that having unmarried parents is the same as having only one parent.
by EliRivers 9y ago
You're the one who brought up parenthood. You're the one making the claim that having unmarried parents is the same as having only one parent.
- Svekax 9y agoI don't appreciate being told I'm saying something I am not. I'll make this easy for you. More unmarried couples => more single parent families => more children raised by single parents => the bad things I mentioned.
- icebraining 9y agoMore unmarried couples => more single parent families That's the link that people were questioning. Marriage is not a necessary condition for having a two-parent family, even if the US law is lagging behind in recognizing it. Why would you think that any of those bad things would happen if two parents, who were already planning on living together and raising their children, had to postpone the wedding for a few years?
- chrisseaton 9y agoBut why does more unmarried couples imply more single parent families? I don't understand that leap.
- TheSpiceIsLife 9y agoNo leap. This is a statistical fact.
- DanBC 9y agoCould you point to those statistics please? I'm a bit confused how marriage protects against single person parenting when about half of marriages end in divorce.
- jimmyk 9y agoDo you doubt that ending a marriage tends to be more difficult than ending other romantic relationships?
- DanBC 9y agoFor all I know the difficulty and bitterness of divorce could make it harder for separated couples to co-parent, leading to more single parenting in families that start as married. I'm not sure about that, I'm open to persuasion. But I'm not persuade by people saying {it's obvious}.
- TheSpiceIsLife 9y agoActually, I should retract my previous statement. I don't really know what I wrote that, maybe something I'm personally reactive to. As far as I'm aware what the family relationship counsellors are saying these days (the ones I've spoken to anyway) is that it is conflict that harms children. It matters less whether the parents are together. What's important is that children aren't exposed conflict.
- icebraining 9y agoIs it a fact that everything else being equal, a lack of a legal marriage document causes more single-parent families? How did someone prove that? Because if it's just a correlation, then you're might just be measuring the obvious third-cause: that deadbeat parents are not willing to marry. And that wouldn't be affected by preventing their marriage, since they wouldn't marry anyway.
- EliRivers 9y agoI'm not like you. I won't pretend to be something I'm not by hiding behind passive aggressive phrases like "I'll make this easy for you". You screwed up. You conflated correlation and causation. You fumbled dictionary definitions, suggesting that having unmarried parents was the same as having only one parent. Numerous people called you out on this. You doubled-down and then, when you saw the way it was going, tried to change the conversation and tried to suggest that you were talking about general trends; unmarried parents correlates more strongly with single parents than married parents does. These are ways you screwed up. You can learn from this, and become a better person, more able in the future to have meaningful discussions, or you can ignore it and spit out some more passive aggressive phrases in which you pretend everyone just misunderstands you, posturing for complete strangers who don't even know you. Either way, we're done here.
- dang 9y agoYou've repeatedly been uncivil in this thread. We ban accounts that engage in flamewars, so please don't do that again, regardless of how poorly understood you may be.