Those aren't the wrong places, as they work well for some folks. They've simply not quite worked out for you yet. The truth is that everything is a lottery, tho

Those aren't the wrong places, as they work well for some folks. They've simply not quite worked out for you yet. The truth is that everything is a lottery, though. I'd fully suggest doing social things that you are interested in. A fairly genuine interest - things you would do without expecting a date. Or find some new activities to try - especially things with a mixed group. This puts you in touch with folks that have a common interest upfront. Sometimes the most random places will find a lucky hit :) I'll also say this: You don't necessarily need someone with a similar education or habits of mind, merely one that compliments you or that you can accept. Values are more important, but you won't really know some of those upfront, only over time. The easiest way to solve this is to talk about some of the things important to you early on, with some tact. FWIW, my spouse and I met online .... playing a text-based RPG. We lived in different countries, and have now been married nearly 4 years and together 9. We talked about much of this stuff fairly early on. No children happened to be important to both of us, for example.