4 ms·

"Each goes from rock climber to couch potato, from rebel to middle manager, and from sex crazed to sleep obsessed." Please married folk please tell me this ain

"Each goes from rock climber to couch potato, from rebel to middle manager, and from sex crazed to sleep obsessed." Please married folk please tell me this ain't the case...

quickConclusion 9y ago
Married or not, it is often the case...
deleted 9y ago
[deleted]
RikNieu 9y ago
They also get old and develop chronic medical conditions. Some even become parents after having kids...
zzalpha 9y ago
Please married folk please tell me this ain't the case... What, change? Of course change happens. I'm almost 40 and have been married for 13 years (and we've been together for almost 20). In the last ten years I've learned to: ski, dive, rock climb, and backcountry hike. And while this stuff isn't my wife's thing, she's always supported me 100%. So yes, change is inevitable. How you change is up to you.
framebit 9y ago
I think that's all true, but keep it can also be the opposite. From couch potato to rock climber, etc.
Arizhel 9y ago
Yes, it's really the case. Not for everyone; see the guy who replied bragging about all the physical stuff he's learned to do. However, the odds of both partners in a marriage not turning into fat couch potatoes is very small. (This happened to me: I was married, I'm like that other 40yo guy and do lots of physical stuff, my ex got fat, we got divorced.) Be very, very, very careful who you marry, and if you're not planning on having kids, think very hard about whether you need to even bother getting married at all. It's usually not a good deal, and instead will cost you more with the IRS if you're both working and have similar incomes. IMO, the entire institution is obsolete and should be abolished.
- kelnos 9y ago
  I'm disappointed you're getting downvoted, because you make some very good points (though I'd understand that some people might think you were doing so in an inflammatory way; I choose to read it more charitably). People change, certainly. Some change is palatable, some is not. If you're an active person and plan to be that way until the day you die, and enjoyed being active with your partner... if your partner stops being active, that can be a genuine problem if that aspect is important to you and the relationship. It may not even really be the physical acts around "being active", it could be the fundamental traits and attributes of the person that make them want to or not want to be that way, and I could see those differences ending up being irreconcilable.
  - Arizhel 9y ago
    It wasn't just the activeness that drove us apart; she turned into a raging right-winger. The way I see it, people are going to change no matter what, so this idea that people need to "stick together" until they die is not only obsolete, but just plain wrong. Regular friends usually aren't life-long either, as interests change, people move, etc., so why do we expect romantic relationships to be permanent? It's crazy.
fuckemem 9y ago
I didn't change - I was always a middle manager, sleep obsessed couch potato.
watwut 9y ago
Yeah, but optimally by that point you are sleep deprived too, tired from work and children too and have job that meters to you too. These personality changes happen because circumstances you live in change. Consistent rebels don't hold marriages for long.
Kiro 9y ago
I hate rock climbing and the like, don't want to be a rebel and certainly love sleep more than sex. Sounds perfect to me.
pjc50 9y ago
This is more due to ageing than to getting married.

"Each goes from rock climber to couch potato, from rebel to middle manager, and from sex crazed to sleep obsessed." Please married folk please tell me this ain't the case...

quickConclusion 9y ago

Married or not, it is often the case...

deleted 9y ago

[deleted]

RikNieu 9y ago

They also get old and develop chronic medical conditions. Some even become parents after having kids...

zzalpha 9y ago

Please married folk please tell me this ain't the case... What, change? Of course change happens. I'm almost 40 and have been married for 13 years (and we've been together for almost 20). In the last ten years I've learned to: ski, dive, rock climb, and backcountry hike. And while this stuff isn't my wife's thing, she's always supported me 100%. So yes, change is inevitable. How you change is up to you.

framebit 9y ago

I think that's all true, but keep it can also be the opposite. From couch potato to rock climber, etc.

Arizhel 9y ago

Yes, it's really the case. Not for everyone; see the guy who replied bragging about all the physical stuff he's learned to do. However, the odds of both partners in a marriage not turning into fat couch potatoes is very small. (This happened to me: I was married, I'm like that other 40yo guy and do lots of physical stuff, my ex got fat, we got divorced.) Be very, very, very careful who you marry, and if you're not planning on having kids, think very hard about whether you need to even bother getting married at all. It's usually not a good deal, and instead will cost you more with the IRS if you're both working and have similar incomes. IMO, the entire institution is obsolete and should be abolished.

kelnos 9y ago
I'm disappointed you're getting downvoted, because you make some very good points (though I'd understand that some people might think you were doing so in an inflammatory way; I choose to read it more charitably). People change, certainly. Some change is palatable, some is not. If you're an active person and plan to be that way until the day you die, and enjoyed being active with your partner... if your partner stops being active, that can be a genuine problem if that aspect is important to you and the relationship. It may not even really be the physical acts around "being active", it could be the fundamental traits and attributes of the person that make them want to or not want to be that way, and I could see those differences ending up being irreconcilable.
- Arizhel 9y ago
  It wasn't just the activeness that drove us apart; she turned into a raging right-winger. The way I see it, people are going to change no matter what, so this idea that people need to "stick together" until they die is not only obsolete, but just plain wrong. Regular friends usually aren't life-long either, as interests change, people move, etc., so why do we expect romantic relationships to be permanent? It's crazy.

fuckemem 9y ago

I didn't change - I was always a middle manager, sleep obsessed couch potato.

watwut 9y ago

Yeah, but optimally by that point you are sleep deprived too, tired from work and children too and have job that meters to you too. These personality changes happen because circumstances you live in change. Consistent rebels don't hold marriages for long.

Kiro 9y ago

I hate rock climbing and the like, don't want to be a rebel and certainly love sleep more than sex. Sounds perfect to me.

pjc50 9y ago

This is more due to ageing than to getting married.