4 ms·

Two Kids, In Two Years: Best Time Management Strategy Ever

25 points by voidfiles 16y ago

TotlolRon 16y ago
Two Kids, In Two Years: Best.
bad_user 16y ago
> Maybe you don't need to have kids, but you do need to find some kind of full filling activity, outside of start ups. It will help you focus when you aren't doing that activity. This definitely sounds true. Taking it a little further ... startups are all about freedom and money. As time goes by, those count less and less for me personally. The freedom you get comes with extra responsibilities, and you really don't need that much money to be happy. But there's nothing like a kid coming into the picture ... a little boy is on the way and I want to be there for him in every possible way, never miss his first steps and provide him with all the financial support he needs to succeed in life. Suddenly regular employment doesn't sound so great. Entrepreneurship is exhausting, life itself is exhausting and for the long term you need a motivator outside of feeding your hungry ego.
mkramlich 16y ago
0 kids in 50 years: even better than "best"
- rfreytag 16y ago
  The moment I held my first child changed me for the better. The effect was of stumbling on an Easter Egg hidden in my software. Revelation is an understatement.
  - quickpost 16y ago
    Can you go into more detail about this? I'm struggling with the decision of whether to have a child with my significant other, and wouldn't mind hearing more about how it has affected your mental state, along with your professional life. Thanks!
    - petercooper 16y ago
      I'm not the person you're responding to, but we had our first 8 months ago and I thought I'd interject. For the first few months I got almost nothing done. When other parents say that they "have no time" yet seem unable to answer questions about what they were actually doing, they're not lying or covering up. Time "disappears" like crazy yet also feels like an eternity. Days pass by full of chores, cleaning, and calming a screaming baby.. but like with any form of exercise, the painful aspects are somehow forgotten over time. I certainly share the sentiment that having the demand of a child in your life can help you "focus." If you know that baby monitor might be going off in 1, 2, 3 or 4 hours (and you have NO clue when!) you start working in a way that's quite organized or that is easy to dip in/out of. This works out for the better. With no such demands, it is very easy to rationalize procrastination. It helps a lot to have everything solid with your partner. I'm NOT a natural parent at all and while I love her, my daughter still bugs the crap out of me and I find it hard to "deal" with her for more than an hour or two at a time. I recognize this as a flaw in my personality, but also know I'll be crazy over teaching her things and talking to her when she gets older. This isn't a "man thing" as such, but it certainly seems common (my dad was exactly the same way.) As such, my wife is far and away the primary parent. As a nightowl, I tend to my daughter through the night when she wants feeding, etc, but during the day it's 90% mom. I do a lot of chores though, but the arrangement is that I'm the breadwinner and she's a full-time mom. She's very cool with that, but.. a lot of women might not be. Not sure I can think of anything else off hand, so I'll leave it there for now :-)
    - voidfiles 16y ago
      Man, for me it was a pain in the ass for about 6 months. I love my kids, bu I just couldn't get over how mmuch tiem they took. Over time though I realized that they become necasary to who I am, and not a blocker to who I am. They give me q reason to step away from the computer, and often while switching tracks I come up with good ideas. It's not for everyone though I am lucky enough to have a day job that pays me enough so my wife can stay home, and I suppose a wife that wants to stay home. If you hate kids, don't have kids, but if deep down you think you would, then it might be a good idea, the younger the better, I am 26, and am stocked that when I am 40 my oldest will be 18, so I have all whole nother life to live after this one.
ivankirigin 16y ago
Having a kid is extremely focusing. I had an 8 month old at the start of YC. There was nothing else. With my second's recent arrival, I'm focusing a lot on what I want to do with my time.
fondue 16y ago
Good luck being able to plan that, we tried to have two kids in two years but nature intervened; my wife became pregnant within two months of trying with our eldest and no matter what we tried it took four years for our second.

25 points by voidfiles 16y ago

Two Kids, In Two Years: Best.

> Maybe you don't need to have kids, but you do need to find some kind of full filling activity, outside of start ups. It will help you focus when you aren't doing that activity. This definitely sounds true. Taking it a little further ... startups are all about freedom and money. As time goes by, those count less and less for me personally. The freedom you get comes with extra responsibilities, and you really don't need that much money to be happy. But there's nothing like a kid coming into the picture ... a little boy is on the way and I want to be there for him in every possible way, never miss his first steps and provide him with all the financial support he needs to succeed in life. Suddenly regular employment doesn't sound so great. Entrepreneurship is exhausting, life itself is exhausting and for the long term you need a motivator outside of feeding your hungry ego.

mkramlich 16y ago

0 kids in 50 years: even better than "best"

rfreytag 16y ago
The moment I held my first child changed me for the better. The effect was of stumbling on an Easter Egg hidden in my software. Revelation is an understatement.
- quickpost 16y ago
  Can you go into more detail about this? I'm struggling with the decision of whether to have a child with my significant other, and wouldn't mind hearing more about how it has affected your mental state, along with your professional life. Thanks!
  - petercooper 16y ago
    I'm not the person you're responding to, but we had our first 8 months ago and I thought I'd interject. For the first few months I got almost nothing done. When other parents say that they "have no time" yet seem unable to answer questions about what they were actually doing, they're not lying or covering up. Time "disappears" like crazy yet also feels like an eternity. Days pass by full of chores, cleaning, and calming a screaming baby.. but like with any form of exercise, the painful aspects are somehow forgotten over time. I certainly share the sentiment that having the demand of a child in your life can help you "focus." If you know that baby monitor might be going off in 1, 2, 3 or 4 hours (and you have NO clue when!) you start working in a way that's quite organized or that is easy to dip in/out of. This works out for the better. With no such demands, it is very easy to rationalize procrastination. It helps a lot to have everything solid with your partner. I'm NOT a natural parent at all and while I love her, my daughter still bugs the crap out of me and I find it hard to "deal" with her for more than an hour or two at a time. I recognize this as a flaw in my personality, but also know I'll be crazy over teaching her things and talking to her when she gets older. This isn't a "man thing" as such, but it certainly seems common (my dad was exactly the same way.) As such, my wife is far and away the primary parent. As a nightowl, I tend to my daughter through the night when she wants feeding, etc, but during the day it's 90% mom. I do a lot of chores though, but the arrangement is that I'm the breadwinner and she's a full-time mom. She's very cool with that, but.. a lot of women might not be. Not sure I can think of anything else off hand, so I'll leave it there for now :-)
  - voidfiles 16y ago
    Man, for me it was a pain in the ass for about 6 months. I love my kids, bu I just couldn't get over how mmuch tiem they took. Over time though I realized that they become necasary to who I am, and not a blocker to who I am. They give me q reason to step away from the computer, and often while switching tracks I come up with good ideas. It's not for everyone though I am lucky enough to have a day job that pays me enough so my wife can stay home, and I suppose a wife that wants to stay home. If you hate kids, don't have kids, but if deep down you think you would, then it might be a good idea, the younger the better, I am 26, and am stocked that when I am 40 my oldest will be 18, so I have all whole nother life to live after this one.

ivankirigin 16y ago

Having a kid is extremely focusing. I had an 8 month old at the start of YC. There was nothing else. With my second's recent arrival, I'm focusing a lot on what I want to do with my time.

fondue 16y ago

Good luck being able to plan that, we tried to have two kids in two years but nature intervened; my wife became pregnant within two months of trying with our eldest and no matter what we tried it took four years for our second.