4 ms·

Buying drinks is actually a BAD idea. This hypothesis was tested by Feynman (Surely You're Joking ...), naturally with success. I think I'd feel a little weird

Buying drinks is actually a BAD idea. This hypothesis was tested by Feynman (Surely You're Joking ...), naturally with success. I think I'd feel a little weird trying to psychologically hack my love life (if I had a love life). Also, the mathematical approach doesn't work: Let x denote beauty, -- y, manners well-bred, -- "z, Fortune, -- (this last is essential), -- "Let L stand for love" -- our philosopher said, -- "Then L is a function of x, y, and z, "Of the kind which is known as potential." "Now integrate L with respect to dt, "(t standing for time and persuasion); "Then, between proper limits, 'tis easy to see, "The definite integral Marriage must be: -- "(A very concise demonstration)." Said he -- "If the wandering course of the moon "By Algebra can be predicted, "The female affections must yield to it soon" -- -- But the lady ran off with a dashing dragoon, And left him amazed and afflicted. --from "The Mathematician in Love"

gaius 16y ago
Ah, but it's more subtle than that. You see you have already been hacked. Why do boys automatically buy drinks for girls? It's almost as if we've been programmed to do so, and therefore do it regardless of it "working". But any bloke whose spent any time in pubs knows, if he thinks about it for a second, that you buy rounds of drinks with your mates. Buying drinks is a friendship signal, not a mating signal. And if you do it, that's where you'll end up.
- mhb 16y ago
  that's where you'll end up Having sex with your mates?
  - pigbucket 16y ago
    Not that there's anything wrong with that! (courtesy nod to Seinfeld). It is odd (I don't say telling!) that the standard term for sex partner is a preferred term for a guy's male friend in some places.
    - gaius 16y ago
      "Mate" as in friend is an abbreviation of matelot, a French word for sailor. A lot British English slang originated in the Royal Navy.
  - electromagnetic 16y ago
    My wife was my best friend, I've also known lots of friends who've gone into very long term relationships by doing it, and I just saw a friend start dating his best friend of like 5 years and they've been going well. Honestly, having sex with your (female) mates is the best thing you can do. My biggest problem is finding things in common with women I'm not friends with, but I've already got a list as long as my arm and leg with women I'm already friends with. Honestly I could have spent every night in the pub giving 110% game and I wouldn't have got nearly as much sex as getting married. For a nerd it was a no brainer and my penis thanks me.
- hugh3 16y ago
  Buying drinks is a friendship signal, not a mating signal. Not really. Do you buy drinks for your friends? Of course you do! But do you buy drinks for strangers in bars because you're interested in becoming their friend? No, that would be weird. Why would it be weird? Because buying drinks is widely recognized as a sexual come-on. It's just not a very good one. It's not very good because it's a signal of the form "I am sufficiently desperate for company that I am willing to bribe you just to talk to me". Anyway, it's a bad idea for all sorts of reasons, but "friendship signal" is not, I think, a good description.

gaius 16y ago

Ah, but it's more subtle than that. You see you have already been hacked. Why do boys automatically buy drinks for girls? It's almost as if we've been programmed to do so, and therefore do it regardless of it "working". But any bloke whose spent any time in pubs knows, if he thinks about it for a second, that you buy rounds of drinks with your mates. Buying drinks is a friendship signal, not a mating signal. And if you do it, that's where you'll end up.

mhb 16y ago
that's where you'll end up Having sex with your mates?
- pigbucket 16y ago
  Not that there's anything wrong with that! (courtesy nod to Seinfeld). It is odd (I don't say telling!) that the standard term for sex partner is a preferred term for a guy's male friend in some places.
  - gaius 16y ago
    "Mate" as in friend is an abbreviation of matelot, a French word for sailor. A lot British English slang originated in the Royal Navy.
- electromagnetic 16y ago
  My wife was my best friend, I've also known lots of friends who've gone into very long term relationships by doing it, and I just saw a friend start dating his best friend of like 5 years and they've been going well. Honestly, having sex with your (female) mates is the best thing you can do. My biggest problem is finding things in common with women I'm not friends with, but I've already got a list as long as my arm and leg with women I'm already friends with. Honestly I could have spent every night in the pub giving 110% game and I wouldn't have got nearly as much sex as getting married. For a nerd it was a no brainer and my penis thanks me.
hugh3 16y ago
Buying drinks is a friendship signal, not a mating signal. Not really. Do you buy drinks for your friends? Of course you do! But do you buy drinks for strangers in bars because you're interested in becoming their friend? No, that would be weird. Why would it be weird? Because buying drinks is widely recognized as a sexual come-on. It's just not a very good one. It's not very good because it's a signal of the form "I am sufficiently desperate for company that I am willing to bribe you just to talk to me". Anyway, it's a bad idea for all sorts of reasons, but "friendship signal" is not, I think, a good description.