A reaction can be quick enough to feel instinctual but still be an affectation. Just because a person has said "uh" to fill pauses in speech so often that it f

A reaction can be quick enough to feel instinctual but still be an affectation. Just because a person has said "uh" to fill pauses in speech so often that it feels like it comes without thought doesn't mean it's a behavior outside of their concious control...it just means it's going to take some practice to stop doing it. And that's probably a good analogy because you seem to be reading some persecuting motives here. "Here's an easy viewpoint shift that, with practice, can help you be less alienating/condescending to some people" is not at all equivalent to "you're a bad person for this thing you have no control over".