7 ms·

I am sorry, not a native english speaker. What does this mean?

by badosu 10y ago

danellis 10y ago
Some people have a mental illness that makes them feel like their biological gender isn't the correct one. For some, they "feel like" the opposite gender. Others feel somewhere in between and extrapolate that to mean that there is a spectrum of genders, hence "non-binary".
- badosu 10y ago
  So maybe this is some variation of Gender Dysphoria [0]. [0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_dysphoria https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_dysphoria Edit: It seems it maybe caused by biological factors as well
- oddlyaromatic 10y ago
  Would this really be considered a mental illness? You can experience gender in many ways whilst remaining in good mental health. Gender identity is not always mapped directly to biological sex. It is much, much more than something you "feel like".
besselheim 10y ago
The author of the article believes that their gender cannot be categorised as either male or female (hence a "non-binary" gender), so they prefer for others to refer to them using "they" and its inflected forms, rather than "he" or "she". The singular "they" is already commonly used when the gender of a person is not known, so its extension into non-binary genders is quite sensible, in my opinion. Some others who regard themselves as a non-binary gender prefer invented pronouns such as "xe" or "ze", but I think expecting others to remember and use these is rather unrealistic, whereas "they" has the advantage of already having mainstream use in similar contexts.
ColinWright 10y ago
Here is my understanding, after some extensive conversations with people in the same situation as the author. In English one refers to a male as "him" and a female as "her". However, some people identify as "non-binary", which means that in their own internal self they so not feel that they are entirely male, or entirely female. As a result, they find it not quite right to be referred to as "him", but also not quite right to be referred to as "her". So they prefer to be referred to in the gender-neutral "them". If you are "traditionally aligned", if your personal self-identity matches the body your ghost[0] inhabits, this can be totally mystifying. Personally, I've come to accept that people are weird, and if someone says they want to be referred to as "they" and "them" then why not? [0] "You are a ghost driving a meat covered skeleton made from stardust[1] riding a rock floating through space." [1] Or nuclear waste - take your pick. Edit: To the people downvoting this, it was intended to be a factual answer to a direct and reasonable question. I have no idea why you think this comment is inappropriate and deserves a downvote.
- badosu 10y ago
  That must feel terrible... Is this common? Never heard of it.
  - ColinWright 10y ago
    I have no personal experience of it, but I know people who have. As a result I've read a bit about it. It seems that people in these circumstances can be content with who they are, but the external pressures from society can be overwhelmingly unbearable. I don't know how common it is, but you can look up the terms "non-binary" and "transgender" and find out more. Again, personally, I think we should just let people get on with being who they are. Respect them for who they are and the work they do, and just stay the hell out of their personal lives. No business of mine.
    - badosu 10y ago
      Thanks for the thoughts!
  - 10y ago
umbrai_nation 10y ago
The original post started "He says he attributes...". The author's profile suggests they would prefer "They say they attribute...".

I am sorry, not a native english speaker. What does this mean?

by badosu 10y ago

I am sorry, not a native english speaker. What does this mean?

Some people have a mental illness that makes them feel like their biological gender isn't the correct one. For some, they "feel like" the opposite gender. Others feel somewhere in between and extrapolate that to mean that there is a spectrum of genders, hence "non-binary".

badosu 10y ago
So maybe this is some variation of Gender Dysphoria [0]. [0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_dysphoria https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_dysphoria Edit: It seems it maybe caused by biological factors as well
oddlyaromatic 10y ago
Would this really be considered a mental illness? You can experience gender in many ways whilst remaining in good mental health. Gender identity is not always mapped directly to biological sex. It is much, much more than something you "feel like".

besselheim 10y ago

The author of the article believes that their gender cannot be categorised as either male or female (hence a "non-binary" gender), so they prefer for others to refer to them using "they" and its inflected forms, rather than "he" or "she". The singular "they" is already commonly used when the gender of a person is not known, so its extension into non-binary genders is quite sensible, in my opinion. Some others who regard themselves as a non-binary gender prefer invented pronouns such as "xe" or "ze", but I think expecting others to remember and use these is rather unrealistic, whereas "they" has the advantage of already having mainstream use in similar contexts.

ColinWright 10y ago

Here is my understanding, after some extensive conversations with people in the same situation as the author. In English one refers to a male as "him" and a female as "her". However, some people identify as "non-binary", which means that in their own internal self they so not feel that they are entirely male, or entirely female. As a result, they find it not quite right to be referred to as "him", but also not quite right to be referred to as "her". So they prefer to be referred to in the gender-neutral "them". If you are "traditionally aligned", if your personal self-identity matches the body your ghost[0] inhabits, this can be totally mystifying. Personally, I've come to accept that people are weird, and if someone says they want to be referred to as "they" and "them" then why not? [0] "You are a ghost driving a meat covered skeleton made from stardust[1] riding a rock floating through space." [1] Or nuclear waste - take your pick. Edit: To the people downvoting this, it was intended to be a factual answer to a direct and reasonable question. I have no idea why you think this comment is inappropriate and deserves a downvote.

badosu 10y ago
That must feel terrible... Is this common? Never heard of it.
- ColinWright 10y ago
  I have no personal experience of it, but I know people who have. As a result I've read a bit about it. It seems that people in these circumstances can be content with who they are, but the external pressures from society can be overwhelmingly unbearable. I don't know how common it is, but you can look up the terms "non-binary" and "transgender" and find out more. Again, personally, I think we should just let people get on with being who they are. Respect them for who they are and the work they do, and just stay the hell out of their personal lives. No business of mine.
  - badosu 10y ago
    Thanks for the thoughts!
- 10y ago

umbrai_nation 10y ago

The original post started "He says he attributes...". The author's profile suggests they would prefer "They say they attribute...".