Cringe. Here's how this plays out: I get a knock on the door... "Hello, it's me your long lost child..." "Wait, what? I thought we aborted you?" "Nope! M

Cringe. Here's how this plays out: I get a knock on the door... "Hello, it's me your long lost child..." "Wait, what? I thought we aborted you?" "Nope! Mom secretly put me in a bag and I was raised by Mormons. Would you like me to tell you about Joseph Smith?" "Oh cool, yeah... this is exactly the outcome I hoped for when I paid for her to get an abortion 20 years ago... come on in!"