4 ms·

Awesome! Out of curiosity, what does that look like in terms of action? The idea of an individual taking the individual responsibility as a member of their comm

by Kalium 10y ago

Awesome! Out of curiosity, what does that look like in terms of action? The idea of an individual taking the individual responsibility as a member of their community to help other members of their community represents a wonderful blooming of pure intent, but is perhaps slightly abstract. Also, there's maybe a potential issue with how community is defined. How do you define your community? What could happen if others possibly have different definitions?

germinalphrase 10y ago
That is, of course, the problem for this answer. We have abstracted away our reliance on other people so effectively (whether in reality or perception) that most people don't feel the need to give back. I would feel comfortable considering public service as a requirement of citizenship, to some degree. We don't have military conscription in the United States - but requiring a year of paid public service at age 16-18 would be a reasonable option in my mind.
- Kalium 10y ago
  Great! A solid idea. What do you propose people who are not 16-18 do in their regular lives to take part in helping members of their community that isn't sending money to specialists? It's of course very possible that your experiences and memories may vary significantly from mine, but my experience as a teenager with public service did not consistently inspire empathy for people others in my community. Teenagers are not generally known for their broad-minded feats of empathy, and I was not an exception. As an adult, I have retained a general distaste for people who seek to tell me what community I am a member of. This is not because I resent being part of a community. It's generally because being told I am a member of a community I may not consider myself a member of is a precursor to being told I have a moral duty to provide some resource. I do not enjoy having my empathy tugged at people who only seem to see me as a member of their community when I have something they desire and who will not regard me as a member once I have provided such.
  - sdflkd 10y ago
    > I do not enjoy having my empathy tugged at people who only seem to see me as a member of their community when I have something they desire and who will not regard me as a member once I have provided such. So you helping others is for your own self-satisfaction, and not to help others? You're looking for someone to convine you to be happy with the decision of helping others. That's what all your comments here read like. :) I'm not surprised you're from the Bay Area, given that.
    - Kalium 10y ago
      I'm happy to help others. I'm not happy to feel used. I don't enjoy having my empathy tugged at by people who only care about me because they want money from me. This experience does not leave me feeling like I have contributed to my community and helped a person. It leaves me feeling used.
      - anigbrowl 10y ago
        It's fine to say no to requests. I don't like how organized the charitable industry is in the US and the high-pressure tactics used to solicit donations. I prefer to donate anonymously or tell charitable solicitors that the more often and elaborately they contact me the less likely I am to contribute to their cause. Frankly I prefer just getting cash directly into the hands of people in need and don't burden myself with worrying about which cause should have priority over others.
  - germinalphrase 10y ago
    I feel like you're asking me to understand where you live, what your skills are, and how you can leverage your abilities to help people. I obviously can't and it's not always obvious for people to understand how to figure that stuff out on their own. This is part of the problem with service being an inconsequential part of American culture - there's no "social infrastructure" to identify who needs help and set them up with people who can help them (that aren't, explicitly, social services). I'm less concerned that teenagers are "inspired with empathy" than I am that we as a country have a large group of young people to put to positive social use. A good friend of mine is German. His 'voluntary social year' was to drive an ambulance. I don't care if they are trail building or helping immigrants learn English - having them to engage in social service will help build a culture of service and get some important (but perhaps, unprofitable) work done. I'd say this: if you feel like this is something you want to do then just start trying some things. Organizations that work with youth are super familiar with people showing up all jazzed to do something, then dropping out after a few weeks. Just get out there and try some different things. Sure, it's kinda crappy to do that - but if you don't get yourself into a few different rooms with a few different kinds of people then it's going to be hard to find something that works for you. Second, your presence and effort and compassion will matter more than your wealth. In fact, I don't even know why your wealth should be relevant. Dress down, buy a Casio, downplay your job - whatever. Say "I do boring computer stuff; nothing fancy like Facebook or Google" even if that's true. If you're working with kids they are going to want to know stuff about you, but you should always choose how (and how much) you share. Finally, I work in a service oriented job and there are a regularly days that I drive home feeling burned out/abused/ignored. People can be ungrateful and greedy, but - that's not the point of doing this kind of work. I do it because I believe it matters and makes the lives of young people better. Find your reason that doesn't rely on gratitude (because you're guaranteed not to always get it).

by Kalium 10y ago

germinalphrase 10y ago

That is, of course, the problem for this answer. We have abstracted away our reliance on other people so effectively (whether in reality or perception) that most people don't feel the need to give back. I would feel comfortable considering public service as a requirement of citizenship, to some degree. We don't have military conscription in the United States - but requiring a year of paid public service at age 16-18 would be a reasonable option in my mind.

Kalium 10y ago
Great! A solid idea. What do you propose people who are not 16-18 do in their regular lives to take part in helping members of their community that isn't sending money to specialists? It's of course very possible that your experiences and memories may vary significantly from mine, but my experience as a teenager with public service did not consistently inspire empathy for people others in my community. Teenagers are not generally known for their broad-minded feats of empathy, and I was not an exception. As an adult, I have retained a general distaste for people who seek to tell me what community I am a member of. This is not because I resent being part of a community. It's generally because being told I am a member of a community I may not consider myself a member of is a precursor to being told I have a moral duty to provide some resource. I do not enjoy having my empathy tugged at people who only seem to see me as a member of their community when I have something they desire and who will not regard me as a member once I have provided such.
- sdflkd 10y ago
  > I do not enjoy having my empathy tugged at people who only seem to see me as a member of their community when I have something they desire and who will not regard me as a member once I have provided such. So you helping others is for your own self-satisfaction, and not to help others? You're looking for someone to convine you to be happy with the decision of helping others. That's what all your comments here read like. :) I'm not surprised you're from the Bay Area, given that.
  - Kalium 10y ago
    I'm happy to help others. I'm not happy to feel used. I don't enjoy having my empathy tugged at by people who only care about me because they want money from me. This experience does not leave me feeling like I have contributed to my community and helped a person. It leaves me feeling used.
    - anigbrowl 10y ago
      It's fine to say no to requests. I don't like how organized the charitable industry is in the US and the high-pressure tactics used to solicit donations. I prefer to donate anonymously or tell charitable solicitors that the more often and elaborately they contact me the less likely I am to contribute to their cause. Frankly I prefer just getting cash directly into the hands of people in need and don't burden myself with worrying about which cause should have priority over others.
- germinalphrase 10y ago
  I feel like you're asking me to understand where you live, what your skills are, and how you can leverage your abilities to help people. I obviously can't and it's not always obvious for people to understand how to figure that stuff out on their own. This is part of the problem with service being an inconsequential part of American culture - there's no "social infrastructure" to identify who needs help and set them up with people who can help them (that aren't, explicitly, social services). I'm less concerned that teenagers are "inspired with empathy" than I am that we as a country have a large group of young people to put to positive social use. A good friend of mine is German. His 'voluntary social year' was to drive an ambulance. I don't care if they are trail building or helping immigrants learn English - having them to engage in social service will help build a culture of service and get some important (but perhaps, unprofitable) work done. I'd say this: if you feel like this is something you want to do then just start trying some things. Organizations that work with youth are super familiar with people showing up all jazzed to do something, then dropping out after a few weeks. Just get out there and try some different things. Sure, it's kinda crappy to do that - but if you don't get yourself into a few different rooms with a few different kinds of people then it's going to be hard to find something that works for you. Second, your presence and effort and compassion will matter more than your wealth. In fact, I don't even know why your wealth should be relevant. Dress down, buy a Casio, downplay your job - whatever. Say "I do boring computer stuff; nothing fancy like Facebook or Google" even if that's true. If you're working with kids they are going to want to know stuff about you, but you should always choose how (and how much) you share. Finally, I work in a service oriented job and there are a regularly days that I drive home feeling burned out/abused/ignored. People can be ungrateful and greedy, but - that's not the point of doing this kind of work. I do it because I believe it matters and makes the lives of young people better. Find your reason that doesn't rely on gratitude (because you're guaranteed not to always get it).