I'd suggest step back from everything, go camping away from all tech for a couple of weeks and use that time to reflect upon what makes you happy. You had a pa

I'd suggest step back from everything, go camping away from all tech for a couple of weeks and use that time to reflect upon what makes you happy. You had a passion for the artistic side form what I can tell and also coding, but I have personally found if you mix your passion with work, then getting that balance right can be hard and you will often find your taken advantage of (long hours/work loads, most self impossed) and can only end up burning out and wearing you down and lead to depression. It is a common issue, not just in tech, but the industry does enable it more than other industries. You may find that doing your own passion may well be profitable and by that doing your own company, not contracting, but providing a service of some form. As indeed you have done in the past, via your art initially. But stepping back, and away from all everything, to collect your thoughts and removing all the noise is a great way to get to know yourself what you truly want and what you do not want. Don't let a few bad people/experiences dictate your life, more so when you have had many good people/experiences. Why focus upon the bad more, is often easily done. I appreciate writing about it can be very cathartic and enlightening, but equally, can end up forcing yourself into making decisions based upon the bad and ignoring the good. You may even find yourself writing a book of advice you wished your younger self had read and that is perhaps something to ponder. But don't rule anything out, but do get away from it all and collect your feelings and enable you to work out what you want in life, what you need in life and what you want to avoid in life. Also be mindful that over time those goals/needs and wants change as time goes on, and currently your priority is yourself, what you want, what makes you happy.