10 ms·

67% of black kids have a single parent so if you randomly picked a black person they would likely have been raised by a single parent home. He states that he ca

67% of black kids have a single parent so if you randomly picked a black person they would likely have been raised by a single parent home. He states that he came from a dual parent household from the suburbs. So he isn't an average black person just from statistical point of view. He got really lucky. I think if you give black kids two parents some money and a good school they would probably do as well as everyone else.

dcole2929 10y ago
Serious question. What is the average black person? You can't just pick a single statistic and use that to define what average is. You certainly can't pick something as benign as coming from a dual family home. The average AA male is 5'10. Is he not an average black person if he is shorter or taller? I think overall you missed his entire point, which is basically that it is at best disingenuous to categorize every black person in America as having lived a life of struggle and hardship and at worst racist. His being an entrepreneur is certainly exceptional but his upbringing really isn't. Yet the publication in question basically made the decision that his "blackness" wasn't good material because it didn't contain that element of struggle. That's fine from a narrative perspective I guess but I think he is certainly within his rights to be offended by it.
merpnderp 10y ago
They're no thinking about it. Black kids with two parents who finished high school do statistically slighter better than similar white parents. There's a lot to being said to finishing high school, hopefully going to college, and definitely getting married, to ensure your kids do as well or better than yourself.
ptaipale 10y ago
That 67% number seemed shocking so I tried to dig up a source. Only found this: http://datacenter.kidscount.org/data/tables/107-children-in-single-parent-families-by http://datacenter.kidscount.org/data/tables/107-children-in-... And it says: "In this definition, single-parent families may include cohabiting couples ..." So it may not be quite that bad - co-habiting couples sharing children are not a particular risk setup even if they are not married. Where I live - north Europe - they are entirely normal. But what is the proportion of kids, and black kids, actually living with just one parent in the US?
- greglindahl 10y ago
  Europe is not the USA -- the longevity of unmarried relationships is not the same.
  - ptaipale 10y ago
    I was interested about the statistics of this. 67% living out of wedlock, but how many of these are actual co-habiting parents?
- Mz 10y ago
  From what I have read, the norm for the Black community in the U.S. is that the baby's daddy leaves the picture and mom gets involved with someone else because young Black males are the "last hired, first fired" and also much more likely to spend time in prison than any other demographic in the U.S. So what happens is that many young Black males are not in a position to actually support their children. When "the bum" father who "won't"/can't support the baby exits the picture and mom gets a new boyfriend, since the baby is not his child, anything he does for the baby is viewed as generosity and expression of good character. (Edit: Since you are European, let me explain that this is due to systemic racism and the fact that welfare only pays if you are an unwed mother. So very poor women cannot get married, because they would lose their welfare benefits. This is a horrible thing warping the Black community in directions that Whites then condemn as "immoral" behavior. I have known a White welfare mom who would not marry the father of her kids because he was an unemployed alcoholic and her Catholic mother was incredibly condemning of this, but a) her psycho bitch mother is part of why she was in this mess and b) her psycho bitch mother was not in any position to make sure the kids ate if her daughter lost her welfare benefits. There is a reason we have a saying about how you need to be able to afford middle class morality. Further, the U.S. has a terrible track record compared to Europe in areas such as paid maternity leave...etc. The U.S. is one of the richest countries in the world and most of our children are growing up in poverty because we have very serious issues. This is in no way like YOUR experience.) Furthermore, from what I have read, the Black community in the U.S. is as resilient as it is because they brought a matrilineal orientation with them from Africa: Like a pride of lions, it is female blood relatives that are the backbone of the family for Black Americans. This helps them survive in the face of high unemployment and high incarceration rates, much of it completely unjust. For example, see: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/06/20/derrick-hamilton-jailhouse-lawyer http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/06/20/derrick-hamilto... There is also this (NSFW) piece about discrimination in the fashion industry: http://globalnews.ca/news/3115014/black-mirror-project-highlights-lack-of-diversity-in-the-fashion-industry/ http://globalnews.ca/news/3115014/black-mirror-project-highl... Having said all that, I am very sympathetic to the author of this piece. I am female and I get a lot of flack from other women, apparently for failing to be as crapped on by men as they are and for failing to be as bitter about my life as a woman as they are -- at least, that seems to be the gist of it, as best I can tell. And when I try to talk about what I think works and is effective, the most common response is to accuse me of blaming the victim for telling women what they can do to try to handle life as a woman more effectively, in spite of the assholes in the world. I find it enormously frustrating. Like "Do you actually want a fucking solution? Or do you just like being a victim and want someone to validate that it isn't possible to have anything better?" I spend a lot of time wondering why the fuck I bother trying to be helpful to people. I spend a lot of time wondering if I need to just quit trying to be helpful and just focus on figuring out how to solve my own financial problems, and to hell with the rest of the world because it sure as hell does not give a flying fuck about me, so why should I give a flying fuck about it, only to be kicked in the teeth for it? And I say that (about my own life experience) to say this: Yes, the Black community in the U.S. has real and serious problems. This man's experience is not the norm. But I think he has a valid criticism of the media here. Blacks routinely complain that they are underrepresented in media and they lack good role models because of racism by Whites who control so much media, yet he can't get his story published in a major Black medium because it isn't enough of a sob story. I think that is a completely legitimate thing to point out as something very wrong with the system.
elastic_church 10y ago
Which makes forced integretation of schools, access to credit, and workplace provisions to promote diversity to be actually the best outcomes that 1960s congress could have thought of? We'll Ill be....
jpttsn 10y ago
What do you mean by lucky? Was he destined to be black, and lucky to be among the 75% who aren't poor? Or was he destined not to be poor, and unlucky to be among the tk% who are black? In what sequence does your version of destiny execute its instructions?

dcole2929 10y ago

Serious question. What is the average black person? You can't just pick a single statistic and use that to define what average is. You certainly can't pick something as benign as coming from a dual family home. The average AA male is 5'10. Is he not an average black person if he is shorter or taller? I think overall you missed his entire point, which is basically that it is at best disingenuous to categorize every black person in America as having lived a life of struggle and hardship and at worst racist. His being an entrepreneur is certainly exceptional but his upbringing really isn't. Yet the publication in question basically made the decision that his "blackness" wasn't good material because it didn't contain that element of struggle. That's fine from a narrative perspective I guess but I think he is certainly within his rights to be offended by it.

merpnderp 10y ago

They're no thinking about it. Black kids with two parents who finished high school do statistically slighter better than similar white parents. There's a lot to being said to finishing high school, hopefully going to college, and definitely getting married, to ensure your kids do as well or better than yourself.

ptaipale 10y ago

That 67% number seemed shocking so I tried to dig up a source. Only found this: http://datacenter.kidscount.org/data/tables/107-children-in-single-parent-families-by http://datacenter.kidscount.org/data/tables/107-children-in-... And it says: "In this definition, single-parent families may include cohabiting couples ..." So it may not be quite that bad - co-habiting couples sharing children are not a particular risk setup even if they are not married. Where I live - north Europe - they are entirely normal. But what is the proportion of kids, and black kids, actually living with just one parent in the US?

greglindahl 10y ago
Europe is not the USA -- the longevity of unmarried relationships is not the same.
- ptaipale 10y ago
  I was interested about the statistics of this. 67% living out of wedlock, but how many of these are actual co-habiting parents?
Mz 10y ago
From what I have read, the norm for the Black community in the U.S. is that the baby's daddy leaves the picture and mom gets involved with someone else because young Black males are the "last hired, first fired" and also much more likely to spend time in prison than any other demographic in the U.S. So what happens is that many young Black males are not in a position to actually support their children. When "the bum" father who "won't"/can't support the baby exits the picture and mom gets a new boyfriend, since the baby is not his child, anything he does for the baby is viewed as generosity and expression of good character. (Edit: Since you are European, let me explain that this is due to systemic racism and the fact that welfare only pays if you are an unwed mother. So very poor women cannot get married, because they would lose their welfare benefits. This is a horrible thing warping the Black community in directions that Whites then condemn as "immoral" behavior. I have known a White welfare mom who would not marry the father of her kids because he was an unemployed alcoholic and her Catholic mother was incredibly condemning of this, but a) her psycho bitch mother is part of why she was in this mess and b) her psycho bitch mother was not in any position to make sure the kids ate if her daughter lost her welfare benefits. There is a reason we have a saying about how you need to be able to afford middle class morality. Further, the U.S. has a terrible track record compared to Europe in areas such as paid maternity leave...etc. The U.S. is one of the richest countries in the world and most of our children are growing up in poverty because we have very serious issues. This is in no way like YOUR experience.) Furthermore, from what I have read, the Black community in the U.S. is as resilient as it is because they brought a matrilineal orientation with them from Africa: Like a pride of lions, it is female blood relatives that are the backbone of the family for Black Americans. This helps them survive in the face of high unemployment and high incarceration rates, much of it completely unjust. For example, see: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/06/20/derrick-hamilton-jailhouse-lawyer http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/06/20/derrick-hamilto... There is also this (NSFW) piece about discrimination in the fashion industry: http://globalnews.ca/news/3115014/black-mirror-project-highlights-lack-of-diversity-in-the-fashion-industry/ http://globalnews.ca/news/3115014/black-mirror-project-highl... Having said all that, I am very sympathetic to the author of this piece. I am female and I get a lot of flack from other women, apparently for failing to be as crapped on by men as they are and for failing to be as bitter about my life as a woman as they are -- at least, that seems to be the gist of it, as best I can tell. And when I try to talk about what I think works and is effective, the most common response is to accuse me of blaming the victim for telling women what they can do to try to handle life as a woman more effectively, in spite of the assholes in the world. I find it enormously frustrating. Like "Do you actually want a fucking solution? Or do you just like being a victim and want someone to validate that it isn't possible to have anything better?" I spend a lot of time wondering why the fuck I bother trying to be helpful to people. I spend a lot of time wondering if I need to just quit trying to be helpful and just focus on figuring out how to solve my own financial problems, and to hell with the rest of the world because it sure as hell does not give a flying fuck about me, so why should I give a flying fuck about it, only to be kicked in the teeth for it? And I say that (about my own life experience) to say this: Yes, the Black community in the U.S. has real and serious problems. This man's experience is not the norm. But I think he has a valid criticism of the media here. Blacks routinely complain that they are underrepresented in media and they lack good role models because of racism by Whites who control so much media, yet he can't get his story published in a major Black medium because it isn't enough of a sob story. I think that is a completely legitimate thing to point out as something very wrong with the system.

elastic_church 10y ago

Which makes forced integretation of schools, access to credit, and workplace provisions to promote diversity to be actually the best outcomes that 1960s congress could have thought of? We'll Ill be....

jpttsn 10y ago

What do you mean by lucky? Was he destined to be black, and lucky to be among the 75% who aren't poor? Or was he destined not to be poor, and unlucky to be among the tk% who are black? In what sequence does your version of destiny execute its instructions?