5 ms·

I have to be honest, Louis C.K. is looking more and more wise and moderate by the day. Don't let your young teens have smartphones, even when all of their frien

by M_Grey 10y ago

I have to be honest, Louis C.K. is looking more and more wise and moderate by the day. Don't let your young teens have smartphones, even when all of their friends have one. I realize that's incredibly difficult, but no one said that parenting would be easy, and clearly you can't count on anyone else.

mirimir 10y ago
Yes, well I tell people to make up personas, but ...
- M_Grey 10y ago
  I know, even as a teen that's what I did, probably you too. We have to accept though, that today people are growing up with a fully fledged set of social expectations, driven by marketing and peer pressure. When I was a teen, if I wanted to send a selfie it would have been a fairly involved process including a scanner. Now it's just a mistake you can make anytime. We're doing ourselves no favors as adults, but kids really are getting the greasy end of the stick.
  - mirimir 10y ago
    Ummm, I still do :D But yeah, the Internet never forgets.[0] Maybe people will just need to cut each other more slack. [0] http://www.sltrib.com/home/4461113-155/kirby-the-internet-never-forgets http://www.sltrib.com/home/4461113-155/kirby-the-internet-ne...
Freak_NL 10y ago
> Don't let your young teens have smartphones, even when all of their friends have one. That's a nice way to get your child ostracised by the group. Once a teen leaves elementary not having a smartphone (specifically Android or IOS) is the kiss of death in this modern age.
- M_Grey 10y ago
  That's a very very weak argument for conforming to a potentially harmful set of behaviors, and an old argument at that. "Go to church or your neighbors will shun you!" What an absurd amount of power and choice to cede to companies and people who do not care about you.
  - Freak_NL 10y ago
    Don't mistake that observation for my agreement with the status quo. I am fairly pessimistic about the way smartphones are invading our lives. And personally, I own a smartphone that doesn't even run most 'apps', because it isn't an Android or IOS smartphone — and I am fine with that, because I can handle the consequences (such as they are). But pragmatically speaking, what alternative do you have with a twelve year starting their secondary education? Do you want your child to be the only one in class without a smartphone? Kids in middle/high school use apps (WhatsApp etc.) to stay in touch — not just for gossip and chat, but also for coordination of class assignments and social gatherings — and you want to exclude your child from this? It would be more humane to just send them to school in dungarees and wooden clogs with a 'kick me' sign stuck on their backs for good measure… I'm sure that there lots of places where the majority of a class of twelve year old teens has no smartphone at all, but that is becoming rare in developed countries. Sure, if you could band together with other parents you might be able to come up with a different approach, but that's not what's happening.
    - M_Grey 10y ago
      What you're describing sounds difficult, but ultimately something that can be managed. By contrast I would be concerned about the amount of time a lot of people of all ages spend on cells for RSI reasons alone. When you add a teenage sense of risk and impulse control, things like the SnapChat leaks are notable only for their relative rarity. Then you have this kind of endemic bullshit: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=13930707 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=13930707
- strathmeyer 10y ago
  Every child deserves an adult to teach them how to socialize.
pjc50 10y ago
I don't agree with this, because it's just like the normal helicopter parenting of refusing to let your kids play outside / be exposed to dirt / have bicycles / take risks etc; what happens when they grow up? The transition has to happen at some point, and it's better if you're there when it happens.
- M_Grey 10y ago
  You make it sound like I said, "No computers, no internet, no cameras, nothing!" It will also strongly depend on the temperament and character of the kid in question, but putting that aside, there's a difference between total control and not giving someone a smartphone. Play. Get dirty. Take risks. Life is full of all of that, and most of it doesn't haunt you forever. Kids and smartphones though, it's just a bad combination.
  - Sean1708 10y ago
    Why is kids and smartphones a worse combination than kids and computers?

by M_Grey 10y ago

mirimir 10y ago

Yes, well I tell people to make up personas, but ...

M_Grey 10y ago
I know, even as a teen that's what I did, probably you too. We have to accept though, that today people are growing up with a fully fledged set of social expectations, driven by marketing and peer pressure. When I was a teen, if I wanted to send a selfie it would have been a fairly involved process including a scanner. Now it's just a mistake you can make anytime. We're doing ourselves no favors as adults, but kids really are getting the greasy end of the stick.
- mirimir 10y ago
  Ummm, I still do :D But yeah, the Internet never forgets.[0] Maybe people will just need to cut each other more slack. [0] http://www.sltrib.com/home/4461113-155/kirby-the-internet-never-forgets http://www.sltrib.com/home/4461113-155/kirby-the-internet-ne...

Freak_NL 10y ago

> Don't let your young teens have smartphones, even when all of their friends have one. That's a nice way to get your child ostracised by the group. Once a teen leaves elementary not having a smartphone (specifically Android or IOS) is the kiss of death in this modern age.

M_Grey 10y ago
That's a very very weak argument for conforming to a potentially harmful set of behaviors, and an old argument at that. "Go to church or your neighbors will shun you!" What an absurd amount of power and choice to cede to companies and people who do not care about you.
- Freak_NL 10y ago
  Don't mistake that observation for my agreement with the status quo. I am fairly pessimistic about the way smartphones are invading our lives. And personally, I own a smartphone that doesn't even run most 'apps', because it isn't an Android or IOS smartphone — and I am fine with that, because I can handle the consequences (such as they are). But pragmatically speaking, what alternative do you have with a twelve year starting their secondary education? Do you want your child to be the only one in class without a smartphone? Kids in middle/high school use apps (WhatsApp etc.) to stay in touch — not just for gossip and chat, but also for coordination of class assignments and social gatherings — and you want to exclude your child from this? It would be more humane to just send them to school in dungarees and wooden clogs with a 'kick me' sign stuck on their backs for good measure… I'm sure that there lots of places where the majority of a class of twelve year old teens has no smartphone at all, but that is becoming rare in developed countries. Sure, if you could band together with other parents you might be able to come up with a different approach, but that's not what's happening.
  - M_Grey 10y ago
    What you're describing sounds difficult, but ultimately something that can be managed. By contrast I would be concerned about the amount of time a lot of people of all ages spend on cells for RSI reasons alone. When you add a teenage sense of risk and impulse control, things like the SnapChat leaks are notable only for their relative rarity. Then you have this kind of endemic bullshit: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=13930707 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=13930707
strathmeyer 10y ago
Every child deserves an adult to teach them how to socialize.

pjc50 10y ago

I don't agree with this, because it's just like the normal helicopter parenting of refusing to let your kids play outside / be exposed to dirt / have bicycles / take risks etc; what happens when they grow up? The transition has to happen at some point, and it's better if you're there when it happens.

M_Grey 10y ago
You make it sound like I said, "No computers, no internet, no cameras, nothing!" It will also strongly depend on the temperament and character of the kid in question, but putting that aside, there's a difference between total control and not giving someone a smartphone. Play. Get dirty. Take risks. Life is full of all of that, and most of it doesn't haunt you forever. Kids and smartphones though, it's just a bad combination.
- Sean1708 10y ago
  Why is kids and smartphones a worse combination than kids and computers?