6 ms·

I've lived in other countries a handful of times for fairly brief periods (no longer than 6 months), and it is really true. I've know some people who've spent y

by bane 10y ago

I've lived in other countries a handful of times for fairly brief periods (no longer than 6 months), and it is really true. I've know some people who've spent years abroad, come back to the U.S. and nope right back out as fast as they can find employment back where they came from. It's not a statement about the quality of a place, but really having to go through an adjustment to get used to your new home and then having to readjust back to where you came from (only you keep telling yourself you shouldn't have to since it's your home) and then constant comparisons between places, which you already did as part of your learning of a new place, but now you start to see all the bad stuff about where you're from, but you were used to doing the reverse instead. It takes a while for all the differences to average out in your mind. I don't think I've ever had to too bad, but I've definitely spent a few weeks angry at how terrible Americans drive after coming back from Germany, or how bad service is when coming back from Korea. But I've also had kind of the opposite feeling. After one long stay in Germany, and feeling very foreign, I remember coming home and it not really registering that it happened until I got in the taxi and the driver was playing some R&B. I'm not even an R&B fan but the Americaness of it, after hearing weeks of Europop, hit me like a stick and I suddenly felt very very home.

55555 10y ago
I lived abroad 6 years and coming home always feels weird. Comparatively, I always feel more relieved when returning to my second home, so I guess I still haven't ever recovered from the change that living abroad had on me.
donw 10y ago
Have lived in Japan for about eight years now, with a year-and-a-half somewhere in the middle spent bouncing around Germany. Originally, it felt... very odd, every time I came back Stateside, especially when visiting the podunk suburb where my parents live (and incidentally, where I grew up). Going from a city of 13 million that has quite possibly the best civic infrastructure in the world, to an aging and slowly dying town that barely breaks the 80k mark in terms of population is quite a transition. I think the best way to explain it is... divergence? As in, my path, and the path of that place have diverged. Everything from before that point feels "natural", and everything afterwards feels strange. Now that I've been an expat for awhile, and have bounced around quite a bit, that feeling of oddness seems to have vanished for pretty much everywhere I visit. Sure, things are different in different places, but everything seems to fall into a slot of "this feels right" or "this doesn't suit my tastes", and there really isn't anywhere that has a perfect mix of everything. Although I'll admit, the urge to return stateside has gotten quite a bit stronger over the years. I'm very comfortable in Japan, speak the language, and have a solid social network, but at the same time, I find myself missing a lot of the daily aspects of American life (especially the grocery stores!) There's a really good article on the subject as well; On Being A Triangle (And Other Tips For Repatriation): http://naomihattaway.com/2013/09/i-am-a-triangle-and-other-thoughts-on-repatriation/ http://naomihattaway.com/2013/09/i-am-a-triangle-and-other-t...
- bane 10y ago
  My experiences in Asia come mostly from Korea. Over the last decade or so I've noticed the grocery stores and selection there have dramatically improved such that I can usually find a reasonable analog for just about anything I want (so long as I don't get too fancy or want good cheese). But I've never lived there long enough to probably need that one thing. I think also, I've been married into Korean life so long, most of my home grocery shopping occurs at big Asian grocery stores anyways, so the experience isn't that much to translate. What do you miss about groceries in Japan that the U.S. has?
  - jim-jim-jim 10y ago
    Not him, but dark green lettuce for making a proper salad. It exists in some places, but it's considerably expensive and nearly wilting. People seem to prefer flavorless cabbage/iceberg instead. Maybe it's a fair exchange for all the fresh fish though.
  - Larrikin 10y ago
    The most obvious differences for me were the eggs,I honestly thought I got a bad batch the first time I cooked after moving back because the yolk was so yellow, and the fruit. Fruit was always more expensive, but so long as it was in season, it was almost universally better than what I had eaten in the US.
  - donw 10y ago
    Fruit in Tokyo is both ludicrously overpriced and, in general, mediocre. Japanese people prefer soft fruit, so crunchy apples are very hard to come by. Many common ingredients in Western cooking don't exist -- I would kill for a supply of fresh jalapeños, or potatoes suitable for baking (you only find two varieties of potato in Japanese supermarkets). I can't legally have a barbecue, either, so it's really hard to escape from fried meat here. My cholesterol numbers shot up quite badly when I moved to Japan, even though I'm not that much of a meat-eater (maybe 2-3 times per week). A decently-sized kitchen with room for a stand mixer is basically unobtainable unless you spend serious money on an apartment, not to mention a proper oven. Japanese homes don't have ovens, so you have to buy your own. Ovens sold for the consumer market here are only slightly larger than microwaves, and while they come with more inbuilt computing power than AWS, simple things like "cook at a low temperature for three hours" are impossible. I could go on, but suffice it to say: Japan has many wonderful things, but they don't line up with my hobbies and interests.

by bane 10y ago

55555 10y ago

I lived abroad 6 years and coming home always feels weird. Comparatively, I always feel more relieved when returning to my second home, so I guess I still haven't ever recovered from the change that living abroad had on me.

donw 10y ago

Have lived in Japan for about eight years now, with a year-and-a-half somewhere in the middle spent bouncing around Germany. Originally, it felt... very odd, every time I came back Stateside, especially when visiting the podunk suburb where my parents live (and incidentally, where I grew up). Going from a city of 13 million that has quite possibly the best civic infrastructure in the world, to an aging and slowly dying town that barely breaks the 80k mark in terms of population is quite a transition. I think the best way to explain it is... divergence? As in, my path, and the path of that place have diverged. Everything from before that point feels "natural", and everything afterwards feels strange. Now that I've been an expat for awhile, and have bounced around quite a bit, that feeling of oddness seems to have vanished for pretty much everywhere I visit. Sure, things are different in different places, but everything seems to fall into a slot of "this feels right" or "this doesn't suit my tastes", and there really isn't anywhere that has a perfect mix of everything. Although I'll admit, the urge to return stateside has gotten quite a bit stronger over the years. I'm very comfortable in Japan, speak the language, and have a solid social network, but at the same time, I find myself missing a lot of the daily aspects of American life (especially the grocery stores!) There's a really good article on the subject as well; On Being A Triangle (And Other Tips For Repatriation): http://naomihattaway.com/2013/09/i-am-a-triangle-and-other-thoughts-on-repatriation/ http://naomihattaway.com/2013/09/i-am-a-triangle-and-other-t...

bane 10y ago
My experiences in Asia come mostly from Korea. Over the last decade or so I've noticed the grocery stores and selection there have dramatically improved such that I can usually find a reasonable analog for just about anything I want (so long as I don't get too fancy or want good cheese). But I've never lived there long enough to probably need that one thing. I think also, I've been married into Korean life so long, most of my home grocery shopping occurs at big Asian grocery stores anyways, so the experience isn't that much to translate. What do you miss about groceries in Japan that the U.S. has?
- jim-jim-jim 10y ago
  Not him, but dark green lettuce for making a proper salad. It exists in some places, but it's considerably expensive and nearly wilting. People seem to prefer flavorless cabbage/iceberg instead. Maybe it's a fair exchange for all the fresh fish though.
- Larrikin 10y ago
  The most obvious differences for me were the eggs,I honestly thought I got a bad batch the first time I cooked after moving back because the yolk was so yellow, and the fruit. Fruit was always more expensive, but so long as it was in season, it was almost universally better than what I had eaten in the US.
- donw 10y ago
  Fruit in Tokyo is both ludicrously overpriced and, in general, mediocre. Japanese people prefer soft fruit, so crunchy apples are very hard to come by. Many common ingredients in Western cooking don't exist -- I would kill for a supply of fresh jalapeños, or potatoes suitable for baking (you only find two varieties of potato in Japanese supermarkets). I can't legally have a barbecue, either, so it's really hard to escape from fried meat here. My cholesterol numbers shot up quite badly when I moved to Japan, even though I'm not that much of a meat-eater (maybe 2-3 times per week). A decently-sized kitchen with room for a stand mixer is basically unobtainable unless you spend serious money on an apartment, not to mention a proper oven. Japanese homes don't have ovens, so you have to buy your own. Ovens sold for the consumer market here are only slightly larger than microwaves, and while they come with more inbuilt computing power than AWS, simple things like "cook at a low temperature for three hours" are impossible. I could go on, but suffice it to say: Japan has many wonderful things, but they don't line up with my hobbies and interests.