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I lived 3 years in the UK, and now I am back in Denmark for a while, I hope to return, but lets see what Theresa May & co figures out. I always thought I wanted
by kawsper 10y ago
I lived 3 years in the UK, and now I am back in Denmark for a while, I hope to return, but lets see what Theresa May & co figures out. I always thought I wanted to go for the dual-citizenship, but not anymore.
It is difficult to live in a new place, you don't really feel integrated even though you have friends, speak the language, go to events, pay your taxes, and get the jokes, you will always be the dane and a foreigner.
A thing I noticed when I was away is how stupid and mundane Danish everyday local politics look, and the same with the news cycle. I think it is refreshing and healthy perspective, and I would encourage everyone to go to another country just to get out of their bubble. And also to get some ammunition against people that keep spouting "If I moved to another country, I would assimilate".
When I returned I had adjusted to British service levels, and how fast it is. I was used to get a coffee within minutes of ordering, and when I went to a store and looked a little out of place, I would instantly get help. I got to observe my fellow Danes as a tourist, and oh boy, I now understand why they all seem to think we are rude, and don't really care at all!
But the most odd thing about being back home is that I don't really feel at home, my thoughts and language is some sort of strange danish/british amalgamation, and I feel like a foreigner, even though I bike the streets of my childhood, say hi to people I went to school with, and walk the forests and beaches I was going on adventures in as a child.
- vocatus_gate 10y agoWhen I came back from my first tour to Iraq in 2004 (was 19 at the time) it took me almost a full year to feel mostly "home" again. But it definitely changed something about me, ever since that year I've never felt 100% "home" for some reason.
- kerbalspacepro 10y agoYou're 32 now, right? Have you had some kids and a wife and stuff? Elders in my life seem to imply that the feeling of home will come back when you make it come back. A big part of losing "home" is aging out of it.
- vocatus_gate 10y ago31, but 32 in a few months, yeah. I'm single and unaffiliated at the moment, but hoping to be married in the next couple of years. Feels like the time is right to start that stage of life.
- mathgladiator 10y agoAs an American, I experience almost (not to same degree, but same kind) when I visit Kansas where I grew up. I now live in Washington, and the two states in the same country are entire worlds apart. The people I know in Kansas, I can tell that my thinking has changed a bunch in a multitude of dimensions.
- coredog64 10y agoWestern Washington or Eastern Washington?
- bruceb 10y ago100 to 1 odds Western Washington.
- mathgladiator 10y ago6 miles west of Seattle.
- deleted 10y ago[deleted]
- inv 10y agoI have the same, living in the UK for the last 3 years. Any ideas how to feel home back in Denmark? Do you mind you don't feel 100% home in any of the places?
- kawsper 10y agoYou take the best of both worlds, so no I don't mind it as much anymore. But it makes you think of the all the shenanigans of borders, citizenships and all the time we use on discussing who belongs where, and why.
- ekianjo 10y ago> all the shenanigans of borders, citizenships Yup, same thing here. Once you start living in many places, you realize how deeply artificial all these concepts are.
- nrki 10y agoNot sure that Danes can really talk about artificial borders, given how it's recently become very anti-immigration.
- ribfeast 10y agoAmerican who lived a year in Copenhagen. Just wanted to say that the Danes were aloof, but that I left with an extremely good impression of them. Kind, warm when you know them, reasonable and the kind of humble only janteloven can produce. It taught me a lot to live there-- maybe the most out of all the other ~11 countries I've lived in over the past 15 years. Fantastic country and people, just too darn flat.
- cplanas 10y ago> A thing I noticed when I was away is how stupid and mundane Danish everyday local politics look That's... surprising. I lived a few years in Denmark, and what characterized the country for me was the extreme anti-immigrant tone of the media and the politics. Now I live in the US, and what is happening with the current POTUS seems pretty moderate to me in comparison. Actually that's my five cents on the "reverse culture shock": now I empathize much more with the situation of the immigrants back home.
- roel_v 10y agoI interpreted his comment as 'what seems so big when you're living somewhere, is most likely just noise when you look ay it frim a larger perspective'. In times when I live away from the country I call 'home' (well I've only had 2 countries like that, it's not that I switch every few weeks), I find that I don't miss anything by not keeping up with the details of the news - on the contrary. And in fact, for reentry and reassimilation, it's more important to know what tv shows are popular in the home country than who is minister of foreign affairs.
- justinclift 10y ago> ... my thoughts and language is some sort of strange danish/british amalgamation, and I feel like a foreigner ... Perhaps the term "a broader perspective" is how to describe it?