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I coin toss, but I don't let the outcome determine the action. Instead I let how I feel about the outcome determine the action. Most of the time a coin toss i

by buro9 10y ago

I coin toss, but I don't let the outcome determine the action. Instead I let how I feel about the outcome determine the action. Most of the time a coin toss is not required as I am quite decisive, but if I feel particularly paralysed by an opportunity or decision, and unable to determine the best course of action... then I will toss a coin and look at the outcome, and decide whether or not I feel at peace with the outcome, whether there is regret. I act on the immediate feeling of the outcome, not the outcome itself.

FTA 10y ago
I've read a few different books that say we make decisions from our gut or emotions--logic is only used to try and justify it to ourselves.
- saeranv 10y ago
  Yeap. There's some research that suggests the unconscious mind is better at making complex decisions then the conscious mind. [1][2] "Thinking hard about a complex decision that rests on multiple factors appears to bamboozle the conscious mind so that people only consider a subset of information, which they weight inappropriately, resulting in an unsatisfactory choice. In contrast, the unconscious mind appears able to ponder over all the information and produce a decision that most people remain satisfied with" [1] [1] https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn8732-sleeping-on-it-best-for-complex-decisions/ https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn8732-sleeping-on-it-b... [2]http://people.hss.caltech.edu/~steve/rightchoice.pdf http://people.hss.caltech.edu/~steve/rightchoice.pdf
- CamperBob2 10y ago
  It's also been strongly argued via FMRI research that our decisions are made before our conscious mind is aware of them. Of course, FMRI machines have also diagnosed brain activity in a dead fish, so...
tvanantwerp 10y ago
This is a great technique that I also use. Sometimes it's hard to understand what you really want out of a binary choice. But as soon as you see what fate has decided for you, that gut reaction of elation or dread tells you what you should actually pursue.
rosser 10y ago
Exactly. That's the value of the coin-toss: the fleeting moment the coin is spinning in the air can be an incredible forcing function for revealing your preferences.
- ThrustVectoring 10y ago
  I'm a fan of skipping the coin and just straight-up querying my felt sense instead. See also: Focusing by Eugene Gendlin
TallGuyShort 10y ago
This definitely works. I have some family members who are very indecisive and I take the same approach with them. Can't decide between Restaurant A or Restaurant B? We're going to Restaurant A. Do you feel disappointed or happy? Now you can choose a restaurant.
- deleted 10y ago
  [deleted]
LanceH 10y ago
Not a coin toss, but I put my wife on a clock to make a decision before I hand the decision over to the five year old. After an hour of looking at wallpaper, it turns out she could come to a decision in 2 minutes when on the clock.
solotronics 10y ago
I make a matrix on a spreadsheet and give characteristics with different weights and then give values to those characteristics. I'm not sure if this method is influenced more or less by subconscious bias but at least you can see your bias come to the surface in the categories and weights you assign. https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1MUZ4UwnqZJZYN-T2F_tdHhqs4f6_RNg6Cwx7zH5bfQI/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1MUZ4UwnqZJZYN-T2F_td...
bradleyjg 10y ago
Often you know exactly what you want to do, but that doesn't tell you what you ought to do. Consider deciding whether or not you are going to have ice cream for dessert. On the pro side, ice cream is delicious. On the con side, you are trying to maintain your weight. When the coin goes up in the air of course you are going to be hoping it lands on ice cream, but so what? Ice cream or not isn't a major life decision, or course, but it could easily stand in for deciding to leave you spouse and family to pursue a love affair, leave your steady job to try a start up, or overextend to buy your dream house. The very fact that you are considering it in the first place means that there is a part of you that very much wants to do it, the question is whether or not it is on the balance a good idea. 'Do what you hope the coin lands on' is like 'follow your dreams'. Good advice for some people, in some circumstances -- especially for young, uncommitted people with access to formal or informal safety nets -- but not for everyone in every circumstance.
peteretep 10y ago
When I was a little boy, I used to do this with restaurant menus, choosing between items. I'd tell my parents one of the choices at 'random', and then if I felt disappointed, immediately change my mind.
marvy 10y ago
Someone (Piet Hein) wrote a poem about your strategy: A PSYCHOLOGICAL TIP Whenever you're called on to make up your mind, and you're hampered by not having any, the best way to solve the dilemma, you'll find, is simply by spinning a penny. No -- not so that chance shall decide the affair while you're passively standing there moping; but the moment the penny is up in the air, you suddenly know what you're hoping

by buro9 10y ago

FTA 10y ago

I've read a few different books that say we make decisions from our gut or emotions--logic is only used to try and justify it to ourselves.

saeranv 10y ago
Yeap. There's some research that suggests the unconscious mind is better at making complex decisions then the conscious mind. [1][2] "Thinking hard about a complex decision that rests on multiple factors appears to bamboozle the conscious mind so that people only consider a subset of information, which they weight inappropriately, resulting in an unsatisfactory choice. In contrast, the unconscious mind appears able to ponder over all the information and produce a decision that most people remain satisfied with" [1] [1] https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn8732-sleeping-on-it-best-for-complex-decisions/ https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn8732-sleeping-on-it-b... [2]http://people.hss.caltech.edu/~steve/rightchoice.pdf http://people.hss.caltech.edu/~steve/rightchoice.pdf
CamperBob2 10y ago
It's also been strongly argued via FMRI research that our decisions are made before our conscious mind is aware of them. Of course, FMRI machines have also diagnosed brain activity in a dead fish, so...

tvanantwerp 10y ago

This is a great technique that I also use. Sometimes it's hard to understand what you really want out of a binary choice. But as soon as you see what fate has decided for you, that gut reaction of elation or dread tells you what you should actually pursue.

rosser 10y ago

Exactly. That's the value of the coin-toss: the fleeting moment the coin is spinning in the air can be an incredible forcing function for revealing your preferences.

ThrustVectoring 10y ago
I'm a fan of skipping the coin and just straight-up querying my felt sense instead. See also: Focusing by Eugene Gendlin

TallGuyShort 10y ago

This definitely works. I have some family members who are very indecisive and I take the same approach with them. Can't decide between Restaurant A or Restaurant B? We're going to Restaurant A. Do you feel disappointed or happy? Now you can choose a restaurant.

deleted 10y ago
[deleted]

LanceH 10y ago

Not a coin toss, but I put my wife on a clock to make a decision before I hand the decision over to the five year old. After an hour of looking at wallpaper, it turns out she could come to a decision in 2 minutes when on the clock.

solotronics 10y ago

I make a matrix on a spreadsheet and give characteristics with different weights and then give values to those characteristics. I'm not sure if this method is influenced more or less by subconscious bias but at least you can see your bias come to the surface in the categories and weights you assign. https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1MUZ4UwnqZJZYN-T2F_tdHhqs4f6_RNg6Cwx7zH5bfQI/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1MUZ4UwnqZJZYN-T2F_td...

bradleyjg 10y ago

Often you know exactly what you want to do, but that doesn't tell you what you ought to do. Consider deciding whether or not you are going to have ice cream for dessert. On the pro side, ice cream is delicious. On the con side, you are trying to maintain your weight. When the coin goes up in the air of course you are going to be hoping it lands on ice cream, but so what? Ice cream or not isn't a major life decision, or course, but it could easily stand in for deciding to leave you spouse and family to pursue a love affair, leave your steady job to try a start up, or overextend to buy your dream house. The very fact that you are considering it in the first place means that there is a part of you that very much wants to do it, the question is whether or not it is on the balance a good idea. 'Do what you hope the coin lands on' is like 'follow your dreams'. Good advice for some people, in some circumstances -- especially for young, uncommitted people with access to formal or informal safety nets -- but not for everyone in every circumstance.

peteretep 10y ago

When I was a little boy, I used to do this with restaurant menus, choosing between items. I'd tell my parents one of the choices at 'random', and then if I felt disappointed, immediately change my mind.

marvy 10y ago

Someone (Piet Hein) wrote a poem about your strategy: A PSYCHOLOGICAL TIP Whenever you're called on to make up your mind, and you're hampered by not having any, the best way to solve the dilemma, you'll find, is simply by spinning a penny. No -- not so that chance shall decide the affair while you're passively standing there moping; but the moment the penny is up in the air, you suddenly know what you're hoping